QUESTION: You've been somewhat critical of America's public schools in recent years. Who do you hold accountable for what has gone wrong?

DR. DOBSON: I share the concern of many others about falling test scores, increasing violence on campuses, and the high illiteracy rate, among other serious problems with today's schools. But I am not quick to blame educators for everything that has gone wrong. The teachers and school administrators who guide our children have been among the most maligned and underappreciated people in our society. They are an easy target for abuse. They are asked to do a terribly difficult job, and yet they are criticized almost daily for circumstances beyond their control. Some of their critics act as though educators are deliberately failing our kids. I strongly disagree. We would still be having serious difficulties in our schools if the professionals did everything right. Why? Because what goes on in the classroom cannot be separated from the problems occurring in culture at large.

Educators are not responsible for the condition our kids are in when they arrive at school each day. It's not the teachers' fault that families are unraveling and that large numbers of their students have been sexually and/or physically abused, neglected and undernourished. They can't keep kids from watching mindless television or R-rated DVDs until midnight, or from using illegal substances or alcohol. In essence, when the culture begins to crumble, the schools will also look bad. That's why even though I disagree with many of the trends in modern education, I sympathize with the dedicated teachers and principals out there who are doing their best on behalf of our youngsters. They are discouraged today, and they need our support.

QUESTION: You've said that schools need to have enough structure and discipline to require certain behavior from children whether or not they have a natural interest in the subject being taught. Then you must favor a very structured, teacher-led program, where student behavior is rather tightly controlled. Why?

DR. DOBSON: One of the purposes of education is to prepare a young person for later life. To survive as an adult in this society, one needs to know how to work, how to get there on time, how to get along with others, how to stay with a task until it's completed, and, yes, how to submit to authority.

In short, it takes a good measure of self-discipline and control to cope with the demands of modern living. Maybe one of the greatest gifts a loving teacher can contribute to an immature child, therefore, is to help her learn to sit when she feels like running, to raise her hand when she feels like talking, to be polite to her neighbor, to stand in line without smacking the kid in front, and to do English when she feels like doing soccer. I would also like to see our schools readopt reasonable dress codes, eliminating suggestive clothing, T-shirts with profanity, etc. Guidelines concerning good grooming and cleanliness should also be enforced.

I know! I know! These notions are so alien to us now that we can hardly imagine such a thing. But the benefits would be apparent immediately. Admittedly, hairstyles and matters of momentary fashion are of no particular significance, but adherence to a standard is an important element of discipline. The military has understood that for five thousand years! If one examines the secret behind a championship football team, a magnificent orchestra or a successful business, the principal ingredient is invariably discipline. Preparation for this disciplinary lifestyle should begin in childhood.

QUESTION: If a man and woman really love each other, won't that hold their marriage steady when the storms come?

DR. DOBSON: Not necessarily -- and certainly not if you are thinking of love as a romantic feeling. Feeling wonderful about one another does not make two people compatible over the long haul. Many couples assume that the excitement of their courtship will continue for the rest of their lives. That virtually never occurs! It is naive to expect two unique individuals to mesh together like a couple of machines and to remain exhilarated throughout life. Even gears have multiple cogs with rough edges to be honed before they will work in concert.

That honing process usually occurs in the first year or two of marriage. The foundation for all that is to follow is laid in those critical months. What often occurs at this time is a dramatic struggle for power in the relationship. Who will lead? Who will follow? Who will determine how the money is spent? Who will get his or her way in times of disagreement? Everything is up for grabs in the beginning, and the way these early decisions are made will set the stage for the future.

QUESTION: Would you say that most marital problems are caused by sexual difficulties?

DR. DOBSON: No, the opposite is more accurate. Most sexual problems are caused by marital difficulties. Or, stated another way, couples who have problems in bed often have bigger problems in the other 23 1/2 hours of the day.

QUESTION: My former wife and I were married for thirteen years before we divorced two years ago. She has since remarried and has custody of our twelve-year-old daughter. Recently, I've learned that my ex-wife is saying things to our daughter that I feel are damaging to her spirit. She frequently blames her weight problem, smoking addiction and financial woes on our daughter ("I wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for you"). She also has no respect for our daughter's boundaries and routinely confiscates cash gifts that are received for birthday or Christmas presents. Since I am no longer recognized as the primary care provider, I am somewhat hesitant to raise objections. Still, she is my daughter, and it pains me to see her subjected to this kind of abuse. Should I step in and make things right?

DR. DOBSON: I'm sure what you are witnessing is extremely distressing, and I wish there were legal remedies to help you protect your daughter. Within certain limits, however, your ex-wife is permitted by the court to be a bad mother and even do things that are harmful to the child. If you attack her or try to place her on the defensive, you could even make things tougher for your daughter. Apart from what you can accomplish with your wife through negotiation and personal influence, then, your hands are tied.

There is, however, so much that you can do directly with your daughter -- even though you don't have custody over her. Work hard on that relationship. Be there for her when she needs you. Give her the best of your love and attention when she visits. At twelve years of age, she is at the most vulnerable time of her life, and she needs a father who thinks she is very special. You can have a profound influence on her if you demonstrate your love and concern consistently during this difficult period of her life.

QUESTION: You've discussed briefly some of the physiological and emotional differences between the sexes. Could you list other physical characteristics unique to males and females?

DR. DOBSON: Men and women differ in countless ways, many of which they aren't even conscious of. Here are just a few of those differences:

1. A woman has greater constitutional vitality, perhaps because of her unique chromosomal pattern. Normally, she outlives a man by about five years in the U.S. Females simply have a stronger hold on life than males, even in the uterus. More than 140 male babies are conceived for every 100 females; by the time birth occurs, the ratio is 105 to 100, with the rest of the males dying in spontaneous abortions.

2. Men have a higher incidence of death from almost every disease except three disorders related to female reproduction and breast cancer.

3. Men have a higher rate of basal metabolism than women.

4. The sexes differ in skeletal structure, women having a shorter head, broader face, less protruding chin, shorter legs and longer trunk. The first finger of a woman's hand is usually longer than the third; with men the reverse is true. Men's teeth last longer than do those of women.

5. Women have a larger stomach, kidneys, liver and appendix, and smaller lungs than men.

6. Women have three very important physiological functions that are absent in men -- menstruation, pregnancy and lactation. Each of these mechanisms influence behavior and feelings significantly. Female hormonal patterns are more complex and varied. The glands work differently in the two sexes. For example, a woman's thyroid is larger and more active; it enlarges during menstruation and pregnancy, which makes her more prone to goiter, provides resistance to cold, is associated with the smooth skin, relatively hairless body, and the thin layer of subcutaneous fat which are important elements in the concept of personal beauty. Women are also more responsive emotionally, laughing and crying more readily.

7. Women's blood contains more water (20 percent fewer red cells). Since red cells supply oxygen to the body, she tires more easily and is more prone to faint. Her constitutional viability is therefore strictly a long-range matter. When the working day in British factories, under wartime conditions, was increased from ten to twelve hours, accidents among women increased 150 percent; the rate of accidents among men did not increase significantly.

8. Men are 50 percent stronger than women in brute strength.

9. Women's hearts beat more rapidly than those of men (80 beats per minute versus 72 beats per minute). Their blood pressure (ten points lower than men) varies more from minute to minute, but they have much less tendency to high blood pressure -- at least until after menopause.

10. Female lung capacity is about 30 percent less than in males.

11. Women can withstand high temperatures better than men due to differences in their metabolism.

12. Men and women differ in every cell of their bodies because they carry a differing chromosomal pattern. The implications of those genetic components range from obvious to extremely subtle. For example, when researchers visited high school and college campuses to study behavior of the sexes, they observed that males and females even transported their books in different ways. The young men tended to carry them at their sides with their arms looped over the top. Women and girls, by contrast, usually cradled their books at their breasts, in much the same way they would a baby.