parenting

Teenager May Find More Career Direction After 'Gap Year'

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | July 27th, 2015

Q: Our son just graduated from high school, but isn't ready for college. Mariano's considering military service, but I worry that he'll never go to college if he enlists. His job options are few in our small town, and I'm afraid he'll just drift if he stays here. Our minister suggested a "gap year" in a service program. Can you recommend a program for a teen with talent who hasn't figured out how to use it?

A: A gap year -- a break from formal education, often between high school and the start of college -- can include traveling, volunteering, interning, working or a combination of activities. The time off can be a good option for students such as Mariano, "as long as the year has a purpose, structure, routine and goals that will help him bring the benefits of further education into focus," says Sally Reed, editor of College Bound, a monthly publication on college admissions and financial aid (collegeboundnews.com).

Ideally, this time away from formal education increases self-awareness, challenges comfort zones and encourages experimentation with possible careers, according to the American Gap Association (americangap.org).

For example, Mariano might consider the following programs that attract high school students interested in doing a year of service before heading to college.

-- AmeriCorps offers a range of opportunities from VISTA (Volunteers In Service To America), a program that helps eradicate poverty through education initiatives, to FEMA (Federal Emergency Management Agency) Corps, which puts young people at the forefront of disaster relief.

AmeriCorps' National Civilian Community Corps (NCCC) is a full-time residential program for men and women ages 18 to 24. NCCC is modeled on the successful Civilian Conservation Corps of the 1930s. Members work from one of five campuses -- Denver; Baltimore; Sacramento, California; Vicksburg, Mississippi; or Vinton, Iowa.

AmeriCorps volunteers receive a modest living allowance and limited health benefits. Check out various programs at nationalservice.gov/programs/americorps.

-- The National Park Service's Public Land Corps restores and protects America's National Parks. Members, who are between 16 and 25 years old, receive a living allowance and are trained to build and preserve trails in remote areas, prevent wildfires by clearing fire fuels, remove invasive species and add features that keep park visitors safe. Go to nps.gov/gettinginvolved/youthprograms.

-- City Year (cityyear.org), a national youth service program founded in 1988, operates in 26 cities across the United States. Members are a diverse group of 18- to 25-year-olds who complete a year of rigorous community service, leadership development and civic engagement.

"City Year brings young people together to do great work, center themselves and decide their futures," says David Caplan, dean of New York's City Year chapter. "I love to see Corps members go from their service year to colleges and universities, work for Fortune 500 companies or even start their own nonprofits. The experience teaches them firsthand their power to change the world around them."

-- If Mariano chooses to go into military service, encourage him to connect with Student Veterans of America (SVA), an organization that helps veterans get the resources needed to succeed in higher education. (Learn more at studentveterans.org.)

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Teen Must Learn to Strive for Achievement, Not Perfection

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | July 20th, 2015

Q: My daughter Mikayla, a high school freshman, recently moved in with my new wife and me. She's such a perfectionist! Her room looks like Martha Stewart cleaned it. She's a competitive athlete and an A student, but stresses over things that don't go according to her plan. We're happy we don't have to nag her about school, but worry she's too obsessed with grades and getting into a top college. Should we be?

A: Since she's just settling in with you, it's unfair to Mikayla to assume she has a problem with perfectionism, says Dr. Jane Bluestein, educator and author of "The Perfection Deception" (Health Communications Inc., 2015).

"Welcome her with open arms," she says. "There's much to praise in a high-achieving teen who keeps her room tidy, aces her courses and has her eye on college. Take time to know her better. Support her efforts to excel."

That said, today's teens are subject to many parental, peer, academic and media pressures that can lead them to think that they must be perfect, notes Bluestein.

"To help her focus on the satisfactions of accomplishment, rather than the impossibility of perfection, help her learn four fundamental lessons," she advises.

One, the goal of effort should not be achieving perfection, but doing our best, says Bluestein.

"There's a big difference," she explains. "Perfectionism -- the belief that we can make all things perfect if we put in the right amount of effort -- has high costs: stress, loneliness, fear of failure, perceived loss of control, negative self-worth should the littlest thing go wrong. These can lead to a mental health crisis if they add up."

Two, it's OK to take risks and fail.

"Recognize her achievements, precision, care, attention to detail," says Bluestein, "but also make her aware that highly successful people succeed because they aren't afraid to fail. In Silicon Valley, it's viewed as a strength to have failed in a few start-ups, because it means you've gained experience that will be valuable when you tackle your next venture."

Encourage her to join a group such as a robotics or STEM (science, technology, engineering and math) club, where trial-and-error projects are valued.

Three, accept and use constructive criticism, says Bluestein.

"The ability to view feedback as a positive, not a negative, helps high achievers benefit from the wisdom of others and develop resilience," she says. "It defines them as learners who can work collaboratively as part of a team."

Four, help her develop a strong social and emotional core that will serve her when she's challenged by her goals. One way is to reflect on her achievements.

"Contrary to conventional wisdom, successful high achievers know how to take time out for themselves. They don't multitask 24-7. They nourish their souls, and can step back to gain perspective," says Bluestein. "They can calm their minds and look within so that they can continue to be creative. Perfectionists are so good at being busy that taking time to reflect feels like cheating."

As she embarks on her high school career, encourage Mikayla to be guided by Winston Churchill: "Success is not final. Failure is not fatal. It is the courage to continue that counts."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Utilize These Strategies to Improve Son's Reading Skills

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | July 13th, 2015

Q: Our son Liam's teacher suggested we work on reading comprehension skills this summer. He starts third grade this fall. We're reading daily. Is that enough?

A: As you read together, you can do simple things to boost Liam's ability to understand ever-more complex texts.

Comprehension skills are "the essential tools that children need to actively engage with content, construct meaning and grow their understanding of big ideas in the world," says reading expert Debbie Miller, author of "Reading With Meaning" (Stenhouse, 2012).

Until recently, reading was taught as a progression of five skills: phonemic awareness, phonics, fluency, vocabulary and comprehension. Today, comprehension is front and center, especially within the Common Core State Standards (CCSS).

"CCSS emphasizes higher-level comprehension work, even for our youngest readers," says Miller.

Kids with strong comprehension skills connect new information to what they already know. They determine and remember key points in a passage. They use text clues to guess new words. They synthesize information to gain new knowledge. They also distinguish fiction from nonfiction.

The academic nonprofit Urban Education Exchange lists 21 strategies in its Concepts of Comprehension framework. By reading with Liam, you have a perfect opportunity to teach some of these before school starts:

-- Find explicit information. After reading, ask Liam questions about information in the text. Have him show you where it's located.

-- Be able to tell fiction from nonfiction. Reading and discussing paired books on a common theme can help Liam learn the difference. For example, if you've read a "Star Wars" book, follow it up with Brian Floca's gripping true story of "Moonshot: The Flight of Apollo 11" (Atheneum, 2009). You can find paired books that match up Liam's interests at your library or online.

-- Make predictions. Discuss a story's title and ask Liam to guess what it might be about and to explain his reasons. Stop occasionally to ask him to predict what will happen next and why.

-- Describe the setting. In other words, have Liam tell you where and when the story takes place.

-- Determine the main idea. The "big idea" can be in a title, the opening passages or even the last sentence. Have Liam make note of words that are repeated. At the end of the story, have him summarize the main idea.

-- Determine the story's sequence. Most books for young readers have a clear beginning, middle and end. As you read, discuss its sequence. Use a graphic organizer if you find it helpful.

-- Find clues to new words. Help Liam look for context clues. For example, words such as is, are, was, were, like, including, known as, meaning, or called provide clues.

For example, in this sentence, "Several African nations, including Gabon, Uganda and Kenya, are on the Equator," the word "including" gives readers clues as to what are the three nations.

-- Learn how to read the different parts of text features. Especially important in nonfiction reading are headlines, graphic devices and pictures that help organize information. Find articles in magazines, newspapers or online news sites. Point out headlines, sidebars, photographs, captions, graphs and other features that would help a reader understand the story.

-- Finally, make it fun! Weave these strategies into your reading time in a conversational manner so that it never seems like a drill. Keeping Liam interested, curious and eager to read should be your main goals this summer.

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

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