parenting

Some Suggestions on Becoming More Involved in Kids' School

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 22nd, 2014

Q: One of my partner's and my New Year's resolutions is to become more involved in our kids' school. Our work makes it impossible to volunteer or attend meetings during the school day. What other activities make a difference in helping them succeed?

A: It's useful to have met with your children's teachers at least once during the school year, preferably early so you can build a relationship. But the most important things you can do to boost your children's school success happen within your family -- in the attitudes you foster and activities you pursue with your kids on nights and weekends.

"Research gives us new ways to think about parent involvement," says Bill Jackson, founder and CEO of GreatSchools.org, a national organization dedicated to guiding parents in getting a great education for their children.

"What this couple should resolve is more involvement in their kids' education," he says. "There's a difference. There's nothing wrong with active parental participation at school, but the real drivers of school success are the things parents do outside of school -- the standards you set and the beliefs you hold about achievement."

Jackson outlines the drivers that matter.

-- Prepare children for learning. "This means making sure that kids get good nutrition, exercise, quality sleep, are on time for school and have good attendance," says Jackson. "You can't learn if you're absent. This may seem like a no-brainer, but there's a lot of learning lost when kids are tired or hungry in class."

-- Partner with teachers. Solve problems collaboratively. Don't automatically accept your child's version of every issue.

"Seek out great teaching, too. It's OK to request the best teachers," Jackson advises.

-- Support literacy and numeracy development. "There's not enough time for adequate math and reading skills practice in class, so supplement at home," says Jackson.

Cultivate key skills early. Read and talk with children daily. Engage in number talk and problem solving. Ensure math-fact mastery. Guide kids to higher-level math.

-- Build knowledge. "This means model curiosity; talk about new information, books and ideas," says Jackson.

"Make connections to topics children are studying. For example, use the spelling list to build vocabulary by spotting the words used in various contexts. Discover and feed kids' interests. Do they love 'Star Wars' movies? Take them to NASA.org to explore past and future Mars expeditions. Show your kids that learning is fun by being a lifelong learner yourself."

-- Build character. Help kids become emotionally intelligent and resilient.

"Promote enduring values kids can fall back on," suggests Jackson. "Foster a growth mindset, the belief that our most basic abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work -- that brains and talent are just the starting point. This keeps kids from giving up and thinking, 'I'm just not good at that.'"

-- Advocate for excellence; choose great schools. "Speak up for high standards," advises Jackson. "Know school strengths and weaknesses. Choose high-performing, good-fit schools for your kids."

-- Put college on your kids' radar early. "Talk about post-secondary pathways," says Jackson. "Set the expectation as early as elementary school that they will go to college. Don't wait until they're freshmen and discover that they should have worked harder at algebra."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Holiday Bonding Ideas for a Blended Family

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 15th, 2014

Q: I don't look forward to this holiday break. Our four preteens from a newly blended family like the structure of school, but fall apart on weekends: bickering and competing for attention. In January, they have state testing, so I plan to do some homeschooling during vacation. Are there any good online test prep sites?

A: You want to turn the holidays into a study hall? You'll get the Grinch of the Year award!

"I understand the desire to replicate successful routines during stressful times, but practicing math facts over Christmas is likely to backfire," says Marissa Gehley, founder of KNOW (Kids Need Our Wisdom). "Kids need a breather, so forget the test prep. Focus on family-building activities. Everyone will be emotionally stronger and go back to class in a fresher frame of mind."

Develop new family traditions: Rituals add joy and structure to holidays. Since you're a newly blended family, create new traditions to observe. For example, the family might decide to create a holiday recipe book and add to it each year. Or have a family movie night, enjoying classics such as "Elf," "The Polar Express," "The Muppet Christmas Carol," "How the Grinch Stole Christmas," "Miracle on 34th Street," "It's a Wonderful Life" and "Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer." Discuss the themes and lessons in these movies.

Create a New Year letter: When two families come together, there's news to share. Let kids create the family's holiday greeting. It could be an email, an annotated slide show posted online for friends, or a printed card. Ask everyone to contribute an original piece of writing, art or a photo.

Give back: There are plenty of opportunities for families to volunteer this time of year, from collecting for Toys For Tots to stocking food pantries. Check doinggoodtogether.org to find a good fit. Or use the search tool at networkforgood.org to find projects for families.

Make a 2015 family resolution: What can the family do together to foster enjoyment and take the stress out of everyday life? It might be planning a family pizza and movie night each month; check commonsensemedia.org for reviews. Alternatively, "you might decide as a family to train for and participate in a 5K run or a bicycling event for a charity you all can support," says Gehley.

That resolution might also include scheduling regular family dinners. What kids really want, says Gehley, is more time with their parents. Meals are a good place to find it. Studies show that when families regularly eat dinner together, kids eat better, have fewer eating disorders, get better grades and are less likely to abuse alcohol and drugs.

"Dinner-table conversations give parents opportunities to check in on academic, behavioral or physical changes. You gain more insight than simply asking, 'what happened in school today?'" says Gehley. "Whatever activities you choose to enjoy together over the holidays, your newly expanded family is likely to be grateful for the opportunity to learn, grow and play together. Nothing allows the brain to work at full capacity like a loving, healthy and engaged home environment."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Are Tablets Ok for Preschoolers?

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 8th, 2014

Q: My husband wants to get our preschooler her own tablet. We've read to her on ours since she was a baby. Our pediatrician is concerned. We thought reading to her was a good idea. What does it matter whether we read on a screen or on paper?

A: Experts are divided on this. While the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) strongly encourages parents to read to children from birth, they recently issued recommendations advising parents to "minimize or eliminate altogether" any screen exposure (tablets, phones, TVs) for children younger than 2, citing research on brain development. For older preschool children, the AAP suggests limiting screen time to less than two hours a day. (For more, go to healthychildren.org.)

There is research suggesting that too much screen time has negative effects on kids, from increased childhood obesity and behavioral problems to poor sleep patterns.

There is less research on children using screens to learn to read. "I don't know why the AAP decided it's smart to ban screen time," says Dr. Marilyn Adams, one of the nation's foremost reading researchers. "How about banning time with 'bad' screens?"

Adams says it's the quality of the content and interaction that matters. She's less concerned about whether kids turn a paper page or swipe a tablet page and more concerned that parents understand the benefits of reading to their children "early and often."

Researcher and educator Dr. Michael Milone says that the two key elements associated with reading to kids are joint attention (both of you focusing on the same thing) and the nature of the interaction (talking, pointing, explaining and such).

"There are qualitative and quantitative differences in both elements," says Milone, "when the text is a book versus a digital device.

"In the traditional view of comprehension, the book is probably superior. But we're entering a different world, one in which traditional comprehension isn't as highly valued as before. If you can write code or analyze data to predict a change in the price of natural gas, you will be successful, even if your favorite reading is a series of tweets."

Because digital devices are convenient and entertaining, "they will become dominant, if they are not so already," says Milone. "It may be comparable to the change that took place when writing and books became dominant over memory and the oral transmission of information. It's going to happen, so we have to adapt to it."

If you decide on a tablet, choose a device and content that will enhance your daughter's emotional and cognitive development. Many educators and parents rely on Children's Technology Review (www.pickyteacher.com). Its Children's Technology Review Exchange, or CTREX, is a database of education software and hardware that helps parents quickly determine which apps, games and digital media are best suited to their kids. You can browse online in guest mode, or you can subscribe and get full reviews and rating details for $59 a year.

CTREX is for people who are tired of gimmicky review sites with outdated information, says Dr. Warren Buckleitner, the founder of Children's Technology Review and an editor.

"There are no suspicious ratings, affiliate links or social agendas," he says. "Subscribers can learn about a new product the day it's released."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

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