parenting

Monitor Social Media Activity Before Applying to Colleges

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 23rd, 2013

Q: My daughter, a high school senior, is a heavy social media user. She has a long Facebook history, some of which is not so flattering. She's applying to colleges, and her counselor suggested that she clean up immature postings because colleges check them. Is that true? If so, should we pay a service to scrub her online footprint? She's got good grades and hopes for a scholarship. We don't want to hurt her chances.

A: Yes, college admission officers may go online to check out what their applicants are posting on social media, says Rob Franek, a Princeton Review college admissions expert.

The New York Times recently reported findings from a Kaplan Test Prep survey that indicated "30 percent of the admissions officers said they had discovered information online that had negatively affected an applicant's prospects."

This is a sobering statistic for students with active social media accounts. "A student could have earned great SAT scores, gotten good grades and submitted stellar essays, but all of that hard work may be negated if he or she has an offensive, immature or inappropriate online presence," says Franek, author of "The Best 378 Colleges, 2014 Edition" (Random House/The Princeton Review, 2013).

If your daughter has a less-than-ideal online presence, don't panic, but do clean up those unflattering past posts. "Hiring a professional to do that may be a necessity if you or your daughter don't know how to manage this properly or don't have the time," Franek advises. "But taking steps to correct this will be very important and give each of you a little peace of mind."

Franek suggests ways you and your daughter can do damage control: First, your daughter should put her privacy settings on the highest level of security. Make sure that she does not come up on searches by checking on a different browser after updating the settings.

Block apps on Facebook so that her name isn't associated with those either. "This may frustrate some teens who think it will limit their ability to interact with friends online, but ultimately it will be worth it," says Franek.

"A friend may know that your daughter's quirky tweet or photo was intended as a joke, but the person deciding whether to admit her to her dream school may not. Make all accounts private. It'll keep the strangers out. One can still control who one connects with online when one's privacy settings are on high."

Once your daughter has made all her accounts private (including Instagram), have her go through each account and delete all posts that represent her less-than-proudest moments. There may be posts that she has completely forgotten about, or that appear inappropriate when taken out of context.

Remind your daughter to be responsible when posting new items. "After college, when job searching, prospective employers may check her online profile as well," says Franek. "When it comes to social media posts, it's best to err on the side of being conservative and always to remember to put one's best 'selfie' forward."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Field Trips, Volunteering Good Ways to Spend Holidays

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 16th, 2013

Q: My kids' cousins, ages 6 to 11, will visit over the holidays, and I don't want them all glued to video games. We need some educational and inexpensive -- but fun -- things to do. Do you have any suggestions?

A: The following activities won't feel like school; they will make a batch of good memories and offer a lot of learning:

-- Plan family field trips. "Every corner of our nation has a few special spots kids love -- it might be a museum, a science center, historic area, or a natural area -- that are part of our heritage and worth knowing well," says Naples, N.Y., educator Greta Love.

"In our area, kids love places like the Corning Glass Museum, where they see glass made, the Rochester Museum and Science Center, or natural areas, such as the High Tor preserve to see bald eagles."

Noted Florida ornithologist Elizabeth Hailman says her grandkids love the Loxahatchee National Wildlife Refuge, which encompasses more than 220 square miles of the Everglades.

"Visitors walking on dikes can see many water birds, some land birds and alligators," she says.

Family field trips represent informal learning at its best, says Jamie Stuve, president of the Jupiter Inlet Lighthouse and Museum in Jupiter, Fla. Kids who visit the iconic 1860 lighthouse get to know a site that has been inhabited for 5,000 years.

"They don't realize they're learning geography, history, anthropology, ecology ... The list goes on," Stuve says. "When they take this information back to their classrooms, it makes them more powerful readers and writers."

Field trips don't need to break the bank. Many government-run natural areas are free or charge by the car. Check online for free or "on sale" days for children at local museums and science centers.

-- Celebrate your family history, says Maryland educator Shirley Harden. With cousins visiting, it's a good time to "decorate the family tree. Have kids interview older family members to preserve traditions, anecdotes, recipes and cherished memories.

"Kids love to hear ancestor stories. It's important to remember that Great Aunt Mia immigrated to the U.S as a young woman with a handful of family recipes and started a successful restaurant. Publish a digital or paper archive to give to family members near and far as a New Year's gift."

-- Teach the joy of giving. Volunteering as a family develops a positive service habit that stays long into adulthood, says Karen Bantuveris, founder and CEO of VolunteerSpot, a resource that helps people coordinate volunteer opportunities.

Follow these guidelines: Choose volunteer activities kids can relate to, such as collecting blankets and food for a local animal shelter or raising money for a food pantry. Discuss why your effort will make a difference. Help kids see the impact of their work by delivering the blankets to the animal shelter or giving a check representing funds collected to the food pantry. Make sure children are welcome and can do the work. (This often rules out soup kitchens.)

Talk about your family's service experience, says Bantuveris. "Discuss what you did, why you did it, how it felt and what you learned. Build on your kids' enthusiasm and right then choose your next service project together."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

parenting

Think Creatively When Giving to Teachers at Holidays

A+ Advice for Parents by by Leanna Landsmann
by Leanna Landsmann
A+ Advice for Parents | December 9th, 2013

Q: Our school district discourages holiday gifts to teachers and bans any gifts costing more than $50. I think the policy is very "Grinch-y." My daughter loves her teacher, and we want to give her a spa day certificate. Should we?

A: No. It's a nice idea, but it may cause discomfort for the teacher. Spa services are very personal. A mani-pedi may be on your Christmas list, but what if the teacher hates having her feet scrubbed?

There's the district ban to consider, too. Unless a spa day in your town costs less than $50, which is unlikely, you'll violate the policy and put the teacher in the position of explaining why she can't accept.

While gift bans are appealing -- especially as many families struggle with household budgets -- they can stifle kids' holiday spirits. "Good teachers are beloved and kids want to show their appreciation, so many schools encourage a class-wide effort. A parent collects from those who wish to contribute and chooses a gift all students can put their name on so that no one is left out," says Sharon Paul, a Massachusetts elementary teacher and mother of three.

What do teachers want? A-Plus Advice Teacher Board members offer Santa some ideas:

-- Gift cards that will help teachers buy materials for their classrooms. Teachers spend an average of $500 out of pocket for books, teaching resources and supplies, such as tissues. They'll appreciate gift cards to office supply stores, bookstores or big-box stores such as Target or Wal-Mart.

-- A donation of time or money to a teacher's favorite charity. Involve your kids; design gift certificates that kids fill out and decorate. For example, "The Rodriguez Family volunteers to work three hours at the Happy Tails Animal Shelter during Christmas break in Ms. Rauch's honor."

-- Show genuine expressions of appreciation. Create a personalized memory book from your daughter or the whole class. (Conspire with a teacher's aide to obtain class pictures.) Include quotes or drawings from students. Add photos of the year's highlights, such as the day they made rockets. No time to create a class memory book? Craft a handmade card that holds your daughter's heartfelt message.

-- Host a holiday appreciation lunch or tea. Many parent-teacher organizations organize a buffet in schools with restrictive gift policies. "It's a festive way to thank teachers," says Tim Sullivan, president of online resource PTO Today (ptotoday.com). If you have the time and budget, add gift bags for each faculty and staff member. Local businesses, such as bookstores, grocers and coffee shops, often wish to chip in with gift cards.

"Personal gifts are only appropriate if you know the teacher well and have a unique opportunity," says Paul. "One year my daughter's teacher got a puppy, so parents chipped in for a bed, chew toys and other things she'd need. It was a big hit, and the kids were very captivated by the puppy's growth."

(Do you have a question about your child's education? Email it to Leanna@aplusadvice.com. Leanna Landsmann is an education writer who began her career as a classroom teacher. She has served on education commissions, visited classrooms in 49 states to observe best practices, and founded Principal for a Day in New York City.)

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