Wow! Things went literally and physically south on July 11 at a press dinner on New York's Upper East Side in support of Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s presidential campaign. According to Page Six, as Kennedy answered questions, someone posed one about climate change, but before Kennedy could answer, Doug Dechert, the event host, screamed, "The climate hoax!" Which brought a scold from art critic Anthony Haden-Guest, who called him a "miserable blob." The two continued their exchange, with Kennedy calmly looking on, until Dechert loudly released a "prolonged fart" while yelling, helpfully, "I'm farting!" After attempts to change the subject and more verbal antics, the evening wound down. The next day, Dechert told Page Six, "I apologize for using my flatulence as a medium of public commentary in your presence." How do I get on this guest list? [Page Six, 7/12/2023]

Creme de la Weird

Notre Dame quarterback Sam Hartman, who sat out some of last season with Wake Forest University, underwent surgery in August 2022 to remove blood clots and the rib closest to his collarbone, 247Sports.com reported. Hmmm, what to do with that extra rib? Hartman's mom, a nurse, is making a necklace for him with the bone. "It's actually clean. It is well on its way to becoming a necklace," he said. "I asked her to try and make it like a puka shell-type deal with the riblike shark's tooth at the end." Hartman said the jewelry might appear in a couple of pregame warmups. "It won't be worn a lot." [247Sports.com, 7/13/2023]

Awesome!

Australian sailor Tim Shaddock, 51, of Sydney and his dog, Bella, became stranded in the Pacific Ocean after they set out from Mexico for French Polynesia, a 3,700-mile trip, in April. The boat became damaged in storms, the BBC reported, and Shaddock drifted until mid-July, when a helicopter spotted him. A tuna trawler picked up the pair, who were in surprisingly good health. Shaddock said they ate raw fish and collected rainwater, and he sheltered from the sun beneath the boat's canopy. "I have been through a very difficult ordeal at sea," he said. "I'm just needing rest and good food." [BBC, 7/17/2023]

Buh-Bye

In Glastonbury, Connecticut, 11 boats took off from the Seaboard Marina on July 12 -- make that with the marina. WTNH-TV reported that a 200-foot section of dock with 11 boats attached broke off and started floating down the Connecticut River, later passing through Cromwell, Portland, Middletown and Haddam. One part of the errant dock was still floating downstream the next day; officials said it was likely that flooding in Vermont had caused the high waters that set the structure free. Teddy Charton of Middletown said he "got a call that my boat was floating down the river ... It ended up all the way down in Chester." Eventually all but one of the boats was recovered. [WTNH, 7/14/2023]

Ewwwww

Multiple wrecks tied up northbound I-95 in Bridgeport, Connecticut, on July 17, all attributed to one cause: A tractor-trailer was leaking human waste onto the roadway, which caused a motorcyclist to lose control and crash, the Associated Press reported. Several vehicles crashed into each other or concrete barriers on the slippery roads, and another truck skidded into a state police cruiser, which then rammed into another cruiser. No one was seriously hurt in the pileup. The driver was charged with reckless endangerment and reckless driving, as officers believed he knew of the gross leak but kept driving. [AP, 7/18/2023]

How Hot Is It?

To demonstrate the deadly heat inside a closed car, the staff of the National Weather Service in Midland, Texas, baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies on a car's dashboard on July 18, United Press International reported. While it was 105 degrees outside, the dashboard registered 190 degrees -- high enough to bake the cookies in about 4 1/2 hours. "Even though ours weren't golden brown, we can confirm that they are done and delicious," NWS employees wrote on Facebook. [UPI, 7/20/2023]

It's Come to This

When a backyard bunny breeder bundled their belongings and said bye-bye to Jenada Isles, a community in Wilton Manors, Florida, they left behind between 60 and 100 lionhead rabbits, who have now infiltrated the neighborhood and are driving residents bonkers. Click Orlando reported that the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission has declined to intercede, so resident Alicia Griggs is heading up an effort to raise the money needed to capture, neuter, vaccinate and rehome the rabbits -- to the tune of $20,000 to $40,000. "People don't realize they're exotic pets and they're complicated," Griggs said. "They have to eat a special diet. You can't just throw any table scraps at them." Residents complain that the bunnies dig holes, chew wiring and leave droppings on sidewalks and driveways. Others think the rabbits are cute, but experts say their heavy coats and finicky digestive systems aren't conducive to living wild in Florida. "They are not equipped to thrive on their own," said Eric Stewart, executive director of the American Rabbit Breeders Association. [Click Orlando, 7/17/2023]

Bright Idea

Michael Raduga, 40, founder of the Phase Research Center in Russia, but -- critically -- NOT a doctor or neurosurgeon, nearly lost his life in June when he tried to implant a chip in his brain on his own, in his living room in Kazakhstan. The Daily Mail reported that Raduga lost more than a liter of blood in his quest to control his dreams. He said he practiced on five sheep's brains and watched hours of neurosurgery on YouTube before starting on his own head. "During the first 30 minutes I was ready to give up many times because ... I was afraid I could just lose consciousness," Raduga said. "I finished the surgery, I took a shower and I worked for 10 hours straight. People didn't know." But neurosurgeon Alex Green of the University of Oxford wasn't having it. "This is an extremely dangerous thing to do," he said. "We are probably decades away from being able to synthesize new experiences." [Daily Mail, 7/15/2023]

News You Can Use

Oddity Central reported on July 21 that a young woman named Xiaohua in Huizhou City, China, suffered a ruptured eardrum following a moment of passion with her boyfriend. When she went to the emergency room because of loss of hearing, a doctor saw blood on her eardrum and asked if she'd had any physical trauma to her ear. Nope, she said, but, "When he kissed my ear, he sucked it hard and it made a 'pop' sound. After that, I couldn't hear in my left ear." The hospital's deputy director of otolaryngology head and neck surgery, Fu Jia, said eardrums usually heal on their own. [Oddity Central, 7/21/2023]

It's Good To Have a Hobby

"Frog Lady" Helen Claypool of Kirksville, Missouri, passed away in December 2022, KTVO-TV reported, so the time has come to liquidate her collection of frogs. Claypool had more than 15,000 frogs -- so many that she and her late husband, Don (nickname: Toad), had to build an addition on their house. She started collecting at age 6 and kept 47 logbooks, documenting each one, complete with photos. The Claypools even opened their home to the public as Helen's House of Frogs Museum. Now the whole frog fantasy is on the auction block. [KTVO, 7/19/2023]

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In 1973, Nissim Kahlon was living in a tent on a beach north of Tel Aviv, Israel, the Associated Press reported. He started scratching into a sandstone cliff wall along the beach, and eventually excavated a cave and moved in. Fifty years later, his created home is a sandcastle, with multiple floors, staircases, detailed mosaic floors and plumbing. But now Israel's Environmental Protection Ministry is moving to evict Kahlon, saying the structure is illegal and threatens the coastline. He said he first got a demolition order in 1974, but since then the government has left him alone, even connecting his home to the electrical grid. "I am not leaving here," Kahlon, 77, said. "I am ready for them to bury me here. I have no other home." [AP, 7/12/2023]

But Why?

French President Emmanuel Macron now has the singular distinction of being the first French head of state to receive a body part in the mail, the Evening Standard reported. On July 10, a severed finger belonging to a "living human being" arrived at the Elysee Palace, where it was "initially put in a fridge where the police put their snacks," a source said. "This was to make sure it was preserved and could be analyzed as quickly as possible." The former owner of the digit was identified and given "full medical support," but it was unclear what the meaning behind the delivery was. [Evening Standard, 7/13/2023]

The Tech Revolution

The Toronto Zoo has a favor to ask of visitors to Nassir the gorilla: Please don't show him photos or videos on your phone. Like any other 24-year-old primate, Nassir is "fascinated by videos, and screen time would dominate his life if he had it his way," according to the zoo's website. The Toronto Star reported that Maria Franke, director of wildlife conservation and welfare, is noticing the effect of visitors sharing their content. "It was causing him to be distracted and not interacting with the other gorillas ... He was just so enthralled with gadgets and phones and the videos." A sign now warns visitors: "Some content can be upsetting and affect their relationships and behavior within their family." Phones down, humans. [Toronto Star, 7/7/2023]

Precocious

An 8-year-old boy faces multiple charges, including first-degree robbery, after he carjacked a vehicle at gunpoint on July 11 in Montgomery, Alabama, WSFA-TV reported. Officers tried to stop the car, but the little driver wouldn't stop and later crashed into another car. A witness, "Snake" Knapp, said he saw the kid pick up two adults along the way. "I think parents just really need to know where their kids are, what their kids are doing," Knapp mused. [WSFA, 7/11/2023]

Ewwww

Doctors at the Wright-Patterson Medical Center near Dayton, Ohio, presented a case in the New England Journal of Medicine on July 6 that detailed a man whom they diagnosed with "hairy tongue." Gizmodo reported that the 64-year-old consulted with doctors when he developed a green, fuzzy layer on his tongue. He was prescribed antifungals, but they didn't help. Hairy tongue occurs when keratin causes a buildup of papillae, the tiny projections on the tongue. The man was directed to scrub his tongue with a toothbrush four times a day and stop smoking, and the green fuzz disappeared. [Gizmodo, 7/12/2023]

Welcome to My Fetish

Lakewood, Colorado, police are searching for a serial panty thief, The Denver Gazette posted on July 6. The unknown suspect, described as having short black hair, a black goatee, dark eyes and a muscular build, allegedly lifts women's underwear from laundry rooms at the Lakewood Towers at Belmar apartments. Over the course of at least 26 incidents, he "has taken approximately $4,881 worth of items," Lakewood police said. [Denver Gazette, 7/6/2023]

Animal Antics

-- People living in the Travis Heights neighborhood of Austin, Texas, are thinking twice about venturing outdoors -- and it's not because of the heat. A red-shouldered hawk is terrorizing pedestrians -- to the point that U.S. mail delivery has been suspended in the area indefinitely, KTBC-TV reported. "Imagine walking out of your house and knowing that you're going to get punched in the back of the head by an animal with large talons," said Alfred Del Barrio. He said he avoided the hawk on a run because he saw its shadow. Nicole Netherton of the Travis Audubon Society said the hawk is protecting its young. "Trying to ignore them so that they can get their business and breeding done is probably the best advice," she said. State and federal laws protect migratory birds. Meanwhile, residents are asked to pick up their mail at a local post office until further notice. [KTBC, 7/10/2023]

-- A wedding at Maison Albion in Albion, New York, recently sported an unexpected extra member of the wedding party, People reported. J, a llama, was hired to be a surprise groomsman by the bride's mother, who knew her daughter wants to own a llama farm one day. Llama Adventures provided J and outfitted him in a tux that made him look as if he was wearing white gloves and standing on two legs, and he gamely stood with the other groomsmen as the nuptials took place. "The bride was absolutely delighted," said photographer Cathy Craft, "and the guests thoroughly enjoyed it." [People, 7/7/2023]

Police Report

Quincy, Illinois, police are hunting for a rabbit, NBC Chicago reported. Early on July 6, someone wearing a full bunny suit entered the Winners Wash Laundromat and rifled through drawers, stuffing several items into a backpack. Surveillance video caught the fuzzy culprit, who has not been identified. Quincy police are hopping mad and seeking leads. [NBC Chicago, 7/7/2023]

Least Competent Criminal

KLKN-TV reported that on July 11, an unnamed 20-year-old man from Lincoln, Nebraska, was pulled over near Norfolk as he drove his motorcycle at speeds up to 106 mph. The driver had a suspended license and, in fact, had just left the Stanton County Courthouse, where he had been sentenced for ... driving with a suspended license and speeding. The judge had ordered him to pay fines for both offenses. He was charged again and bonded out of jail. [KLKN, 7/11/2023]

The Continuing Crisis

The Nikko Japanese Steak and Sushi Bar in Pace, Florida, has closed after an incident in June, WSB-TV reported. The Santa Rosa County Sheriff's Office investigated after seven people were hospitalized following meals at the restaurant, finding that bottles and packets of soy sauce tested positive for methamphetamine. But no charges were filed, as detectives could not determine who contaminated the food "due to lack of witness observations and surveillance footage." On July 7, the restaurant's owners announced on Facebook that they would be closing: "Today, a family-owned and operated business is closed, and 20 employees are out of work, all because of the power of social media," the post read. [WSB, 7/11/2023]

Seems Like a Bad Idea

The crater of the inactive Teoca volcano outside Mexico City is home to a football pitch where 10 teams play each weekend, Yahoo! News reported on July 10. "It's a unique pitch," said player Adrian Garcia. A league representative said the field is about 70 years old; before it was converted to a sports venue, it was a ceremonial site. Goalkeeper Daniel Mancilla Pena called it a "very nice setting to play football." Yeah, well, Mexico sits on the Ring of Fire, a seismically and volcanically active zone, so make sure you don't have much stoppage time. [Yahoo! News, 7/10/2023]

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But it wasn't his job. Still, Beirut Report journalist Habib Battah got his hands dirty on a recent flight from Paris to Toronto, Canoe reported. "An hour into the transatlantic flight ... I kept smelling something gross and couldn't figure it out," Battah wrote on Twitter. While investigating, he discovered a large, "wet to touch" stain on the floor around his seat. The strap of his backpack, which was under the seat, was soaked in it, and a flight attendant only gave him some wipes to clean it up before "casually (noting) a passenger had hemorrhaged on a flight before ours," Battah said. He said the Air France staff were shocked because a crew had removed the seats after the previous flight's incident, but apparently hadn't cleaned the bloody carpet. "This is not a customer service issue -- it's a BIOHAZARD," Battah wrote. "There is fresh human blood on your aircraft." [Canoe, 7/4/2023]

Oops

The Presbyterian Ladies' College in Croydon, Australia, a private girls' school, recently had egg on its face after drone footage captured the suggestive shape of a new garden bed on the campus, The Sydney Morning Herald reported on July 5. The garden was designed by an architectural firm; a school staff member said that as they considered chairs for the garden, they "sent a drone up to take pictures. At a certain angle from up high, the garden ... took on a phallic shape which was unintended and unexpected. As a result, the architects made some alterations which were completed within 72 hours of the drone pictures." One unidentified former student said, "The immediate response was laughter ... Photos have been circulating among the school as memes, saying 'oh good morning' and various kinds of jokes." [Sydney Morning Herald, 7/5/2023]

The Golden Age of Air Travel

On July 2, as an American Airlines flight prepared to depart Dallas-Fort Worth International Airport, one passenger had a massive change of heart about her trip, The Dallas Morning News reported. The woman rose from her seat and headed to the front of the plane, yelling and pointing toward the back, "I'm telling you, I'm getting (expletive) off, and there's a reason why I'm getting (expletive) off, and everyone can either believe it or they can not believe it. ... That (expletive) back there is NOT real. And you can sit on this plane and you can die with him or not. I'm not going to." The TikTok user who posted a video said the outburst delayed the flight by three hours, as passengers were forced to deplane and reboard; the woman was not arrested and, in fact, got back through security. American said the passenger was "met at the gate by law enforcement and removed from the flight." [Dallas Morning News, 7/4/2023]

What Could Go Wrong?

Alef Aeronautics has announced that the Federal Aviation Administration has cleared the startup's flying car, the Model A, to fly for purposes including research, development and exhibition, United Press International reported. The California company calls its invention a vehicle takeoff and landing aircraft, or VTOL, which can drive and park like a normal car. While it is not certified (yet) for public road travel, the company says the FAA's OK will place it closer to "bringing people an environmentally friendly and faster commute ... This is one small step for planes, one giant step for cars," said CEO Jim Dukhovny. [UPI, 7/3/2023]

The Entrepreneurial Spirit

Chandler, Arizona, taxidermist Rachel Lewis, 38, has found her niche in the world of preserving dead animals: She makes piggy banks out of stillborn piglets. Metro News reported that Lewis, a former hairdresser, took a taxidermy class four years ago and just came up with the piggy bank idea in May. "Most of my specimens I get from local farms around me," Lewis said. "I feel like they get to live a second life ... it's kinda cool." She called her process "labor-intensive," involving hollowing out the insides and adding a pork ... er, cork plug. "I have a larger pig that I plan on doing as a piggy bank, too," she said. She also hopes to make objects with jewelry boxes and "secret stash" compartments. [Metro News, 6/28/2023]

Inexplicable

Michael Banks, 36, told Brevard County (Florida) sheriff's deputies that he decided to go "car surfing" after he left a Home Depot store on July 5 in Merritt Island, Click Orlando reported. Banks allegedly climbed on top of a van, then jumped from it onto a Nissan truck, an SUV, a Jeep, another SUV and a sedan, causing damage to each vehicle in the neighborhood of $1,000. He faces two counts of criminal mischief and was held at the county jail. [Click Orlando, 7/5/2023]

Questionable Judgment

The Greater Muscatine (Iowa) Chamber of Commerce and Industry is apologizing after a controversial Fourth of July parade entry drew heated responses, KCRG-TV reported. The entry consisted of a man on horseback, leading a woman on foot dressed in Native American attire. The woman had a rope tied around her hands. "The group (submitting the entry) stated that their intention was to pay homage to the Cherokee Nation on how unjustly they were treated," read a statement from the GMCCI, but "the entry does not represent our community." [KCRG, 7/5/2023]

Recent Alarming Headline

Carol Dillin of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, is trying to get to the bottom of a nighttime visitor that keeps banging on her back door, waking up her family. KFOR-TV reported on July 6 that Dillin's security cameras have captured a flying object that may be a bat or a large moth; all of her attempts to block or scare the animal away, including plastic owls and a scarecrow, have failed. "I thought somebody was hitting baseballs against the house. Then it started sounding like basketballs," Dillin said. Micah Holmes of the state wildlife department said his money is on a moth. "This is a good year for moths because it's been pretty wet," he said. "This is the time of year they're out and trying to mate." Meanwhile, Dillin has decided to take the ultimate step: "We have a guy coming Friday morning to give us an estimate" to close off the porch, she said. [KFOR, 7/6/2023]

Bright Idea

The long lines at Wimbledon are legendary, but Jesse Besse, 28, from South London and her flatmates came up with a plan to make the wait ultra-comfy. The Mirror reported that the friends brought their living room sofa with them and set it up in the queue, enjoying Pimms and strawberries. "The queue is part of the tournament, so you have to sort of expect you're in for the long haul," Besse said. "We arranged for our other friends to pick it up when we got near the front and it's back safe and sound in the lounge now." Even better, Snug, the company that makes the sofa, got in touch and paid for the group's tickets. Score! [Mirror, 7/6/2023]

Field Report

Emma Tetewsky, 31, of Stoughton, Massachusetts, went missing on June 26, WBZ-TV reported, and her family were frantic to find her. On July 3, a group of hikers at Borderland State Park in Eastland called police after hearing a woman "screaming for help in a swamplike area," officials said. Tetewsky was found in "thick brush and swamp" about 50 feet off the trail, where she said she'd been stuck for three days. "We did initially try to pick her up, but the weight of her on top of our body weight sunk us further," said Easton police officer Corey McLaughlin. "It took me 20 seconds to get my feet out of the mud," added officer Jason Wheeler. Tetewsky's family said she suffered from severe dehydration but was otherwise unharmed. [WBZ, 7/6/2023]

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