Cynthia Lynn Teeple, 47, of Jacksboro, Tennessee, was charged with public intoxication after Campbell County Sheriff's deputies found her topless in a LaFollette backyard with two miniature horses on Aug. 30, according to authorities. WLAF reported the homeowner told deputies Teeple had been eating grass and dirt from the horse enclosure, and also chewed on one of the horses' manes. Teeple then volunteered that "the horse's hair is made of Laffy Taffy and Airhead candy," according to the arrest report, and admitted she had taken methamphetamine the day before. [WLAF, 9/8/2020]

Bright Ideas

-- In Botswana, cattle are left to graze and roam during the day, but that makes them vulnerable to attacks by lions, leopards and other carnivores, so two conservation biologists from the University of New South Wales in Australia have come up with an idea to allow both cattle and cats to co-exist, NPR reported. Because big cats hunt using the element of surprise, the biologists came up with a way to make the predators believe they'd been seen by their prey and then abandon the hunt. "We tested this by painting one-third of a cattle herd with artificial eye spots (on their backsides)," explained Cameron Radford, and over four years, "none of the cows that we painted with artificial eye spots were killed by ambush predators." Village chiefs and native farmers "look forward to us coming back and painting more eyes on bums," Radford said. [NPR, 8/23/2020]

-- Conducting choir practice indoors was out of the question for Mark Potvin, instructor of music at Luther College in Decorah, Iowa, given the school's COVID-19 protocols, and finding a space outside posed a challenge until, "I was driving past the city pool," Potvin told KCRG, and "noticed they were draining the pool." Officials at Decorah Park and Rec gave their blessing, and now choir members rehearse while standing in the empty pool, socially distanced and masked. Luther College has five choirs and one of the nation's largest collegiate music programs. [KCRG, 9/10/2020]

Least Competent Criminals

-- John Travis Ross, 33, and Joshua Ray Corban, 18, were charged with conspiracy and attempting to smuggle contraband into the Central Mississippi Correctional Facility in Pearl, Mississippi, after a drone they used as a delivery device became tangled in a net above the prison fence, according to a Department of Corrections statement. The Associated Press reported the drone was caught on Aug. 26 and carried 2 ounces of marijuana, a cellphone, cigarette lighters, phone chargers and headphones, corrections commissioner Burl Cain said. Investigators were able to trace the drone's flight and discovered security video showing the men launching it. Cain said officials plan to reprogram the drone and use it at the state's maximum-security prison in Parchman. [Associated Press, 9/9/2020]

-- Three teenage girls in Clinton, Connecticut, have been arrested and charged with stealing a duck after photos of them surfaced on social media, according to police. WTNH reported the girls took a duck named Quackers out of a pen in mid-August at the Grove Garden Center Nursery, where it was recovering from a raccoon attack, and posted photos of themselves with Quackers at the town beach and a house party. The girls were charged with larceny and trespassing. Quackers is still missing. [WTNH, 9/10/2020]

Suspicions Confirmed

Brittany Keech of Belding, Michigan, got an unexpected bit of news with her mail on Sept. 8. "Sitting right on top of the mail," she told WXMI, was a postcard dated 100 years ago -- Oct. 29, 1920. "Yeah, that's a little too slow," Keech said. The Halloween greeting from young Flossie Burgess was addressed to her cousins: "I just finished my history lesson and am going to bed pretty soon." A USPS spokesperson said, "In most cases ... old letters and postcards -- sometimes purchased at flea markets, antique shops and even online -- are re-entered into our system ... (and) as long as there is a deliverable address and postage, the card or letter gets delivered." [WXMI, 9/9/2020]

Ewwwww

-- An unnamed 17-year-old girl in Bokaro, India underwent surgery on Aug. 31 to remove a 15-pound hairball from her stomach following years of obsessive hair-chewing, Metro News reported. A team of doctors led by Dr. G.N. Sahu initially thought the mass was a tumor, but discovered the hairball during the six-hour surgery. The girl was reported to be in stable condition following the procedure. [Metro News, 9/7/2020]

-- Doctors at a hospital in Dagestan, Russia, were shocked to discover the source of a woman's stomach distress was a 4-foot-long snake that had apparently slithered into her mouth as she slept outside her home in Levashi village. In a video of the procedure, a doctor is heard to say, "Let's see what this is," Yahoo News Australia reported, as a tube is inserted down the anesthetized woman's throat. Local residents say such incidents are not unheard of in the mountainous area. [Yahoo News, 9/1/2020]

Obsessions

Akiko Obata, who lives in Chiba Prefecture in Japan, holds the Guinness World Record for the largest collection of Sampuru, the fake food restaurants use to promote their offerings. Sampuru is an important part of Japanese food culture, according to Oddity Central, and after 15 years of collecting, Obata now has more than 8,000 individual items filling an entire room in her house. "Replicas are not real food, but I truly respect how each of them are made to look so real," Obata said. [Oddity Central, 9/3/2020]

Irony

Bounty Cheramy, 22, smelling of alcohol and swaying back and forth, was arrested and charged with drunk driving on Aug. 30 after his Mazda allegedly struck an electronic traffic sign flashing the message, "Drive Sober or Get Pulled Over," according to a police affidavit. Officers in Port Charlotte, Florida, said Cheramy told them he had been on his phone and "suddenly struck something" but was unsure what it was. His car sustained heavy front-end damage, and the nearby sign was wrecked, The Smoking Gun reported. The affidavit also noted Cheramy recorded a blood alcohol content twice the legal limit in two breath tests. [The Smoking Gun, 9/2/2020]

Overreaction

A 34-year-old Wichita, Kansas, man died after a disagreement over leftover barbecue beans escalated, KWCH reported. On Aug. 2, Ryan Speight returned to the home he shared with his uncle, David Staley, 57, and went to the kitchen, where Staley questioned him about eating the beans, according to an arrest affidavit. Staley told police Speight became upset, pushing and punching Staley, who, in response, picked up a knife from the counter and "jabbed Ryan one time in the chest." Staley was charged with voluntary manslaughter. [KWCH, 9/10/2020]

Awesome!

World War II veteran Suttie Economy, 94, of Roanoke, Virginia, developed a taste for Juicy Fruit gum during the war and is well-known around town for passing out sticks of his favorite flavor to everyone he meets. Now, CNN reports, Economy has been granted his dying wish: to be buried in a casket painted to look like a package of Juicy Fruit. After initially having his request for permission turned down, Economy's friend Sammy Oakey, owner of Oakey's Funeral Service, received a call from a Mars Wrigley company vice president approving the use of its logo. The company even delivered 250 packs of gum to Economy's family. Meanwhile, Economy is living at the Virginia Veterans Care Clinic, where his health is improving. [CNN, 9/9/2020]

Ander Christensen, 27, of Lincoln, Nebraska, has had to take time away from his job to field the media requests that have been pouring in since his Aug. 31 appearance before the Lincoln City Council, reported The Washington Post. Reading from a script, Christensen, whose father, Roy, is a councilman, made an impassioned plea against the widespread use of the term "boneless chicken wings," pointing out that "boneless chicken wings are just chicken tenders" and don't "actually come from the wing of a chicken." Laughter and applause broke out in the chamber as Christensen made his presentation, and his father said the council was "taking the matter under advisement. ... He's a chemical engineer by profession," he said of his son, "but he's a comic at heart." [The Washington Post, 9/4/2020]

Bright Idea

Officials in Amsterdam have installed 12 hemp-filled urinals around that city's notorious red-light district in an attempt to control if not eliminate late-night public urination, or "wild peeing." The boxes, called GreenPees, resemble planters, according to CNN, and the hemp filters inside turn urine into an organic fertilizer and water that feed the plantings on top. During initial trials in 2018, inventor Richard de Vries said, "there was a 50% reduction in wild peeing. It was a great success." For his next project, de Vries is researching how electricity can be generated whenever someone pees into one of his GreenPees. [CNN, 8/21/2020]

Beliefs

Nguyen Van Chien, 92, from a village in the southern Mekong Delta in Vietnam, hasn't had a haircut in almost 80 years. A follower of Dua, a religion banned in Vietnam, Chien believes he has been called to grow his hair, Reuters reported, and his dreadlocks now measure about 16 1/2 feet. "I believe if I cut my hair I will die," Chien said. "I only nurture it, cover it in a scarf to keep it dry and clean and looking nice." [Reuters, 8/25/2020]

Great Art!

-- Three years ago, Emma Aldenryd, 18, of Aarhus, Denmark, discovered she had a rare condition called dermatographia, which causes her skin to temporarily swell up when touched. Oddity Central reports that the teen has decided to use her skin as a canvas on which she traces artwork with a pencil and posts the images to Instagram. "I started by drawing quite random stuff like a bunch of words," Aldenryd said. "Lots of people question whether it hurts, but my dermatographia has never hurt." Antihistamines treat the itch associated with her condition -- but they also stop the swelling, so she doesn't take them. [Oddity Central, 8/24/2020]

-- Drivers on U.S. 70 in southeast New Mexico have wondered about the 18 wooden chairs set up six feet apart in rows on a hill between Clovis and Portales. KRQE reports they are the work of three local sisters who wanted to express their feelings about socially distanced learning as schools struggle to open. "I have a daughter that's a teacher and both my sisters have kids who are in school and this is really, really difficult for them not to be in school," said Alyssa Idsinga, who created the art installation along with April Rutter and Abigail Pritchett. "It's just so lonely." She had the chairs in a shed and said the installation would remain as long as the pandemic continues or until the weather destroys it. [KRQE, 8/27/2020]

Compelling Explanation

Nicole Dozois, 40, was arrested in Largo, Florida, on Aug. 23 on charges of domestic battery after allegedly attacking her father "due to his flatulence," according to an arrest affidavit. The Smoking Gun reported that Dozois, who shares a room in a home in Largo with her 59-year-old father, allegedly punched him in the face numerous times, leaving him with a "bloodied left eye and scratches all over his neck," authorities said. She pleaded not guilty before being released, with the proviso that she have no contact with her father. [Smoking Gun, 8/24/2020]

Wait, What?

Villas Las Estrellas is a small settlement of about 100 people on King George Island in Antarctica with a school, a bank, a church and even a souvenir shop, but if you want to live there, you and your family -- including your children -- will be required to have your appendixes removed before you arrive. The reason, Medium reports, has a logic grounded in history: The town has a small clinic, but not always a surgeon, and the nearest hospital is more than 600 miles away and difficult to reach. In 1961, Russian explorer and surgeon Leonid Rogozov at the similarly isolated Novolazarevskaya Station suffered life-threatening acute appendicitis and was forced to operate on himself -- without anesthesia. The two-hour operation was successful, and Rogozov returned to work two weeks later. [Medium, 8/22/2020]

The Continuing Crisis

Dr. Devainder Goli, was watching a movie on his phone as his Tesla drove on autopilot near Spring Hope, North Carolina, early on Aug. 26, according to authorities, before narrowly missing a Nash County Sheriff's deputy and a State Highway Patrol trooper and crashing instead into both of their cruisers. "It could have been very horrific," Nash County Sheriff Keith Stone told WRAL. The officers were conducting an overnight lane closure at the time of the accident. Goli was charged with a moving violation. "We need to understand that automation cannot do everything," Stone said. [WRAL, 8/26/2020]

Nuts!

Detectives with the Tulare County (California) Sheriff's Office arrested Bhavna Singh Sekon, 23, of Fresno, in late August on suspicion of involvement in an "elaborate" scheme to steal and sell pistachios, to the tune of almost $300,000. According to YourCentralValley.com, detectives were called to Setton Pistachio on Aug. 14 where employees reported someone using the name of a legitimate trucking company had picked up two tractor-trailer loads of pistachios but failed to deliver them. Sheriff's department spokeswoman Ashley Ritchie said detectives discovered the thieves had also stolen the trailers, which were equipped with GPS that allowed authorities to track them down. Sekon was charged with grand theft, looting, identity theft and conspiracy. [YourCentralValley.com, 8/27/2020]

Mother Tongue

The Scots Wikipedia is the world's largest open-access compendium of the Scots language, which has been enjoying something of a comeback recently, according to The Guardian, but controversy has arisen since it was revealed that a teenager from North Carolina, who does not speak Scots, is responsible for creating or editing nearly half the entries. Responding to the criticism, the unidentified 19-year-old expressed remorse "after years of my thinking I was doing good. I was only a 12-year-old kid when I started." [The Guardian, 8/26/2020]

Entrepreneurial Spirit

Paul Derham of Dorset, on the southwest coast of England, worked on cruise ships all over the world for 27 years before settling down and taking over two local ferries in Mudeford. As he has gazed out to the English Channel recently, he's seen some of the world's most famous cruise ships, moored and sidelined by the coronavirus pandemic, and he hit upon an idea: using his ferries to conduct tours around the huge, empty vessels. Ghost Cruise Tours offers 2 1/2-hour trips to a socially distanced 30 passengers at a time, and has become a hit. "I am completely overwhelmed with the attention," Derham told CNN Travel. He plans to run the tours through the fall as long as the weather holds out. [CNN Travel, 8/31/2020]

The U.S. Geological Survey recorded a 5.1-magnitude earthquake in Alleghany County, North Carolina, on Sunday, Aug. 9, at 8:07 a.m., about the same time parishioners at St. Gabriel Catholic Church in Charlotte, 100 miles to the south, gathered at Mass and heard this among the morning's Bible readings: "After the wind there was an earthquake -- but the Lord was not in the earthquake." Father Richard Sutter, pastor at St. Gabriel, later told The Charlotte Observer he didn't feel the rumble himself, but several worshippers approached him after the outdoor service to share the "God-incidence." Father Cory Catron, closer to the epicenter near Sparta, also felt the quake and said it made for "good homily material." As his services ended later that morning, an aftershock rattled his church. [Charlotte Observer, 8/10/2020]

The Mother of Invention

As wildfires tore through parts of California on Aug. 19, Chad Little of Vacaville and his family prepared to evacuate, but Little changed his mind and decided to stay, he told KCRA. The family is in the process of rebuilding the home they lost five years ago in an attic fire, and "I can't let it go," he said. Little had hoses ready, but when the electricity went out, the water was cut off, so he grabbed a rake to clear away dry grass. As his cars and then his shop began to catch fire, he reached for the only liquid he had -- cans of Bud Light, shaking and spraying them at the fire, dousing the flames just before firefighters arrived. "My buddies all tease me about drinking water-beer," he said. "I say, 'Hey, it saved my shop.'" He also managed to save his home. [KCRA, 8/21/2020]

Rude

Sonja Lee has been struggling to make rent on her Houston apartment since losing her job in March, and has talked with her landlord about payment arrangements, but on Aug. 17, she received an eviction notice in the form of a piece of paper taped to her door that read, "Guess who's moving? You!!!" accompanied by a smiley face emoji and a demand to turn in her keys by 6 o'clock that night. "So y'all think it's funny," Lee told ABC 13 News. "There was nothing funny about that." The apartment complex owner said the manager has been disciplined and has apologized. [ABC 13 News, 8/20/2020]

Questionable Judgment

Balladeer James Blunt recently revealed that early in his college years at the University of Bristol, he adopted a completely carnivorous diet in order to prove his manliness, according to Men's Health. "I just lived on mince, some chicken, maybe with some mayonnaise, and it took me about six to eight weeks to get very, very unhealthy and see a doctor, who said, 'I think you've got the symptoms of scurvy,'" he confessed in a podcast. In response, Blunt tried to reverse the vitamin C deficiency that causes scurvy by drinking a liter of orange juice every night, which caused him to develop acid reflux. "So as you can see, yeah, food is not necessarily my forte." [Men's Health, 8/20/2020]

Government in Action

Kelly Eroglu in Cwmbran, Wales, was disappointed when her petition to open a coffee shop catering to bicyclists, and including parking spaces for bikes, was turned down by the local planning board because it lacked sufficient parking for cars. "It's crazy," Eroglu told The Guardian in mid-August, "because the Welsh government have prioritized (about $450 million) to improve walking and cycling within Wales." Eroglu is planning to appeal. "No way am I giving up," she said. [The Guardian, 8/20/2020]

News You Can Use

Police in Brockville, Ontario, Canada, say a homeowner ignored a warning from his pet parrot on Aug. 17 because the bird "isn't always a reliable source of information," CTV reported. As a thief entered the home through an unlocked door, authorities said, the parrot issued a friendly "hello," which didn't alert the homeowner or deter the man from taking a credit card from a wallet. A neighbor photographed the suspect leaving the scene and security cameras later caught a 33-year-old man using the stolen card at a store, said police, who arrested him. [CTV, 8/20/2020]

Least Competent Criminals

-- Herbert McClellan, 27, took advantage of a distracted clerk at a Speedway gas station in Clearwater, Florida, on Aug. 18 to snatch about $100 worth of scratch-off lottery tickets, according to police, who were alerted by store employees a few hours later when McClellan returned to the store to claim the $30 prize offered by one of the tickets. Fox13 reported McClellan was charged with petit theft and dealing in stolen property. [Fox13, 8/21/2020]

-- Police in Hollywood, Florida, had little trouble tracking down a trio of thieves who broke into nearly 30 homes, stealing more than $150,000 in cash, weapons, mobile phones, electronics, jewelry, a vehicle and more, because all three were "already on pretrial release for previous crimes and ... wearing court-ordered GPS ankle bracelet monitors," Officer Christian Lata said. The South Florida Sun-Sentinel reported Zion Odain Denvor Hall, 21; Tyrek Davontae Williams, 19; and Tremaine Raekwon Hill, 18, were arrested on Aug. 14 and charged with charged with burglary, grand theft and racketeering. Police believe they're part of a larger organization committing criminal acts throughout South Florida. Additional charges are to come. [South Florida Sun-Sentinel, 8/18/2020]

Awesome

Competition is stiff this year for the New Zealander of the year award, The Guardian reported on Aug. 19, but one candidate has garnered surprising attention: a Turkish Angora cat named Mittens who roams Wellington and has already received the key to the city. "In this extraordinary year, we know that everyone has a hero," said Miriama Kamo, the patron of the award, and for many it's Mittens, who has 50,000 followers on Facebook. New Zealand Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern and Dr. Ashley Bloomfield, the country's director-general of health, are also in the running. [The Guardian, 8/19/2020]

Yikes!

Workers at the James H. Cole funeral home in Detroit got a start when a body they were about to begin embalming came to life, the Associated Press reported. On Aug. 23, fire department paramedics in suburban Southfield were called to a home where they found 20-year-old Timesha Beauchamp unresponsive. After trying to resuscitate her for a half-hour, they consulted an ER doctor, who "pronounced the patient deceased based upon medical information provided" from the scene, according to the fire department. She was transported to the funeral home where, more than an hour later, she opened her eyes, and staff summoned emergency crews to take her to a hospital, where she was listed in critical condition. [Associated Press, 8/25/2020]

Inexplicable

Kirk Mathes of Barre, New York, returned to his farm from out of town to find a large safe on his property with a note attached saying whoever opened the safe could have the contents. Mathes told WHAM the safe has attracted so much attention that local deputies had to shoo away a large crowd trying to break it open with sledgehammers on Aug. 13. For now, he has moved the safe to one of his barns (he estimates it weighs 500 to 600 pounds), but he has no interest in seeing what's inside. "If you open it, the show is over. In these times ... it might get people a chance to ... have a lot of fun talking about it," Mathes said. "My personal feeling is, leave it as a mystery." [WHAM, 8/19/2020]