News of the Weird by the Editors at Andrews McMeel Syndication

LEAD STORY -- Questionable Judgment

On May 1, officials in San Diego County ordered residents to start wearing face coverings while in public to prevent the spread of COVID-19. On May 2, an unnamed man went grocery shopping at Vons in Santee, California, where a number of shoppers took photos of the man, wearing a Ku Klux Klan hood. Staff members repeatedly asked him to remove the hood, according to a company spokeswoman, but he refused until he reached the checkout area, where a supervisor caught up to him. The man removed the hood, paid for his groceries and left. Santee Mayor John Minto told the Los Angeles Times, "Santee, its leaders and I will not tolerate such behavior." [Los Angeles Times, 5/4/2020]

The Passing Parade

Virginia Hamilton, 69, was charged with felonious assault in Youngstown, Ohio, on May 3 after an altercation with her live-in boyfriend. According to WKBN, the boyfriend told police she became upset about his dirty underwear in the "laundry bucket" and grabbed a butcher knife; he tried to fight back with a pocket knife he had on hand. When officers arrived, Hamilton was on the front porch, washing blood off her hands, and the boyfriend was lying on a bed inside, covered in blood, with cuts on his arms and hands. The police report also noted that alcohol was involved. Ya think? [WKBN, 5/4/2020]

Creative Quarantine

Discovery Island at Disney World in Orlando, Florida, has been closed to the public since 1999, and, of course, the park itself has been closed since mid-March because of coronavirus concerns. Once called Treasure Island, the 11-acre property sits in the park's Bay Lake and was a pure "tropical paradise" for an unnamed interloper from Alabama, who was found camping on the island on April 30 by park security. NPR reported the 42-year-old man told Orange County Sheriff's deputies he was planning to stay about a week and was unaware he was doing anything wrong, despite numerous "no trespassing" signs and calls from authorities over loudspeakers. Nevertheless, he was charged with trespassing and was banned from all Disney properties. [NPR, 5/3/2020]


Two landscapers were charged with DUIs for driving the same vehicle at the same time in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, after police pulled over an SUV that had been reported to be driving recklessly on April 15. According to police reports, the officers spotted Alfredo Lopez Chaj, 24, behind the wheel, but by the time an officer approached the car, Chaj was standing outside it, and Martin Lopez Chaj, 20, was in the driver's seat. The younger man, apparently a brother, had slid over from the passenger seat, put the car in gear and tried to escape, but the officer pulled him out of the car, The Palm Beach Post reported. Both men, police noted, smelled of alcohol, and both had wet their pants; neither had a valid driver's license. [Palm Beach Post, 4/17/2020]


A Utah Highway Patrol officer pulled over a car in Weber County on May 4 for "what he thought was an impaired driver," the highway patrol said on Twitter, but instead he was shocked to find a 5-year-old in the driver's seat. The boy told the trooper he took off in his parents' car after arguing with his mother because she wouldn't buy him a Lamborghini, according to United Press International. He planned to drive to California to get one for himself, but alas, "he only had $3 his wallet," the highway patrol noted. [UPI, 5/5/2020]

Animal Antics

A monkey riding a small motorized bicycle in a street performance in Surabaya, Indonesia, on May 2, threw down the bike and suddenly grabbed a toddler who was watching, Global News reported, dragging the child down the cobblestone street for several feet before letting him go. The boy was scratched but not seriously injured. [Global News, 5/4/2020]

Wait, What?

-- Katrina Morgan, 50, called 911 on May 2 in Port Clinton, Ohio, asking for the fire department because, "I need somebody to come put it out with their hose," according to police reports. "It" was her crotch, she told the dispatcher, and it was on fire. The News Herald reported that police responding to her call arrested Morgan for making false reports and disrupting public services, and found empty bottles of alcohol in the house. Other people at the home admitted they'd been drinking but said they didn't see her using the telephone. [Port Clinton News Herald, 5/5/2020]

-- An advertisement for a deodorant that aired during "Britain's Got Talent" on May 2 caused a backlash among viewers who were shocked to see the ad conclude with a squirrel "getting it on" with a can of the deodorant, as one angry viewer put it. "We are watching this as a family," wrote one complainant, according to The Independent, while others noted the ad celebrating Lynx Africa's 25th anniversary was "inappropriately scheduled" and "unsuitable for children." The Advertising Standards Authority received 155 complaints about the ad, but said, "No decision has been made on whether there are grounds for an investigation." [The Independent, 5/6/2020]


Nursery school teacher Eloise Roberts, 32, has been making videos for her students during the coronavirus lockdown, and recently decided to take advantage of a lovely spring day to record a story about unicorns at the horse riding school in Moreton, Merseyside, England, where she lives. What she didn't expect was the springtime friskiness of the horses in the background. "I could hear that the horses were up to something behind me," Roberts told the Daily Mail, so she turned around to discover the more compelling story happening behind her, and quickly moved to another field. [Daily Mail, 4/22/2020]

Bright Idea

Officials in Lund, Sweden, were concerned about people spreading coronavirus in the town's central park as they gathered for Walpurgis Night on April 30, a traditional celebration welcoming longer, warmer days that includes picnics and bonfires. So to discourage revelers, the town spread chicken manure all over the park. "This is a park where usually 30,000 people gather, but with COVID-19, this is now unthinkable," Mayor Philip Sandberg told Reuters. "We don't want Lund to become an epicenter for the spread of the disease. Even a small number of people still going to the park can become a big risk." [Reuters, 4/30/2020]

Least Competent Criminals

Before Quintin Henderson, 28, was released from Illinois' Cook County Jail on May 2, he made a deal with fellow inmate Jahquez Scott, 21. The Chicago Sun-Times reported that Scott promised Henderson $1,000 for letting Scott assume his identity, according to jail authorities, and when Henderson's name was called, Scott stepped up, face mask in place, signed a few papers and walked away. It was when Henderson approached staff members a little while later and said he'd fallen asleep that officers realized there'd been a switch. Henderson, who was supposed to be released, is now being held on charges of aiding and abetting the escape of a felon, and Scott is still on the run. [Chicago Sun-Times, 5/5/2020]

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