DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a professional writer, struggling to sell my books and make a small margin of profit. Several of my close friends have purchased my book and all have given glowing reviews. Then, often, they say to me: “I am going to lend this book to all my friends in my women’s club,” or “at my church,” or whatever.
How can I tactfully say that I am flattered, but that I would prefer they ask their friends to buy the book, rather than to share my hard work without further compensation to me? If I were an actress, they would not say, “We loved your performance and we’re sneaking all our friends in, free of charge.”
GENTLE READER: True, but you also do not wish to discourage an even more valuable seller: word of mouth. Presumably those few copies of your book will eventually run out. Miss Manners suggests that you say something like, “Thank you so much for recommending it. Here’s hoping your friends will encourage their friends to buy it, so they don’t wear out your only copy.”