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Miss Manners by Judith Martin, Nicholas Ivor Martin and Jacobina Martin

Gender Shouldn't Be a Factor in Deciding Who Pays

DEAR MISS MANNERS: If a female invites a male to a prom, is she responsible for the expenses? Or what is the male responsible for?

GENTLE READER: The young gentleman is responsible for showing up and showing his hostess a pleasant time. If flowers are customarily given at the prom, it would be gracious of him to offer them.

Miss Manners considers this to be an excellent opportunity to learn about reciprocal hospitality and what it is to be a hostess. Her social life will be a lot more pleasant if she gets rid of the idea that it is gender that decides who pays, rather than the person issuing the invitation.

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