DEAR HARRIETTE: My son moved away a couple of months ago. At the time, he told me that he was able to transfer his job, which would make the move that much more seamless. Last week, he called me to tell me that his employment contract will terminate in the next few weeks. I asked him where this was coming from, and he admitted that he knew all along that this was one of the conditions of his temporary office transfer. This is all news to me. He says he’s been applying and interviewing a ton, but he still hasn’t secured a new job.

My son has asked whether I’d be willing to help him with living expenses if things don’t change in the next few weeks. I can’t tell if I’m upset because he was dishonest or because I think the move was a poor decision. I want him to realize that he can’t always use me as a safety net. I want him to grow up, be more responsible and start making wiser, more thorough decisions. Should I let him fend for himself so he can learn a lesson in adulthood? Is there a way to help him and get through to him? -- Safety Net

DEAR SAFETY NET: Have a direct conversation with your son. Let him know how disappointed you are that he was dishonest with you -- and ultimately with himself. Point out that he is at the age where he needs to be able to take care of himself. Give him either a timeline or a set amount of money that you will give him before you intend to stop. (A timeline is probably better for someone who is not disciplined about money.) Tell him he has to figure out his life by then or learn how to fend for himself without you as his fallback.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m in a committed relationship, but recently, I’ve found myself questioning where the line is between harmless flirting and cheating. I haven’t physically crossed any boundaries, but there’s someone at work I have easy chemistry with. We joke, tease and sometimes exchange lingering looks or playful comments. It feels energizing, and part of me enjoys the attention, even though I would never act on it.

My partner doesn’t know about these interactions, and that’s what makes me a bit worried. I’ve started wondering whether the secrecy itself means I’m already doing something wrong. At the same time, I don’t feel like I should have to shut down every spark of connection just because I’m in a relationship. I don’t want to hurt my partner or jeopardize what we’ve built, but I also don’t want to over-police my own behavior. How do I define reasonable boundaries for myself without depriving myself of human connection while still respecting the integrity of my relationship? -- Flirting or Cheating

DEAR FLIRTING OR CHEATING: The fact that you have given this much thought to it means that whatever you are doing with this co-worker is more than a meaningless flirtation. Step back and analyze the situation. What are you possibly missing at home that you derive from this co-worker? Is there a way for you to channel the energy that seems so “easy” back to your partner at home so that you focus any type of intimacy on that bond? Let this flirtation draw you back into your partnership. Then it will have served some good.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: A close friend has expressed romantic interest in me. We’ve been in the same friend group for about eight years now. In recent years, I had suspected there was a bit of chemistry between us, but I always denied it to myself and to my girlfriends when they would ask about it. Recently, this friend admitted his feelings and proposed a weekend getaway as our first date. I can’t deny that I am moved by his choice to reveal his feelings -- even if it means risking our friendship. I’m flattered, and quite frankly I’m blushing!

I’m interested in this man, and I’m curious about what a deeper relationship might look like for us, but I held in my own feelings this long because I wanted to preserve the beautiful friendship we have. A getaway is spontaneous, and I’m a bit nervous, but honestly, I’m always nervous. Should I take the leap and go away with him, or should I maintain what we have? -- More Than Friends

DEAR MORE THAN FRIENDS: Why not take the leap and go with him for the weekend? Spend the time talking and exploring your thoughts and feelings. Agree to give each other the space to discover if it’s worth it to find out if a romance could emerge out of your friendship.

You can also agree to be respectful of each other and the rest of your friend group by treating this time as special. Don’t rush into intimacy. Take your time and see how things evolve.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A colleague of mine sent me an alarming article and suggested that I check in on my best friend. When I read the article, I found out that my friend’s partner had been arrested. The article was several months old, and since then, I have been to her home and out to dinners with her and her husband. My friend hasn’t mentioned any of this to me, so is it that she doesn’t want me to know or perhaps that she doesn’t know herself?

Now that I have this information, I want to check on her and let her know that I am here for her even when things are difficult. Is there a way to bring this up that won’t cause her to be defensive, or is it best to pretend I never read this article and butt out of their personal life? -- Sticking My Nose In

DEAR STICKING MY NOSE IN: If this woman is truly your best friend, she obviously chose not to share the information with you. You will be breaching an invisible wall by bringing it up. If you think your friend could benefit from moral support simply by knowing that you are aware of something that happened, discreetly inform her that someone showed you the article. Assure her that you are not fishing for details, but you want her to know that you will do whatever she needs you to do to support her. That could be talking, helping her find an attorney or doing nothing at all.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a wife and mom, and I work full-time, which means my days are busy from the moment I wake up until I close my eyes at night. With getting my kids ready in the morning, working all day, handling dinner, helping with homework and household responsibilities, it feels like every minute of my life belongs to someone else. For 2026, I set a goal to start running. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for years -- not to train for a marathon or change how I look, but simply to have something that’s just for me and to feel healthier and to have more energy. The problem is, I genuinely don’t know where to fit it in. Early mornings feel impossible because I’m already exhausted, and evenings are filled with family obligations and more exhaustion. Once I have a moment, all I want to do is rest.

I’m frustrated because this goal feels small yet completely out of reach. I don’t want to give up on myself, but I also don’t want to feel selfish or unrealistic. How can I make time for running without feeling like I’m neglecting my family, my job or my responsibilities? -- Can’t Run

DEAR CAN’T RUN: It’s time to talk to your spouse. You need help managing your responsibilities. Ask for it. Either get your spouse to handle some of the family obligations so that you can take a run in the morning or the evening, or find it in the budget to hire a babysitter or some other kind of helper to let you take time for yourself.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son recently got kicked out of his college for going against the academic integrity policy. I was so disappointed in him when he told me what happened. I raised him to value honesty and hard work, so this feels like a failure not only on his part, but somehow on mine as well. He insists that he knows he made a mistake by cheating and didn’t think it would lead to such serious consequences, but the school was strict with their decision, and he is no longer allowed to enroll there.

I’m struggling with how to handle this as a parent. Part of me wants to step in, call the school and do whatever I can to fix the situation or appeal the decision. Another part of me feels like shielding him from the consequences would teach him that someone will always clean up his messes. He’s embarrassed, withdrawn and unsure of what to do next, and I worry about how this setback will affect his confidence and future opportunities. He wants to apply to another college, but he doesn’t know if he will get in. How do I support my son through this failure while still holding him accountable for his actions? -- Next Steps

DEAR NEXT STEPS: Help your son to accept what happened and move forward. His actions got him thrown out of his school. Encourage him to apply to another school, perhaps starting at the community college level and building up from there. Only by facing his life can he define a way forward. You can cheer him on, but don’t try to do it for him. It won’t work.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)