DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m confused and honestly a little heartbroken. My sister and I grew up incredibly close -- practically joined at the hip. We talked every day and leaned on each other for everything, and I always felt like no matter what changed around us, we would stay the same. Ever since I moved away for a new job a few months ago, it feels like our connection has evaporated. I’m the one constantly reaching out, and she’ll respond days later with short replies or not at all. When I visited home recently, she seemed warm enough in person, but once I left, the distance snapped right back. I can’t tell if she’s upset with me, overwhelmed with her own life or if the move made her rethink our closeness. It hurts to feel shut out without understanding why. I don’t want to pressure her, but I also don’t want to ignore what feels like a growing rift. How do I address this without pushing her even further away? -- Missing My Sister

DEAR MISSING MY SISTER: Since you are the one who moved, chances are, your sister feels abandoned by you. In her mind, it could be that she sees your act of independence as leaving her behind. This may not be a conscious thought on her part, but when a family member leaves home, those left behind can feel loneliness and grief.

Don’t let any more time pass before you speak to your sister about this. Reach out and tell her how much you miss her and your closeness. Express your concern that you feel emotional distance between you and that you want to be in closer communication. Ask her if anything is bothering her. Find out if she is angry with you or hurt. Assure her that you love her just as much as before, even though you don’t live together anymore. Invite her to resume your close connection.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m in a tricky spot with my girlfriend, and I’m not sure how to handle it without causing friction. We live together and generally have a great relationship, but she recently asked me to cosign on a new car with her. The request made me uncomfortable. I care about her deeply, but taking on someone else’s debt -- even someone I love -- feels like a huge risk. I’ve worked hard to protect my own credit, and the idea of being on the hook for a car that isn’t mine stresses me out. When I tried to express my hesitation, she acted hurt and suggested it meant I didn’t trust her. That’s not true at all. I’m more than willing to help her build her credit in other ways, but I don’t want to feel pressured or guilted into taking on a financial responsibility that doesn’t feel right for me. How do I set this boundary without damaging our relationship? -- Cosign for Love

DEAR COSIGN FOR LOVE: Maybe now is the time to talk about relationships and finances. Talk about the future and what you each want for your life. Share your credit reports and review how you spend money. What are your savings and investments today, and what are your plans for the years to come? Get into a serious conversation about money. In that context, discuss cosigning and why that is a huge step for you that you do not take lightly. Come to a consensus together.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who is an immigrant, and he has been out of work for nearly two years. He has cobbled together enough money to scrape by, but if he doesn’t find a job soon, I worry that he will lose his apartment. He has a few close friends, myself included, who have helped him whenever we can, but it’s getting to be too much. I, for one, have a family and am working hard to make sure we have enough resources to take care of each other. I feel horrible, but I can’t continue to finance my friend. I have told him about the SNAP program and other social services that can help him, but he’s too proud to look into it. Honestly, I’m not sure if he is even eligible, but I do know that it’s foolish to let pride keep you from trying to get the help you need. What can I do for him now that I can’t continue to support him financially? -- Friend in Crisis

DEAR FRIEND IN CRISIS: I’m so sorry for your friend. Sadly, there are many people today who are suffering. Talk to your friend one more time very plainly. Tell him you cannot afford to continue your financial support, but you are worried about him and think he should investigate government aid. The truth is, though, restrictions on who can receive SNAP benefits and Medicaid have tightened for immigrants. If your friend has a valid green card, he should be eligible. Suggest that he reconsider applying for that support -- for now. He doesn’t have to use it forever, but it is there to help people when they are in need.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just got a huge promotion at my job. They are doing a major reorganization, and somehow they have decided that I should have an important role in the restructuring. I am thrilled as I have worked overtime many hours to pitch in whenever needed and I have offered ideas, some of which they have used.

The problem is that many of my friends on the job are either not changing their roles at all or are being phased out. I want to celebrate my new title and pay increase, but I think it would be insensitive to do so around my friends who are currently worried if they will even have their jobs next year. What should I do? I don’t want to hide my good fortune, but I don’t want to rub it in anyone’s face either. -- Quiet Promotion

DEAR QUIET PROMOTION: First of all, congratulations on surviving and thriving during this time of financial hardship for many. It sounds like you have been resourceful and flexible, and you are being rewarded for it. You are smart to consider the optics of letting the world know your good fortune. Unless your boss is encouraging you to announce your promotion, now is the time to keep that to yourself. Do your job with your head up. Be aware of what’s happening in your friends’ lives. Be humble.

You can and should go to dinner or drinks with family and/or friends outside of your job. Don’t post your celebration on social media, though. Ask your friends to do the same.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I want to take a vacation with my best friend, but I don’t have the money to do so right now, and I feel incredibly embarrassed about it. We typically take a trip together every year, and it’s something we both look forward to because it helps us reconnect and make memories. This year, however, everything is different: I lost my job a few months ago and had to take another job that pays a lot less just to stay afloat.

I’ve been avoiding the vacation conversation because I don’t want her to think I’m unreliable or that I don’t care about our tradition. The truth is, I’m barely keeping up with my bills, and a vacation just isn’t possible. I’m worried she’ll be disappointed or think less of me. I’ve even thought about trying to put the trip on a credit card, but I know that would make my situation worse.

I’m torn between being honest with my friend and trying to save face. I keep practicing the conversation in my head, but every version makes me embarrassed. I want to handle this in a way that protects both our friendship and my dignity. How should I tell my friend that I can’t go on a trip this year? -- No Vacay

DEAR NO VACAY: If your friend truly is your “best friend,” she should understand. Tell her the truth: This has been a tough year for many people, including you. Your friend needs to know right away that you cannot take the trip. This will give her a chance to change her plans. Admit that you are embarrassed and disappointed in your circumstances right now. Obviously, you wanted to honor your tradition, but you have to pass this year. The end.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I need a new job. I have been working hard at my current job for several years now, but I am grossly underpaid. I know that my company is suffering due to the impact of the tariffs and what they are calling “DEI cutbacks,” but the reality is that my salary is low but the work remains intense. I need to make more money -- and fast. Don’t get me wrong: I love what we do, but I need more income in order to survive. I also love my boss and know he’s trying his best, but it’s just not enough. What should I do? -- Ready To Quit

DEAR READY TO QUIT: For many companies, this year has been a challenge financially. Yes, the new policies that have been put in place by the federal government have impacted many businesses, the fallout of that is not fully known yet. Does that mean you should leave your job? You certainly can look around to see if there are more lucrative opportunities, but do so discreetly and with care. I believe in abundance, which fundamentally means that there is enough to go around for everyone. It’s not always easy to find, though. Is there any way that you can help the company where you currently work differently so that they can get back on their feet? At the same time, keep your eyes open for part-time supplementary work as well as companies that may be more financially secure and able to pay a healthier wage.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)