DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like my 8-year-old son doesn’t listen to me unless I raise my voice. I hate that yelling has become our norm. It leaves me feeling frustrated and guilty, and I know it’s probably affecting him too. Small things like getting dressed, brushing teeth or cleaning up toys can turn into a major confrontation, and I end up yelling just to get him to comply. I’ve tried reasoning calmly, offering choices and even giving rewards, but nothing seems to work consistently.

I want to be a parent who sets boundaries and enforces rules without constantly raising my voice, but I’m not sure how to regain authority in a calmer, more positive way. I worry that if this continues, our relationship could become strained or resentful over time. I want him to respect me without feeling like our home is a battlefield. How do I break this cycle before it becomes permanent, and help both of us feel more connected and less stressed? -- Seeking Peace

DEAR SEEKING PEACE: Get up early and do something to ground yourself. Do stretches, deep breathing, meditation or anything that engages your physical body and instills calm. Decide that you are going to be positive in all of your interactions with your son.

With a smile and clear conviction, greet your son warmly and invite him to begin his day with a calming exercise. Teach him some stretches, and do them together. Show him how to start off focused. Tell him what time you want him to come for breakfast. Remind him of what you need him to do, and leave.

When it’s time to eat, call him but don’t inspect. Let him have agency. Later, check to see which of his chores he did, if any, but don’t address it then. When he comes home from school, before he can play, invite him to complete any unfinished tasks. If he doesn’t do them, remind him. This is the time to take away treats -- like TV and video games -- without raising your voice. Become pleasant, quiet and resolute as you consistently enforce consequences. He will notice your change in behavior and test you. Stay strong.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I suspect that a friend of mine might be taking weight-loss supplements. She’s mentioned an interest in doing so before but has never confirmed that she started any particular regimen. She’s been losing weight rapidly over the last couple of months, and now she’s beginning to look unhealthy. If she’s not taking any supplements, then I’ll be even more concerned!

I want to be supportive if my friend is seeking to lose weight or build a healthier lifestyle, but I don’t want to encourage habits that put her physical or mental health and well-being at risk. I just don’t know how to show my love, care and support without prying or even coming off as judgmental. How can I share my concerns with my friend when she hasn’t brought up her weight or health in a long time? -- Health Concerns

DEAR HEALTH CONCERNS: Tell your friend that you have noticed that she has lost a lot of weight. Ask her what method she is using. Encourage her to check in with her doctor to make sure she is following proper protocols. Tell her you are happy for her but a little concerned that the weight loss has been so rapid. Remind her that you love her and want the best for her. The rest is up to her.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently matched with someone on a dating app, and after chatting for a bit, we realized we work at the same company. It’s a huge organization, so we had never crossed paths before -- until, of course, we suddenly started running into each other in the office after matching. We never acknowledged it directly, and since then, things have felt a little awkward. It’s not like anything inappropriate happened between us. We just exchanged a few friendly messages before things fizzled out, but now every hallway run-in feels tense. I can’t tell if he’s pretending it never happened or if he’s just as unsure as I am about how to act.

Part of me wants to laugh it off and break the ice, but another part worries that it might make things even weirder. I’ve caught myself overthinking what to say when I see him and wondering if other co-workers have picked up on the tension. It’s gotten to the point where I sometimes take a different route to avoid the awkwardness altogether. Should I bring it up to clear the air or just keep acting like nothing happened and hope the awkwardness fades on its own? -- Unmatched

DEAR UNMATCHED: Be the adult in the room. Next time you see this man, walk up to him and discreetly address the obvious. You can start with humor. Yes, it is uncanny that the two of you would meet online and end up working in the same place, but it doesn’t need to be awkward. You didn’t end up hooking up. It was innocent enough, and now it’s over. Agree to stop dodging each other in the building, be cordial and move on.

DEAR HARRIETTE: This year has been stressful for me. I lost my job and have used most of my savings just to survive. I haven’t talked about my situation much at all. It’s frustrating enough to live it without the embarrassment of admitting that, at 40 years old, my great career ended because of no fault of my own. I suddenly became seen as a DEI hire even though my job had nothing to do with diversity. I feel deflated and scared. I’ve been looking for work but can’t find anything, and I’m worried about what to do next. -- Lost

DEAR LOST: Sadly, there are hundreds of thousands of well-credentialed, hardworking people like you in this country who are recently out of work with seemingly nowhere to turn. Now is the time to talk to your friends and reach out to organizations that may be able to help you.

With friends, band together and help each other -- first by revealing your situation and then asking for help. Some people have formed meal collectives where they cook together and share the expenses of food. Others help with babysitting. Still others have provided shelter for newly unhoused former professionals.

On a different level, reach out to human rights organizations for help. The ACLU, for example, is looking to support people who feel they were wrongly dismissed. Drop the shame and speak up for yourself. Telling your story may be the way to save yourself and others like you.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently noticed that my partner still follows his ex on social media, and not only that, but he still likes most of her posts. They’ve been broken up for two years, and from what I know, she was the one who ended things. It’s not like he’s leaving flirty comments or anything inappropriate, but I can’t help but feel uneasy every time I see his name under her photos.

Part of me feels silly for even caring -- after all, everyone stays connected online these days -- but another part of me wonders why he’s still keeping up with her so closely. I haven’t said anything yet because I don’t want to come off as jealous or controlling, especially since everything else in our relationship feels solid, but it’s definitely bothering me more than I’d like to admit. I can’t tell if I’m overreacting or ignoring a red flag. I keep telling myself it’s “just social media,” but I also know how small habits can sometimes reveal bigger feelings. It’s starting to make me question whether he’s truly over that relationship or just hasn’t fully let go. Should I bring this up and risk sounding insecure, or just let it go and try to move on from it quietly? -- Tethered to Ex

DEAR TETHERED TO EX: How do you know this? Do you follow his ex on social? If you are aware of this because you have been snooping, trust that he will react to that energy. The larger question is: What is worrying you? If you sincerely wonder if he is over his ex, ask him. When he asks why, tell him you have seen how attentive he is to her social media. Be prepared for a bit of alarm from him as to your motives, but push for honest dialogue about their status.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been complaining about my husband incessantly, and for good reason. There is a long list of ways that he has messed up our life, but I’m starting to notice that I have my own stuff that needs to be addressed. He is not the only bad guy, in a way. How can I face up to my issues without creating vulnerability for me when I’m talking to him? Honestly, I don’t know if we can make it, and I don’t want to give him ammunition to make life more difficult for me if we do break up. -- On the Precipice

DEAR ON THE PRECIPICE: If you feel you are headed to divorce, talk to him about that directly. Put your cards on the table and begin to discuss a way to end your marriage and move on.

If you think there’s a chance you might stay together, tell him about your realization of your own shortcomings. Chances are, he is aware of them even if you two have never discussed them. By being forthcoming about what you now see you need to work on, you may be creating space for the two of you to work together on your marriage instead of pointing fingers.

Vulnerability is an essential part of growth. Being fully honest about yourself and each other may be the medicine you both need to address your issues and work toward finding a way forward. You married this man. Is your relationship worth making every effort to fight for your bond before you give up?

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)