DEAR HARRIETTE: I met a guy about a month ago in a bizarre way: We were riding the same subway car during an off-peak hour and kept locking eyes. He came over and sat with me, and we swapped a few stories. It was crazy but so sweet. He told me that he used to play sports overseas and is now back in New York City opening a restaurant. He invited me out to a food tasting as our first date, and we’ve been spending time together ever since. I ended up telling my friend about this new romance, and she thought it’d be interesting to Google him. At first it was funny, but then she found a family photo on his socials captioned “Superdad, father of 5.” I was shocked! We spoke about our families on our first date, and he told me that he has “a daughter.” I feel deceived and don’t know how to confront him since I found out by snooping. Should I ghost him, or is that immature? -- Superdad

DEAR SUPERDAD: First of all, I don’t consider it snooping to look up someone online. It is common practice and not the same thing as riffling through his phone or his belongings. You found “Superdad.” What else did you see on his socials? Is he also a husband? Look again to learn more about this man from his posts, and then absolutely speak to him about your discoveries. You can tell him the truth: You were telling a friend about him and the two of you looked him up. Express how surprised you were when you learned that he has five children even though he told you about only one.

Ask him to tell you who he is and why he thought it was necessary to hide the fact that he has five children from you. People have lives. Whatever is true about them is just that. You don’t need to ghost this man. Instead, find out who he is and if his values match yours. If they don’t, say goodbye.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I find myself in a tough situation. I have fallen for a guy who is in dire financial straits. This is so weird, as one of my biggest worries is not having enough money. I am an entrepreneur, and in recent years, my business has not been strong. What I thought I wanted most was a stable relationship with someone who has stable finances, so it’s nuts that I have fallen for this guy. I met him at one of my lowest points, and he was so kind to me. He sees me. Part of me wants to say I will give this a chance. Maybe together we can both get financially stronger, but maybe this is me being naive. How can I tell? -- Fallen

DEAR FALLEN: Have an honest conversation with this man. Tell him your concerns about your life and his. Admit that you really like him and want to see where things are headed, but you need to see both of you making headway toward financial stability. Ask him questions about his financial history, work life, etc. Find out his strengths and weaknesses as you share yours. Analyze whether being with him is worth the risk for your sanity -- and your wallet.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am living with my mom again for the first time in a long time. I am back in my hometown, and as I plan for what’s next, living with her seemed like the best idea. Boy, oh boy, was I wrong. Aside from occasional three-week-long visits during holidays, it’s been about eight years since my mom and I lived in the same space, and now I remember why. We have changed so much. She is particular about fridge organization, and no matter how hard I try to adhere to her shelf preferences and systems, I still manage to mess it up. Apparently, all of my showers are too long. She tries to correct the way I do my laundry, and she constantly questions me about my spending because she thinks I receive too many packages. I think we’re just going through an awkward phase readjusting to each other, but I don’t want this to continue. Any advice on how we can compromise? -- Mom’s House

DEAR MOM’S HOUSE: Ask your mom if you two can have a family meeting. Thank her for welcoming you home during this period of uncertainty. Make sure she knows how much you appreciate her generosity.

Tell her that the transition has been tough. As you’ve grown up, you have developed certain patterns of living, and she has her own. You feel like she is constantly judging and correcting you, and you do not feel comfortable. Ask her for some grace. Request specific concessions, like one shelf in the fridge to be yours. Get a P.O. box so that you don’t have to be under her scrutiny regarding packages. Do heed her warnings: Are you spending too much? Can you cut back? Are your showers wasting water? Remember that she loves you and wants the best for you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband is extremely passive-aggressive. He refuses to speak up for basic things at his work, yet he snipes at me about every little thing at home. He constantly curses under his breath about how somebody did him wrong, but when it’s time to speak up and defend himself, he’s quiet as a mouse. This is driving me nuts. When I recommend things for him to say or do to take better care of himself, he shrugs it off and is often mean to me. I’m at my wit’s end. I feel like I bear the brunt of his inability to speak up for himself. What can I do? -- Passive Husband

DEAR PASSIVE HUSBAND: You need to stand up for yourself. When your husband speaks to you in an unacceptable way, tell him to stop. In the moment, if possible, point out that he is yelling or being rude or disrespectful. You can even say, “Honey, I know you had a hard day today, but I need you not to take it out on me.” When he goes off about something, remind him in a quiet moment that it would be easier if he addressed the issue as it is happening rather than complaining about it after the fact.

Definitely recommend counseling. A therapist may be able to role-play with him so he can discover healthier ways to react to confrontation.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My parents are playing favorites with their grandchildren, and it’s becoming more obvious. My kids are starting to notice, and it absolutely breaks my heart. For example, my mom buys my sister’s children much more expensive gifts for birthdays and holidays, while my kids get smaller or less thoughtful presents. She also often invites my sister’s kids out to lunches, special outings or shopping trips, but rarely includes mine.

My children have started to ask why grandma doesn’t treat them the same, and I never know what to say without making my parents look bad. I don’t want to create a family conflict, but I also don’t want my kids growing up feeling less loved or less important than their cousins. Part of me wants to sit down and have an honest conversation with my parents about how this favoritism is affecting my family, but I’m scared it will make things worse. Should I confront my parents about this or let it go and find other ways to reassure my children that they are equally valued and loved? -- Playing Favorites

DEAR PLAYING FAVORITES: You should speak to your parents and point out your concerns. Tell them that your children have noticed that their grandparents do not treat all of the grandchildren the same, and their feelings are hurt. Ask them to be more mindful of how they treat all the children.

Be prepared to distract your children from their grandparents’ favoritism, though, as you have no control over it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been working in corporate America in finance for the past six years, and while I’ve learned a lot and grown professionally, I’ve always had an entrepreneurial spirit. I love the idea of creating something of my own, being my own boss and building a business that reflects my passions and values. The problem is that I have no clue where to start. I don’t know how to come up with a viable business idea, figure out funding or navigate all the logistics involved in launching a company. I’m also nervous about leaving the security of a steady paycheck and benefits, and I worry about failing or making mistakes that could set me back financially. At the same time, I feel like I’ve been putting this dream on hold for too long, and I don’t want to regret never taking the leap. How do I begin exploring entrepreneurship when I have so many questions and fears? What are the first steps I should take to turn my dream into a reality? -- Dreaming

DEAR DREAMING: I want to push back a bit and ask you: What exactly is your dream? What you describe is a vague desire to have a business. In order to be a successful entrepreneur, you need to have a burning desire to do something specific. That fire inside then will drive you to figure out all of the details. To learn more about entrepreneurship, you can take a class or read books that describe what to do.

You may also want to consider pursuing a hobby, volunteering or joining a not-for-profit board, something that expands your horizons but also allows you to stay in your corporate job. That could be great, too.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)