DEAR HARRIETTE: My parents are playing favorites with their grandchildren, and it’s becoming more obvious. My kids are starting to notice, and it absolutely breaks my heart. For example, my mom buys my sister’s children much more expensive gifts for birthdays and holidays, while my kids get smaller or less thoughtful presents. She also often invites my sister’s kids out to lunches, special outings or shopping trips, but rarely includes mine.

My children have started to ask why grandma doesn’t treat them the same, and I never know what to say without making my parents look bad. I don’t want to create a family conflict, but I also don’t want my kids growing up feeling less loved or less important than their cousins. Part of me wants to sit down and have an honest conversation with my parents about how this favoritism is affecting my family, but I’m scared it will make things worse. Should I confront my parents about this or let it go and find other ways to reassure my children that they are equally valued and loved? -- Playing Favorites

DEAR PLAYING FAVORITES: You should speak to your parents and point out your concerns. Tell them that your children have noticed that their grandparents do not treat all of the grandchildren the same, and their feelings are hurt. Ask them to be more mindful of how they treat all the children.

Be prepared to distract your children from their grandparents’ favoritism, though, as you have no control over it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been working in corporate America in finance for the past six years, and while I’ve learned a lot and grown professionally, I’ve always had an entrepreneurial spirit. I love the idea of creating something of my own, being my own boss and building a business that reflects my passions and values. The problem is that I have no clue where to start. I don’t know how to come up with a viable business idea, figure out funding or navigate all the logistics involved in launching a company. I’m also nervous about leaving the security of a steady paycheck and benefits, and I worry about failing or making mistakes that could set me back financially. At the same time, I feel like I’ve been putting this dream on hold for too long, and I don’t want to regret never taking the leap. How do I begin exploring entrepreneurship when I have so many questions and fears? What are the first steps I should take to turn my dream into a reality? -- Dreaming

DEAR DREAMING: I want to push back a bit and ask you: What exactly is your dream? What you describe is a vague desire to have a business. In order to be a successful entrepreneur, you need to have a burning desire to do something specific. That fire inside then will drive you to figure out all of the details. To learn more about entrepreneurship, you can take a class or read books that describe what to do.

You may also want to consider pursuing a hobby, volunteering or joining a not-for-profit board, something that expands your horizons but also allows you to stay in your corporate job. That could be great, too.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My “Uncle Ron” raised his son and daughter all alone, and I think it was a struggle for him. Over the years, he put affection on the back burner and became results-driven. He did his best to make sure his children were A students, hard-working, well-behaved, well-spoken and aligned for success. I think his rigid parenting style took a toll on his son, my cousin “Matt.” When Matt went away for college, he was no longer an A student. Although he managed to graduate, he struggled to find work afterward. Whenever we’re all together, Uncle Ron is judgmental and doesn’t shy away from sharing his disappointment in his kids. I can see how it affects my cousin, but I don’t know what to say to my uncle. I chime in sometimes to remind him that Matt is on his way and has a good job now, but nothing is good enough for my uncle. I want to get through to him, but he’s so stuck in his ways. How can I stop him from emotionally scarring my cousin further? -- Never Enough

DEAR NEVER ENOUGH: Your uncle may never listen, but you can try talking to him privately. Point out that you know how hard he worked to take care of his children to prepare them to become responsible adults. Note that you think he did a great job, and add that you have noticed how harshly he treats Matt and that it seems to be negatively affecting him. Give Uncle Ron the example of how he publicly berates his son about his shortcomings in front of the family and how uncomfortable and embarrassing that is. Suggest that he notice the positive things about his son and celebrate those a little more.

Your uncle may get angry with you, but at least you will have said it. Moreover, stay in touch with your cousin and be his peer cheerleader. He will appreciate that.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been struggling in my business all year due to losing several big contracts at the end of last year. I haven’t been bringing in the income I need to survive and pay my team, and I have depleted my savings; it’s a huge struggle. When I try to talk to my husband about it, he shrugs it off and tells me not to complain. He says if I talk about how bad things are, they will get worse. I think he’s wrong. We need to talk about reality and how we will move forward on significantly less income. How do I get him to take this seriously? We are in a crisis. -- Broke

DEAR BROKE: Calculate all of your expenses for your household and your business. Write it all down. Then write down all of your earnings. Put the two next to each other so that you can see where you are financially. Make it clear to him with side-by-side numbers. Tell him you need help figuring out a way forward. This is real and must be addressed now before things get worse.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I are going through a rough patch, and I just don’t know what to do. He seems to believe that I am cheating on him.

This all started one night when I returned home pretty late from going out with a girlfriend who was visiting. It’s rare that I stay out late drinking or partying. My spouse knew exactly where I was going and who I’d be with, but when I got home, he demanded to see my phone. I allowed it because I thought he was being ridiculous. He didn’t find anything suspicious or incriminating, but he’s still been on edge with me since. He’s even been staying overnight at his parents’ place some nights claiming that “it was too late to drive home.”

I’m worried. I’ve tried pleading with him, letting him know there’s nothing going on, but now I fear that he’s just unhappy in our marriage and looking for a reason to leave. We tried a couple’s therapy session, but he refuses to return. I don’t know what to do. -- Rough Patch

DEAR ROUGH PATCH: Ask your husband to sit down and have a serious conversation with you. Ask him what is going on and what he wants. Tell him that you are concerned because it’s obvious that things are tense in your marriage, and you do not know how to fix it. Remind him that he accused you of cheating. Point out that you are not. Is he projecting? Ask him if he is seeing anyone. Tell him you want to get to the root of the problem, but you cannot fix a problem if you cannot name it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend of mine asked me for a referral at my company. About a year and a half ago, she dropped out of college toward the end of her junior year. She’s never been transparent about why, but now she says she’s ready to “pave her own way.” Since she left school, she hasn’t been able to secure a job. She’s reached out to her network, and it seems like a few people have done due diligence to help her and create opportunities for her. She won’t admit it, but I’m hearing from all these helping hands that she showed up late to interviews, didn’t send her resume when requested and even failed a drug test.

Now she has come to me for help, and I told her I’d let her know. The truth is that I’d prefer not to put my name on the line for someone who is apparently irresponsible. How can I be honest with my friend about these missteps that she never even told me about? -- Job Referral

DEAR JOB REFERRAL: Your reputation is everything, and you should not refer her or anyone else unless you can truly vouch for the person. Speak honestly with this woman. Ask her what she wants for her life and how she plans to get there. Inquire as to what her job search has been thus far. Unless you were sworn to secrecy about the other attempts, tell her that you know she has shown up late and failed a drug test. Point out that these things torpedo her chances at getting a job and also damage the reputation of the person making the referral. Tell her you cannot recommend her today, but you are willing to talk to her to help her get her bearings for tomorrow.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)