DEAR HARRIETTE: Is it crossing the line if I attend my ex-boyfriend's wedding? We have known each other for 16 years as neighbors. Despite breaking up three years ago, I recently received an invitation to his upcoming wedding. I am still single since our split, and his impending marriage came as a shock. (Our breakup was fine; we broke up due to career priorities overshadowing our relationship.)
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With his invitation, there is a letter attached saying how he would appreciate it if I attend his wedding. I fear that my attendance may create discomfort for those aware of our history, including his soon-to-be wife. -- Ex's Wedding
DEAR EX’S WEDDING: Why don’t you pick up the phone and give your ex a call? Congratulate him on his upcoming wedding. Let him tell you about his fiancee and their plans for the future. When the time is right, tell him that you do not think it is appropriate for you to attend his wedding -- for many reasons. While you are happy for him that he has found a life partner, you believe that your breakup is still too fresh for it to be comfortable for you to be at that pivotal event.
For your own sanity and peace, you should not go. Clearly, you have not fully moved on. To attend his wedding will be emotionally difficult for you, and likely for others. Do everyone a favor and stay away.