DEAR HARRIETTE: Freshly graduated with my master’s degree and entering the job market, I grapple with uncertainties surrounding negotiating my first salary. As I embark on my career journey, how can I navigate this process successfully, ensuring fair compensation that aligns with my skills and sets the stage for a promising professional future? -- Setting Myself Up for Success

DEAR SETTING MYSELF UP FOR SUCCESS: Do some research. Find out what the average salaries are for the jobs you are interested in having. Then look to see if having an advanced degree will help to up your salary for any of those positions. Continue to educate yourself about the career trajectory for your field of interest. It is smart to look for work where there’s growth potential and respect for your academic accomplishments. If you have practical experience in the field, that helps tremendously, too. Any internships, previous employment or volunteer opportunities that can go on your resume should help make you more appealing to a potential employer.

Know that sometimes you have to start small to grow big. If you do not find a job exactly in your area, that’s OK. Secure a job, and find other ways to get involved in your area of interest. Join professional organizations. Go to business gatherings in your field. Put yourself out there to build a network of people who are doing the work you want to do. Keep at it, and you will be able to find the right fit for you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: In our social circles with married couples, my boyfriend and I face persistent pressure from one friend about getting married. We recently moved in together, which was a big deal for us. We are going at our own pace. But this badgering not only creates discomfort for my boyfriend and me, it also raises questions about our relationship’s future. How can I initiate a calm and honest conversation with my friend, setting clear boundaries and addressing my concerns without causing tension in the group? -- Mind Your Business

DEAR MIND YOUR BUSINESS: Request a get-together with your friend where you can talk openly and privately. Tell them that you appreciate their concern for you, but you need them to back off with the marriage talk. You and your boyfriend are building your relationship at your own pace. It does not help for your friend to pressure you about your future. Ask them to accept the two of you for who you are and where you are in your relationship and to stop asking about your plans.

You may also want to expand your friend group. It is natural for married people to talk about marriage. That is the life circumstance they are in. Your friend probably doesn’t realize how much the topic comes up in conversation because it may be a natural part of their interaction. Still, you can create boundaries. You and your boyfriend can talk about the future and what each of you wants. It’s not a bad idea to map out what comes next.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 23-year-old woman facing a dilemma within my friend group of four. Our group consists of two girls, including myself, and two guys. The other girl in our group enjoys wearing a significant amount of makeup. I don't mind this, as I believe everyone has the right to express themselves in a way that makes them feel confident and beautiful. However, our male friends consistently give her a hard time about her makeup choices. They go as far as telling her to take it off, claiming that she looks ugly with it on. This situation makes me uncomfortable, and I'm unsure about how to address it. I believe everyone has the right to make their own choices regarding their appearance without facing judgment from others. How can I approach my male friends to express my concerns about their comments without causing unnecessary conflict within our friend group? -- Friend Drama

DEAR FRIEND DRAMA: Speak directly to your male friends and ask them to back off. It’s fine for them to have an opinion about your friend, but it’s inappropriate to badger her about it. Insist that they let her be. Tone is everything. Since she loves makeup, they might want to give her some makeup lessons from a pro, but they should stop the name-calling now. That’s not how friends treat each other.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Regarding the woman who felt snubbed for not being invited to be her best friend’s maid of honor: When I got married, I wanted more than anything to have my best friend as my maid of honor. However, I knew it would cause no end of trouble and hard feelings if I didn't have my sister in that position. Therefore, I explained the situation to my best friend, and she understood and accepted it. Funnily enough, about 10 years earlier when she got married, she had asked much the same of me. It wasn't her sister, but her high school friend whom she felt she needed to ask to take the position. I acquiesced because it made no difference to me; it didn't mean we weren't best friends, and I felt no ill will toward anyone. Besides, it was her big day to do as she wished, and I would never in a million years want to do anything to cause it to be less than what she'd dreamed of. In my opinion, it seems that too often people forget that true love, in all its forms, should be patient, kind and understanding. -- True Love

DEAR TRUE LOVE: Thank you for your perspective. Weddings stir up many emotions, particularly around hierarchy in relationships. Remembering to look through the eyes of love and compassion can help tremendously for all parties involved.

Communication is key. I would like to recommend to all brides to talk to your friends and loved ones. You can choose whomever you want to stand with you in your wedding, but it is wise and kind to talk to the ones who don’t get to have that role of honor to ensure that they know you love and value them. Perhaps there are other roles they can take on to support you and keep the circle of positivity flowing.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a mother of two daughters, and I've developed a close friendship with another mom in my neighborhood who also has two daughters the same ages as mine. We've been meeting for coffee every Tuesday for the past year. However, over the past month, my friend has unexpectedly canceled our coffee dates with what seem like unusual excuses. While I understand that life can get busy, the consistency of these cancellations has left me feeling confused and a bit hurt. Our friendship has become an important part of my life, and the sudden change has me questioning whether I might have unintentionally done something to upset her. Our kids have also formed a bond, making the situation even more confusing. Part of me wants to reach out and ask if everything is OK or if there's something I may have said or done to cause any discomfort. On the other hand, I don't want to come across as confrontational or add unnecessary strain to what has been a positive connection. How should I approach this situation? -- Estranged

DEAR ESTRANGED: Stop taking this personally until you have gathered more information. Call your friend and ask her if she is OK. It could be that something is happening in her world that has disrupted her schedule. Tell her you are concerned about her since she has recently canceled your coffee dates. Tell her that you miss her, and your children miss her children. Listen to see what she says.

If she hedges and doesn’t seem to be forthcoming, then you can ask if you did or said something to make her uncomfortable. Do your best to get her to reveal whatever is going on. Just know that it could easily be that her life got complicated and something completely separate from you has impacted her routine.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I share a deep love for animals, particularly dogs. While our shared passion for furry companionship has always been a bonding point, lately it is almost our breaking point. My wife has a habit of bringing home more dogs, and while I appreciate her love for animals, the financial strain is becoming evident. We're reaching a point where the expenses related to the care of our dogs are putting a strain on our budget. I've tried expressing my concerns about the affordability of maintaining additional pets, but my wife seems to prioritize the emotional fulfillment they bring over the practical aspects. I'm finding myself frustrated and worried about the long-term impact on our financial stability. How can I communicate my concerns effectively without causing unnecessary conflict? I want to find a balance between respecting her passion for animals and ensuring that we make responsible decisions for our family's overall well-being. -- Too Many Dogs

DEAR TOO MANY DOGS: Create a budget where you list all of your expenses. Put dog food and maintenance in a separate category so that you can clearly show those costs. Compare the expenses to your income, and point out the discrepancies. Review your budget with your wife so that she can see how your dollars are being used. Tell her you two need to draw the line and find homes for some of the dogs because you cannot afford to care for them all.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)