DEAR HARRIETTE: I find myself in a challenging situation with a close friend. We have known each other for 10 years. Recently, we had a heated argument, and it all stems from her consistently condescending behavior. I've noticed that my friend tends to speak down to me and others, undermining our opinions and making us feel inferior. I've tried addressing this issue with her, but my attempts have been met with defensiveness and dismissiveness. The tension has escalated to the point where our friendship is at risk. I value this relationship, but I can't continue to tolerate the condescension. How can I communicate effectively with my friend about her behavior without causing further damage to our friendship? Is there a way to make her understand the impact of her condescension and work toward a healthier dynamic? I want to salvage our friendship, but it seems like we're stuck in a cycle of negativity. -- At an Impasse

DEAR AT AN IMPASSE: Because you value this friendship so much, think about the person. What is going on in your friend’s life? Is there a reason you can think of for why she is so negative and condescending? Chances are, someone speaks to her in the same way. Approach your friend through the lens of compassion. Rather than challenging her, express your concern that something is going on in her life that is giving her emotional pain. Tenderly ask with a genuine interest in learning what is at the heart of her negativity. It may be that she needs therapy to help heal emotional wounds. You can encourage that.

You do not have to accept emotional abuse, however. If you are unable to convince your friend to speak to you and others more kindly, you may have to draw the line on how much you interact with her -- at least for now. As hard as it may be to say, tell her that you are unwilling to be berated anymore. If she can’t stop, you can no longer spend time with her.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been in a relationship for a little over a year, and my girlfriend frequently prepares dinner for us at home. While I appreciate her effort, I'm not particularly fond of some of her dishes, especially when I'm confident in my own cooking abilities. She insists on taking charge in the kitchen. How can I subtly offer cooking tips or express my preferences without hurting her feelings or undermining her efforts? -- Cooking Lessons

DEAR COOKING LESSONS: It is unlikely that your jumping in to coach in the kitchen will be a welcome offering. Instead, consider two options. Thank her for being so eager to cook, and tell her you like to cook, too. Put your foot down and say you want to cook two or three days a week, and make a plan together for when that will be.

Also, invite her to do something culinary together, like taking a cooking class. This can be a fun, ongoing date and a chance for her to refine her cooking skills and you to have fun with her in the kitchen. It could lead to the two of you cooking together at home!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My great-aunt and great-uncle recently shared their intention to leave me their cherished small jewelry store when they pass away. This business holds sentimental value, as it was established and nurtured by them, becoming a local staple. While my cousins or siblings would gladly inherit this legacy, I’m uncertain about taking on the role of a business owner, particularly as I approach middle age. The stress and responsibility associated with running the store are daunting to me. How can I address this situation delicately without disappointing my relatives or feeling overwhelmed by this unexpected inheritance? -- Inheritance Woes

DEAR INHERITANCE WOES: Be grateful that your aunt and uncle gave you the heads-up about their plans. Instead of freaking out, spend time with them learning about the ins and outs of the business. Thank them for their confidence in you to continue their dream, and be forthright about your apprehensions. Start by asking them as many clarifying questions as you can. Why have they chosen you for this daunting role? What do they see in you that makes them trust that you are the right person for the job? How does the business function? Is it profitable? What are the weak points? How do they source inventory? Who works for them and can be trusted? Learn absolutely everything that you can so that you are ready when they pass -- or so that you can respectfully and clearly tell them you cannot accept their generous gift.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently went on a first date with a nice guy I met online, but during our time together, I noticed his attention often wandered to other women around us. While we haven't established exclusivity, given this was date No. 1, I'm unsure if my feelings of discomfort stem from being overly sensitive or if it's a sign of potential compatibility issues. He's asked me for a second date, and I'm conflicted about whether to accept. Should I give it another chance and go on a second date, or is it a cue to reassess our connection and expectations moving forward? -- Wandering Eyes

DEAR WANDERING EYES: If you find the guy interesting, you have a couple of options. You can talk to him before accepting his invitation and tell him that while you enjoyed his company, you are a bit surprised that he called you for another date because you noticed that he was distracted by other women the whole time you were together. If he can’t focus on you during your date, you will pass on going out again. That may seem abrupt, but it addresses your concern directly and gives him an opportunity to see his behavior and react to it.

If you don’t think you can be that bold, you can go out with him one more time. At the first indication of wandering eyes, you need to check him on it. You can use humor by saying something like, “Are you on this date with me, or are you interested in inviting someone else to join our party?” If he acts surprised, point out that he is doing something you noticed on your first date, namely being distracted by other women when he is supposed to be paying attention to you. Make it clear to him that no matter what his excuse is, if he wants to date you, he needs to put on some blinders.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions toaskharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: As the eldest in my family, I’ve unintentionally become the default babysitter for my grandchildren, great-nieces, nephews and other younger family members during gatherings. This shift has made family reunions less enjoyable, as I anticipate being on constant babysitting duty.

Considering this, I’m contemplating skipping the upcoming family reunion. How can I navigate this situation and maintain family connections without feeling burdened by constant child care responsibilities? -- No More Child Care

DEAR NO MORE CHILD CARE: As the elder in your family, your family should respect your wishes, including how you spend your time. You should stop allowing your family members to assume that you want to babysit. Rather than ditching the family reunion, ditch that role.

Before the event, let everyone know that you will not be on duty for child care. Explain that you will no longer be able to fill that role, so they need to arrange for someone else to bear that responsibility. Of course you are happy to greet the children and give them some loving attention, but you will not accept the extremely important caretaking role that has been assumed to be yours up to this point.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm reaching out because I'm facing a significant challenge in my romantic relationship. My partner and I have been together for a couple of years, and we've always had different perspectives on travel. I'm passionate about exploring new places and crave the excitement of frequent adventures, while my partner is more of a homebody, preferring the comfort and routine of our domestic life.

Lately, this difference in our preferences has become a source of tension. I feel a strong desire to travel, experience new cultures and make memories together, but my partner is resistant to the idea. It's causing stress in our relationship, and I'm worried about the long-term impact. How can we find a compromise that allows me to satisfy my traveling desires while also respecting my partner's need for stability? -- Traveler Vs. Homebody

DEAR TRAVELER VS. HOMEBODY: The challenge you have described has been there since the beginning. Somehow, you were able to accept it when you got into a relationship with this person. How were you able to find peace with their travel choices then? Think back. What made you look beyond this significant difference?

It could be that you liked your partner enough to forgive them for being different. Can you do that now? It doesn’t mean you have to throw your travel dreams away. It may mean you have to modify them.

Do you have any friends who do like to travel? I know many married people who have homebody spouses. They fulfill their travel bug by taking off with friends to go on adventures. There’s safety in numbers, and the group is actually friends, so there’s comfort in knowing that you are in good company. Other folks decide to take an annual trip on their own. They map it out and create an itinerary that they then give to their partner or someone else who is happy to keep an eye out on them from a distance.

You don’t have to give up your passions to be a good partner. You just have to be an honest and excellent communicator.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)