DEAR HARRIETTE: I am going into my senior year of college next year, and I’m getting scared to become an adult, especially in such an economically trying time. A lot of my friends come from wealth and will have their parents to fall back on when they graduate. They may get an allowance or have their rent paid by their parents, so they don’t have to worry about struggling. I, on the other hand, do not have that luxury and have to work extremely hard to find a job and support myself financially, which is a scary thought.

I realize the importance of being financially independent, but I'm feeling overwhelmed by the prospect of facing this responsibility alone. Given the economic challenges, how can I prepare myself for the transition to financial independence after graduation and ensure I can support myself and succeed in this uncertain landscape? -- Afraid of the Future

DEAR AFRAID OF THE FUTURE: Start looking for a job now. If you haven’t had internships or other jobs during your college years, see if you can find something while you are still in school. Job experience counts a lot as you plan to start your professional life. Talk to the career counseling center at your school and ask them for job referrals. Most colleges have designated people ready to help set you up for success. Be extremely proactive. Go to networking events in your area of interest. Speak to people, and talk about yourself and your dreams. Instead of walking in fear, walk in the confidence that you are ready to step into your adult life and make your way. Sure, it’s a bit scary, but it is also exciting. This is your time!

DEAR HARRIETTE: As fall sets in and winter approaches, I struggle with seasonal depression. I often end up staying in my apartment every second that I don’t have a responsibility. I don’t reach out to friends much. I become a recluse. What are some strategies to combat these feelings and stay emotionally healthy during the colder months? -- In Hibernation

DEAR IN HIBERNATION: You are not alone. There is a condition known as seasonal affective disorder that manifests in a number of symptoms that mirror depression. According to the National Institutes of Health, you may have this if you are experiencing the following: feeling depressed most of the day, nearly every day; losing interest in activities you once enjoyed; experiencing changes in appetite or weight; having problems with sleep; feeling sluggish or agitated; having low energy; feeling hopeless or worthless; having difficulty concentrating; or having frequent thoughts of death or suicide.

This condition must be diagnosed by a professional. The good news is that there are treatments that can help, including light therapy, psychotherapy, antidepressant medications and, believe it or not, vitamin D.

Whether you are diagnosed with SAD or something else, if you are feeling unwell, don’t suffer alone. Get help from a professional. If you ever are feeling suicidal, call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline toll-free at 988. You can reach the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in a new relationship, and my boyfriend's mom doesn't like me. I asked my boyfriend if there was something I did for her to not like me, and he told me that she wanted him to get back with his ex. Hearing this really hurt my feelings because, from the moment she met me, she has never given me a chance. I truly love my boyfriend, but knowing the fact that his mom doesn't like me makes it hard for me to see a future with him. What should I do? -- Disapproving Partner’s MomSon

DEAR DISAPPROVING PARTNER’S MOM: Don’t give up just yet. Do some sleuthing instead. Why did your boyfriend and his ex break up? How long were they together? What is their story? It makes sense that his mom would have some allegiance to his old flame if they were together for a while and the mom had a relationship with her. Find out the backstory. Then, if it seems like you want to be with this man, have patience. The two of you need to build your relationship, and you need to have patience as his mom gets to know you. She is likely pretty guarded, considering she already opened her heart to someone and now that person is gone. If this relationship is meant to be, you will have to work at gaining her trust as the two of you get to know each other and figure out your future.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My wife and I have been married for four years and have a 2-year-old son. At the beginning of our marriage, we spent a lot of quality time together; however, my wife is now fulfilling her clinical hours for medical school, and we hardly spend any time together. I got a work-from-home position in IT, but I only see her before she is headed to work and before bed. I know she is focused on finishing school, and I am happy for her, but I see that our marriage is starting to become affected by it. Should I bother speaking to her about my concerns? -- Busy Wife

DEAR BUSY WIFE: The early years in a marriage with a child can be taxing. Add med school duties, and you double the stress and strain. The good news is that this phase will pass. It may not feel like it now, but all of the work that it takes for your wife to become a doctor will eventually be worth it.

That said, yes, you should talk to her about the situation. Show compassion for her grueling schedule, but also let her know that you feel lonely and disconnected and possibly overwhelmed with the toddler all by yourself. Suggest having date night once a week. It could be something simple -- eating a meal together at home, which is not always easy to accomplish. Also require regular playtime with your child.� You cannot do all the parenting yourself. Even if your wife cannot do all that you ask of her, let her know you need her. You need to communicate with her regularly, if only for a few minutes a day. And let her know you have her back as she goes through this extremely taxing time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Since August, I have committed myself to peace and happiness. Unfortunately, since doing this, every trial and trouble has been presented at my doorstep. What are the best ways to handle tribulations while trying to remain in a positive and serene place mentally and emotionally? Any advice will be helpful. -- Searching for Happiness

DEAR SEARCHING FOR HAPPINESS: I believe there is a Bible verse that says that the closer you get to being in union with God, the more obstacles will come before you. To live in a constant state of peace takes a tremendous amount of discipline, focus and work. You have to be vigilant. So much of it is about attitude. When bad things happen, how do you react to them? Practice observing what’s come into your life without responding right away. Stand back. Notice the person, situation or impediment that has shown up. Consider what it is, why it may be there and what lesson you can learn from it, then take action. Often, the best response is no response. You can see whatever is before you for what it is, recognize that it is out of your control or not necessary to address and move on. Sometimes you will have to deal with it. Then look for a way to handle the moment and leave honor on all sides of it. Backing yourself or someone else into a corner can be dangerous and unnecessary, especially if your goal is peace. Take each situation one step at a time.

Do know that in the moment, taking this advice may seem impossible. There will be times when you don’t feel calm or peaceful. Your goal should be to attain that peaceful state as quickly as possible. You get there by believing in yourself, standing in your power and looking out at others with compassion and patience.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have worked for a small nonprofit organization for the past five years. This year, two people have been let go due to budget cuts. My boss called me into the office last Friday to explain that she needs to reduce my salary but has given me more work. I enjoy working here, but having my salary reduced is putting me in a tight spot financially. Should I speak with my boss about this even though I know she can’t pay me more? -- Salary Reduced

DEAR SALARY REDUCED: Don’t ask for something you cannot receive. That will only create more friction. Instead, think of what else you may be able to have. Can you get a promotion in title for now and an increased salary later? Position yourself as invaluable, and ask to be acknowledged for that. Ask for more paid time off. Be strategic because you know your boss needs you, but you also must take care of yourself. Ask for a week or two extra of time off in exchange for the reduced salary and increased responsibilities. You may also want to start looking for a new job.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)