DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 24-year-old man, and I bought a trailer home about a year ago. I like that I am a homeowner, but the anxiety that comes with being one is consuming me every day. I work in construction, and I go home every day on my lunch break to ensure that nothing is wrong with it. I wake up with my heart racing, scared that something will go wrong with the electricity or plumbing -- or that I might even get robbed.

I want the liberty of being a homeowner and having property to call my own, but I don’t know how much longer I will be able to live like this. People have been suggesting selling the home and renting an apartment because there will always be maintenance costs and repairs, but in a rental those would not fall on me. I, however, like my privacy and peace, which is why I like living further out in the country in my mobile home. What do you suggest I do? -- Stay or Sell

DEAR STAY OR SELL: Calm down. Yes, it is a big deal to buy a home, but don’t give up. You can figure it out. Start with where you are parking it. Is the trailer park safe? How are other homeowners managing there? Figure out if your concerns are valid, or if you are overly worried. If the neighborhood is questionable, move. That’s the great thing about a mobile home -- you can drive to another location. Insure your home fully so that if something does happen, you are covered. Install a security system that will track any movement surrounding or within your home. Then do your best to enjoy your life. It may take some time to get used to the responsibility of owning your first home, but you can do it.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a cabin where I spend a lot of time in the summer. My friends from college called and asked if they could come spend a week with me. I agreed, with the contingency that they be self-sufficient, meaning they bring their own food and cook it, stay tidy, etc. I intend to work on my art, and I don’t have time or money to play hostess. Do you think this will work? -- On Your Own

DEAR ON YOUR OWN: Think about your friends. Are they independent and responsible? Are they neat? They need to be prepared to fend for themselves and respect your space. If you believe that this group has that capability and you have been crystal clear with them about your expectations, you can extend the invitation. Be sure to tell them when you can spend time with them, whether you intend to share any meals with them and any other specifics about being in your home that you feel they should know. Since they did tell you they want to spend time with you, you must figure out how to manage that. Carve out time each day that you can devote to them so that they don’t feel like they are in a hotel. You will have to host a little bit. If you can’t, this is not the right time for them to come.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been going out to dinner with friends too often this summer. We have been hanging hard, and it has been fun but expensive. Because some of us drink alcohol and others don't, I actually don’t think it’s fair for us to split the bill evenly all the time. One of my friends drinks water only. Because she is nice and doesn’t want to make waves, she never says anything. The last time she and I went to dinner just the two of us, I paid for what I consumed and did not make her split it. My bill cost almost $40 more than hers. She thanked me, but I know she isn’t going to say anything to the rest of the group. Should I? -- Fair Pay

DEAR FAIR PAY: Your friend may not want you calling attention to her specifically, but you can draw the group’s attention to what you have been spending and the fact that everybody is consuming differently. You can tell them that the two of you went out the other night and you realized how much more you had consumed than your friend, so you looked closely at the bill and noticed the difference; therefore, you paid what you owed. Recommend that you take time when you are going out with the group in the future to see what people have consumed and consider paying more equitably. If they balk, ask them how they would feel if they consumed $30 worth of food and beverage but had to pay $60 or more for it because they were with friends. That may ring more clearly to them.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend I am just getting to know better. We like each other a lot and have similar backgrounds and stories. I recently learned that she has had her share of romantic liaisons over the years, even though she has been married all along.

Part of me envies her. Rather than complaining all the time about what her husband does or doesn’t do, she has filled her cup. When I look at my life, I think I have mainly complained. Do you think I should have an affair now? I’ve been married forever. Our life is snoring boring. Maybe I can spice it up with a bit of romance. -- Considering an Affair

DEAR CONSIDERING AN AFFAIR: You and your friend may have similar lives, but you are not the same. Her choices and yours are not the same. Don’t try to "fix" your life by attempting to step into her shoes. Your friend made certain choices, and her life has played out in a particular way. You have made your own choices, and those decisions have gotten you to where you are now. If you feel like there is something wrong with your marriage, deal with it, but be yourself. Stand up for what you believe and discuss that with your husband. Don’t try to be someone you are not. It will not work.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: How do I go about telling my roommate that I no longer want to room with her because she snores too loudly? Our apartment lease is almost up, and we need to decide if we want to live together again and renew it. She told me she definitely wants to room together again because I was such a great roommate. She was, too. She does a really good job at cleaning up after herself and respecting my boundaries.

The big issue at hand is that she snores loudly at night, and we share a bedroom. I have lost hours of sleep because her snoring is unbearable, and I have been exhausted many times because of her. I wouldn’t consider myself a light sleeper in the slightest, either; her snoring is just that loud. How do I broach this topic lightly, as I don’t want to hurt her feelings? -- Can’t Sleep

DEAR CAN’T SLEEP: Is there any way that you can get a bigger apartment with two bedrooms? That could solve your problem. You two enjoy living together, aside from the snoring. Being in separate rooms could resolve that and help you to stay together. Talk to your roommate. Tell her the truth and recommend the solution of finding a new place to live. If neither of you wants to do that, agree to part ways. Then you will have to decide if you stay at your current location and find a new roommate or start the whole process over again.

Can you avoid hurting your roommate’s feelings? You can be kind and compassionate when you tell her. But in the end, you have to take care of yourself too. Your solution of two bedrooms shows you aren’t rejecting her. You just need some space.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I need some guidance when it comes to managing my finances. I am fortunate enough to have found a living situation where my rent is quite low, but despite this, I still find myself struggling to make ends meet. Living paycheck to paycheck has become the norm for me, and I can't seem to break free from this cycle. Do you have any tips or advice on how I can become better with money? Any help you can provide would be greatly appreciated. -- Struggling

DEAR STRUGGLING: Many people take on part-time jobs to help save money. You may want to consider taking on a project or finding a job on the weekends or in the evenings where you can earn some extra cash. If you save all of that money over a period of time, you will be able to create a nest egg for yourself. Yes, it takes energy and time, but it is worth it.

You can also survey your possessions and see if you can sell anything. Cook for yourself more than you eat out. Don’t buy anything that you don’t absolutely need. All of these little things add up to money in the bank.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)