DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve usually only kept one or two close friends around me and considered the rest of the people I interacted with acquaintances. I tried having a larger friend group, and that didn’t fare well for me for many reasons, so I went back to just having one or two close friends. I find myself sometimes wishing that larger friend groups were for me because when my one friend is busy, I have to plan to do things by myself or not at all. I also feel as if I’m missing out on those “movie moments,” where you see a friend group doing something crazy together. I don’t know if I should give a friend group another chance or if I should just continue the way I am going with my life. -- Alone

DEAR ALONE: Some people are great at group interactions and engagements. Others, not so much. It is OK that you fall into the second group. It is important that you understand how you interact with people and what makes you comfortable. If you naturally find yourself making friends with a group of people, by all means explore that and see if it can work for you. In group dynamics, often individual members are closer to some friends than others, but if you sit back and observe and notice how people engage each other, you can find a rhythm that works for you.

If you don’t find that group, that’s OK too. It is even OK to make that movie moment a solo experience. Take yourself to the movies and enjoy what you see. Invite someone from work or your neighborhood to join you from time to time. You can be brave and bold in that way by inviting new people in, but don’t be afraid of going solo.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a very clumsy friend. Every time she comes over to my house, it seems that she inevitably breaks something of mine. It has almost become a running joke, but I'm getting really frustrated. The last time she came over, she accidentally knocked over a vase and shattered it. Before that, she spilled red wine on my new white carpet, leaving a permanent stain. And before that, she somehow managed to break the arm off my favorite chair.

I know accidents happen, but it feels like this happens every time she visits. I've tried to confront her about it, and she laughs it off and insists that she's "just clumsy," but I can't keep replacing my things every time she comes over. What should I do? Should I stop inviting her over? Is there a way to address this without hurting her feelings? I don't want to lose my friend, but I can't keep letting her break my things. -- Clumsy Friend

DEAR CLUMSY FRIEND: Start planning dates with her outside of your home. Meet at a park, an art exhibition, a restaurant, a bar. Decide you will spend time with her discovering new sites and activities in your town. Be mindful not to choose things that are expensive. Look for free or low-cost activities that will inspire you two without destroying your home. If she asks why you aren’t inviting her to visit, tell her the truth: You want to preserve the friendship AND your furniture!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a condition where I tend to pass out frequently, and standing for long periods of time is a known trigger for me. I just received an exciting job opportunity that would require me to be on my feet all day.

As you can imagine, this has me feeling incredibly nervous, and I am unsure whether I should take the job. On one hand, I am thrilled at the prospect of this new opportunity and the challenges it will bring. On the other hand, I am worried about how my condition will affect my ability to perform my duties effectively.

How can I prepare myself to manage my condition while working in an environment where I will be on my feet for extended periods of time? Perhaps more important, should I take the job or pass on it in favor of something that would be less physically demanding? -- New Job

DEAR NEW JOB: A thorough job application should ask you if you have the capability to handle the tasks of that job. Often, these applications will mention how many hours you are expected to stand or the weight you are expected to lift (up to a particular amount) as well as other such things. Did this job ask that? It sounds like you already know that this job may extend beyond your physical capacity.

Rather than go in there and risk your health, talk to your future supervisor. Reveal your condition and ask if any accommodation can be made for you. For instance, can you have a chair nearby if you need to sit down? Work it out in advance, or you will be setting yourself up for failure.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My freshman year of college, I made a friend group of seven girls because it was what I thought I wanted. Not far into the friendship, there were big issues I was facing in the group. The majority of the girls would be late when we tried to plan outings together, but they wouldn’t have a good excuse, which made me feel as if they didn’t respect me or my time at all. I also noticed that most of the girls had really bad spending habits, where they would overspend on food and clothes and then expect me or other friends to bail them out when they ran out of money. I talked to them about both the time and the money issues, and it wasn’t well-received. They were upset and said that it was none of my business, and they never ended up changing their timing issues.

Being on time and able to manage money properly are two huge values I hold close to me. I left the friend group partly due to these issues. Do you think I handled the situation well, or should I not have said anything? -- Cut Ties

DEAR CUT TIES: When you select and cultivate friendships, you should look for people who share your values. That does not mean that they have to like and do everything that appeals to you. It means that the core beliefs that guide your life should be in sync with them. Otherwise, you run into situations like what you experienced.

You handled it correctly. After addressing your friends about their bad habits repeatedly to no avail, you had two choices: Stay and accept it, or leave. You made the right choice for you.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a friend over for dinner who brought along a friend of their own. While I was in the kitchen preparing food, the friend of a friend had free range of the house. After they left, I realized that a valuable item was missing, and I can't shake the feeling that it was this friend of a friend who took it. The problem is I have no concrete proof. I don't want to falsely accuse someone or cause unnecessary drama in my friend group, but I can't stop thinking about it. I've been trying to put it out of my mind, but every time I think about it, I feel violated and uneasy. What should I do? Should I confront the friend of a friend? Should I let it go and chalk it up to bad luck? -- Gut Feeling

DEAR GUT FEELING: I think you should speak to the friend who brought this person into your home. Explain what happened and that you cannot prove anything, but you suspect that their friend stole from you. Point out that someone at the gathering took the item. You know that because it was there before guests arrived and not the next morning. Ask your friend if they can vouch for this person’s honesty. Inquire as to what they recommend you do. For example, ask their opinion about whether you should mention it to the person, or should they? Or do you leave it alone because you have no proof?

Clearly, this is a violation of trust. When you invite people into your home, you never imagine that a guest would steal from you. Acknowledge that this is an awkward conversation, but you feel violated and thought they should know.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend from college is in town for a month and asked if he could stay with me. I agreed, and let me tell you, I regret it. He is a mess. I don’t know what he is accustomed to, but he acts like I am his maid. He makes a mess in the bathroom and doesn’t clean up after himself. He cooks food sometimes, but he never washes the dishes. When I cook, he enjoys being served but doesn’t even offer to clear the table let alone do the dishes -- which isn’t that much. It’s mostly putting the dishes in the dishwasher. His room is a mess. You get the picture.

I don’t live like this. I want to be a good host, but he is stretching my limits. Would it be rude of me to call this behavior to his attention? -- Messy Houseguest

DEAR MESSY HOUSEGUEST: You have every right to speak to him about how he is living in your home. Ask him to sit down to talk to you. Tell him that you were happy to accommodate him when he asked if he could stay with you for a while, but you have come to regret your decision. That will get his attention. Tell him how surprised you have been that he does not keep your place tidy or even offer to help out with household tasks. Tell him that if he is to stay any longer in your home, you have things that you will need him to do to pitch in. Make a list so that there is no need for interpretation. Ask him to agree to the list, including the frequency of chores. If he does not comply at once, invite him to leave.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)