DEAR HARRIETTE: I am watching my friend become a snob right before my eyes. She is earning significantly more money than she did last year, and it has turned her into a completely different person. We had favorite bars, restaurants and retail stores that we used to frequent, and now she acts like all of those places are beneath her. I am worried that I’ve lost my friend. What should I do? -- Who Are You?

DEAR WHO ARE YOU?: Invite your friend to get together in a quiet place, perhaps in your home. Tell her you want to talk to her. Let her know how proud you are of her accomplishments this year. Add that you are beginning to be concerned because she seems to have walked away entirely from the social life that you two once enjoyed together. While it is fun to explore new places, you have noticed that she now wants to go to fancy locales only, and worse, she speaks negatively about the spots you recently called home. Tell her you miss spending time with her in some of your old haunts. Suggest that you add some of those spots back into your weekend rotation.

Listen to what she has to say. Sure, it’s fun to try out new spots, but if she is set against any allegiance to her former life, you have reason to be worried. You are a part of her past. You will have to decide if you want to fight for your friendship or accept that your friend has turned the page -- and you may not be in her next chapter.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a freelancer. Every year around this time, I worry about what jobs I will get next year. Usually, things are slow at the beginning of the year. I am beginning to worry. I have a couple of clients who are skittish about the economy and who may choose not to engage my services. I have reached out to them to see what their plans are, but nothing is set yet. I have a little bit of money saved, but not enough for more than a few months. What can I do to calm down and set myself up for success in the midst of uncertainty? -- Need Security

DEAR NEED SECURITY: As you wait to hear from your current clients, seek out new ones. Make a list of businesses and individuals who may be interested in your services, and send them pitch letters or pick up the phone and call to see if you can fulfill their needs. Be aggressive. Research and then call at least five companies each day. Create a script that you can follow so that you can keep your message and energy up, even if you are feeling low or tired. Be prepared to share examples of your work. If you have any testimonials, be sure to include them in your pitching. You can also create a holiday message that you send to current and prospective clients that will remind them that you are in the game and are thinking of them.

Finally, consider what unrelated part-time work you can take on in case you need a financial pick-me-up at the beginning of the year.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who is very judgmental. Whenever I see her, the first thing she does is size me up, pointing out things that I should fix so to appear more pulled together. Because she works in the fashion industry, I have let her remarks slide, but I am getting tired of it.

Think about it: If I am already out ready for a nice evening and my friend greets me with criticism, it’s hard for me to feel as good about myself as I did right before seeing her. I’m not trying to be in competition with anyone, but I also don’t want to feel like I’m constantly doing something wrong. How can I get my friend to stop? -- Keep Your Comments to Yourself

DEAR KEEP YOUR COMMENTS TO YOURSELF: Check your friend the next time you see her. Before she jumps in with comments, greet her and tell her how happy you are to see her. The moment she begins with a criticism, interrupt her midsentence and tell her you aren’t interested in her fashion commentary today. You can say it lightly or sharply -- whatever the moment calls for -- as long as you stop her. You can change the subject and comment on something you like about her look, ask her a question or turn to another person in the group and speak to them. If she won’t back down and attempts to make another comment about how you look, make eye contact and ask her to please stop; you feel great about how you look, and you are not interested in listening to whatever insult she is about to send your way.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I post a lot on social media. I recently spoke to a friend I haven’t seen in a while, and he asked if I had lost weight based on my recent postings. I told him that I’m working on it, which is true, but now I am nervous to see him. I may have lost 5 pounds or so, but I look much bigger in person -- you know how those little boxes look on social media or Zoom. How can I feel confident about seeing him when I know I am still overweight? -- The Real Me

DEAR THE REAL ME: Most of us haven’t seen people at all or much since the pandemic sent us home. Seeing people through photographs or in "Hollywood Squares"-style boxes doesn’t present a full picture of how we look. That is true for your friend as well. Hopefully his question about your weight was meant as a positive. Hopefully he was encouraging you and noting that you look good. He probably could have used better words for it.

Just be yourself. Accept the body you are in, and dress yourself as best as you can. That’s true for meeting up with him or anybody else. Put your best foot forward. It can feel awkward putting yourself out there after so much time hidden away at home, but being with people is worth whatever anxiety you might initially feel. Get out and have a good time, and work on your health so that you can be as vibrant as possible.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a number of health challenges that I have been dealing with for a few years. Nobody in my life really knows about them. I take my medication. I stay in touch with my doctors, but in the past year I haven’t been exercising or doing the physical maintenance work that I promised to do. I’m doing OK, but I know I could be doing better. I’m about to have a physical, and I’m worried that my doctor is going to be disappointed in me. I feel like I should cancel my appointment. I can’t take the stress of letting anybody else down. I am the one who is called upon in my family to hold everything together. It is hard for me, and I’m not doing so well right now. I’m thinking if I start my exercise program now and then postpone my appointment for six months, I will have better results when I go in. Does that sound crazy? -- Too Much Pressure

DEAR TOO MUCH PRESSURE: Please do not cancel your doctor’s appointment. Consider your doctor an ally. Be honest at your appointment. Explain that you haven’t done all that you were asked to do or promised to do. State where you are physically and emotionally. Be as forthcoming as possible. This will help your doctor to be able to evaluate the status of your health and make informed recommendations. If you don’t tell the truth, you may end up with advice or even medication that doesn’t suit your needs right now.

Also, be honest about what you think you are willing to do moving forward. For example, don’t pledge to run 5 miles a day if you don’t walk 1 mile a week now. Be realistic. And ask for help in all areas where you have needs. You can get referrals for a dietician, physical therapist, mental health professional and more.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend feels stuck at her current job. She has an impressive resume, and I know she’s overqualified for the job she has now. Anyone would hire someone like her. She doesn’t want to be without income, but I can see how miserable this current job is making her. I don’t know how to get her to take a leap of faith. How do I encourage her to start the journey of at least searching for a job? -- Leap of Faith

DEAR LEAP OF FAITH: While your girlfriend may be overqualified for her job, it sounds like she needs some confidence-boosting in order to push forward to what’s next. Start by encouraging her to update her resume. Ask her to talk through it with you so that she says out loud what her qualifications are, what she has learned and where she could be headed. Suggest that she go on LinkedIn and look for jobs in her area of interest. She can go on virtual job interviews just to get a sense of what’s out there. She can consider it a fun activity to talk to potential employers about what they do and how she might fit in. If she starts the conversations purely as an exploration, the performance pressure will be off. Encourage her to take this step. It can help build her confidence for making a move.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)