DEAR HARRIETTE: I work freelance on a project that uses several teams to complete work. I was asked to provide creative guidance to one of the teams, and it is proving to be difficult. These people do not believe that they need to answer to me. My guess is that the manager of the whole project neglected to tell them that they should listen to me. As a result, whenever I provide feedback, they rarely incorporate it. Then I have to double back and pressure them to make even the smallest correction. It is exhausting. How can I get them to at least consider my comments? -- Unheard

DEAR UNHEARD: Request a meeting with the project manager. Express your concern that your input is not being considered. Remind the manager that they had asked you to bring your expertise to this project. Ask the manager to reinforce their decision to have you be involved so that the rest of the team is clear about roles and responsibilities. Also, identify a point person who can be your partner on the project. Request that the two of you work together to ensure that all feedback has been received and is being reviewed. Establishing a personal connection should help you to build a better bond.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Several people have been laid off at my job. I work for a small startup, and those of us who are left are all worried that one of us is next. There’s a lot of whispering and worrying going on, and tons of finger-pointing. The boss hasn’t really said much about the layoffs other than that they needed to tighten their belts. That has gotten everybody worrying about what that means for the future. People are now walking around on edge or becoming super competitive. The collaborative way that we used to work is quickly being replaced by aggressive, fearful bullying. I am not in charge, but I would like to help turn things around. What can I do? -- Get Reinspired

DEAR GET REINSPIRED: If you have a rapport with the company’s leader, ask to have a chat with them. Point out that you have noticed a dip in morale. Ask if you can help leadership turn that around by finding ways to establish more collaborative moments. Without singling anyone out, explain that people are worried about the future, and it is turning into bullying and negative behavior. Ask about incentives that the company may be able to offer, or even if leadership can host a cheerleading session to reset the vision for the company and expectations for their work and the future.

With your friends and colleagues at work, remain positive. Encourage others to stay the course, do the work at hand and believe that better days are ahead. Do not succumb to the negative chatter, but do pay attention. Leadership must step up in order for this fledgling company to survive. If you don’t see them making any effort, that is your sign to look for another job.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have some important things to discuss with my husband about our future, but I find that I am either too busy or too nervous to bring them up. We have been unhappy for a long time. I have done my best to deal with his grumpiness and overall malaise, but I am tired of it. Nothing that I do seems to make a difference. He just stays negative.

I am the principal breadwinner in our household, which is fine with me. What I don’t like is that my husband tries to diminish my contributions and act like he is the reason anything good has happened in our life. Instead of saying thank you from time to time, he brags to others about how much he has done for our family. Meanwhile, he sits on his butt doing nothing most of the time.

You know that saying, “I can do bad all by myself”? Well, that’s how I’m feeling right about now. I know marriage is supposed to be till death do us part, but I’m feeling like parting right now. I have asked my husband to go to counseling, but he refuses, saying there’s nothing wrong with him. I either need us to do a reset, or it’s time for me to go. What do you recommend? -- Is It Time?

DEAR IS IT TIME?: Only you can decide when you are ready to leave your marriage, but you can get some assistance in sorting through your life. Just because your husband won’t go to counseling doesn’t mean that you can’t. Find a therapist -- preferably through your health insurance plan -- that you can visit weekly. Talk through your issues and be as open and honest as possible. Your willingness to explore your life’s choices will help you see yourself for who you are, what you value and what you want moving forward. You may be able to discover ways to engage and interact differently with your husband so that his idiosyncrasies don’t bother you so much. You may be able to find a way to reignite your interest in each other, or you may discover that now is the time for you to part ways. Give yourself the gift of introspection with a professional to help guide you. Then evaluate your next steps.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I find myself feeling jealous of my neighbor who seems to have it all. She has a great job, an attentive boyfriend and even a housekeeper. I am just starting my career -- well, sort of. I graduated from college two years ago and have yet to find a job in my field. I work, but it isn’t a career move. I can barely pay my rent, let alone have a housekeeper. I know I shouldn’t be covetous of this woman’s life, but I find myself envying her. How can I change my attitude? -- New Attitude

DEAR NEW ATTITUDE: Decide to befriend this woman. Consider her an inspiration. Tell her you would like to get to know her and learn from her. Find out how she has built her life so far, what has worked and what challenges she has faced. Over time, discover her story. Decide that she can be an inspiration to you as you design your life.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a male friend who can be very hot and cold. We’ve been friends for more than three years. I don’t see him too often, but whenever I do see him, I can never tell what version of him I am going to get. He can be kind, generous and caring, or he can be cold, blunt and irritable. I think that a part of me has just learned to accept his moodiness.

I love him and value our friendship very much, but I hate that he can be so unpredictable. He knows that he can be moody, as he’s apologized for it in the past. I really want him to work on these parts of his personality, but I am not sure if he’s even capable of that. What should I do? -- Unpredictable

DEAR UNPREDICTABLE: Acceptance can be difficult, especially when a person does something that directly affects your state of mind. Can you ask your friend to check his moodiness? Yes. But know that it likely won’t work. You know your friend as he is. Perhaps he suffers from mental health challenges. Perhaps he is emotionally undisciplined. Perhaps he feels at ease enough to let his hair down when he’s with you. Whatever the case, you need to decide if you can accept him as he is.

That said, you can also tell him that you expect him to think about you, too. When you get together, ask him to remember that this is a two-way street. Ask him to check on you to see how you are doing and to consider how he can treat you to make you happy. You can also tell him how you are doing when you first get together and request whatever support you need in the moment. Don’t expect him to be a mind reader. Tell him.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a 25-year-old woman who identifies as bisexual. One of the toughest things I’ve had to do this year was come out to the people closest to me. Although it was tough to have the conversation, when all was said and done, it was very freeing. Since I’ve come out, I’ve had to remind friends and family that I am not straight on a few separate occasions. When I tell them that I’m going on dates or that I’ve started seeing someone exclusively, they immediately assume that I am talking about a man. It’s annoying and exhausting to keep reminding them. What could this be about? Could they all be in denial? -- Denial

DEAR DENIAL: It took you a long time to reveal your sexual orientation to your family and friends. It will take them time to get used to it. So what if they mistake the gender of your date? Just correct them. You called yourself bisexual. This means that you are interested in both men and women. Because of this, it is incumbent on you to let them know who you are dating so that they are in the loop. Don’t make it a big deal, just a fact.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)