DEAR HARRIETTE: My dad bought me a fake designer purse for my birthday. It was similar to a purse that I had wanted for a very long time, and I could tell that he was so proud that he was able to get it for me. However, I knew it was fake almost immediately. He's always asking why I never use it, and I just don't have the heart to tell him that I can't be seen with this purse. I even considered lying and saying that it was stolen. What do I do? -- Faux Bag

DEAR FAUX BAG: Your dad did the best he could with the resources that he has. I totally understand your objection to a fake version of the designer bag, but I hope you can see his perspective, too. He tried to make you happy. What you can do is wear the bag when you are with him. You can hang it back in your closet the rest of the time.

We are obsessed with labels in this country. As someone who grew up in the fashion industry, I understand the undue pressure that exists to have the right accessory and to be on trend. Sadly, this obsession we have with stuff, especially expensive designer stuff, can be to the detriment of relationships and bank accounts.

Show your father some gratitude and wear the bag proudly around him.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I think it’s time for me to take a little vacation by myself. I am in a relationship, but I really need my alone time. I've been considering this for a while, and I know that I want to go overseas. I plan on being gone for at least a week. How do I tell my partner that I would like to go on a vacation alone without seeming sketchy? We live together, so taking a vacation together wouldn't be super ideal for me. I don't want them thinking that I'm going away to go cheat on them or anything. -- Lone Traveler

DEAR LONE TRAVELER: Be upfront with your partner. The more open and honest you are, the easier it will be to accept your plan. Explain that you are a person who needs alone time. You have long wanted to take a trip by yourself. Now that things are opening up again, you want to plan a personal getaway. Make it clear that this has nothing to do with your relationship, that it’s about you and your need to be by yourself.

If you are asked about the implications of this solo travel on your relationship, be clear about what it means for you -- and what it does not. If it’s true, make the point that cheating isn’t even a thought. Instead, you need to be able to explore, clear your head and just be. You believe this will help you to be more fully present in your life and in your relationship when you return.

Be prepared to talk about it until your partner gets comfortable. Know that this is not so unusual. People figure out all kinds of ways to live their lives. There is no one way.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I think that my brother has a bunch of good ideas, but he never executes them. I'm afraid I'm watching him turn into one of those people who is all talk and no action. He's constantly pitching ideas to our friends and family but never doing anything with them. I know that people are getting sick of him and his lack of follow-through. I even watched my dad loan him money to kickstart his business plan only for him to spend the money on random things. What can I do to make sure he tightens up? I don't want people losing faith in him. -- Just Do It

DEAR JUST DO IT: Your brother might benefit from an entrepreneurial bootcamp where he can learn how to go from thinking about an idea to executing it. There are a lot of dreamers in the world, but far fewer people go the distance and make a plan that they complete. Suggest that your brother consider a particular idea that he is passionate about and then take a class or workshop to learn how to build that idea into a business.

He needs some confidence-boosting to help him realize that he has the potential within him to manifest his dreams. He has to recognize and cultivate that. For a jumpstart, I am hosting a Dreamleapers workshop two-part series in June that may support him and others in going from dream state to activation state. To learn more, visit bit.ly/DLSPRING21.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have spent so much time at home this year because of quarantine that I am afraid to go out. My friends have started to call me to see if we can visit, but I really am scared. I read the reports about people continuing to die from COVID-19 even though many people have been vaccinated. I have been vaccinated myself, but I worry. How can I trust that everybody who is walking around without a mask is safe? I feel like staying in my cocoon at home, but that’s not practical. What should I do? -- Recluse

DEAR RECLUSE: Being in lockdown for so long has created new patterns and concerns for all of us. It is true, though, that the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has relaxed some of the restrictions, including allowing vaccinated people to get together in small groups without masks both outdoors and indoors. This is great news.

Since you remain skittish about the safety of these engagements, feel free to keep your mask on. That’s what I’ve done on the few occasions when I have gotten together with others. Until you feel confident maskless, continue to follow all of the original protocols, but do consider meeting up with loved ones on occasion. It is quite wonderful to be able to see friends face-to-face rather than through a tiny box on your computer. 

Go to the CDC website for specific details on what you can do when fully vaccinated: cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/vaccines/fully-vaccinated.html.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is upset with me because of something that happened in my past. I really have no idea how he found out about it, but it wasn't necessarily a secret. He won't open up to me about why it upsets him or how we can work through it. I don't like how he's reacting. It's unfair of him to shut me out when he wasn't even in my life at the time of the incident. What do I do? -- No Time Like the Present

DEAR NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT: Sit down with your boyfriend and tell him that you need to talk about the elephant in the room. Set it up by saying both of you had lives before you got together. In your case, that includes uncomfortable things that happened before you met. You realize that this particular incident is upsetting to him, and you want to be able to discuss it openly with him. Tell him it makes you uncomfortable that he has shut down about something that happened long ago, that does not affect him and that you cannot change because it is over. Ask him to explain what he is feeling and to talk to you about the situation so that you can find a way forward.

If the issue raises questions about your values or integrity, it may be hard for him to move on even though it didn’t affect him when it happened. Figure out what you think the issue is, and speak directly to that. If, from your perspective, it was a forgivable situation, explain why you think so, and ask him to agree to move on.

It is also true that sometimes our past simply comes back to bite us. Is this one of those incidents?

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently overheard my in-laws making fun of my cooking. I've never claimed to be the best cook, but I try my hardest. My husband's family has always found ways to pick on me, so my cooking was just another thing for them to poke fun at. I personally don't think that they're the best cooks either, so I don't care to ask any of them to teach me anything. I feel like I should address the subject even though they’ve never said anything to my face. How do I address this? Is it even worth addressing? -- Not a Chef

DEAR NOT A CHEF: This is a tricky one, as you don’t want to leave yourself even more vulnerable to your in-laws’ insults. If you can ignore them, that may be for the best. But if you hear their comments again, you might use a humorous challenge to jolt them into realizing how rude they are. For example, you might invite them to a cook-off to see who is worse than the other. Or next time they come over to eat, tell them you are taking the night off and ask them to cook instead of you so that they can show off their great culinary skills.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)