DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been in a relationship for the past six months. My boyfriend and I are happy and in love. A few nights ago, he told me that when we were in our casual dating phase and were not exclusive yet, he was still seeing other women. He told me the names of the girls he was seeing, and I know a few of them very well. I would not have a problem with this, except for the fact that at that time, he told me that he was seeing only me. I'm trying to remain unbothered by this, but it is a little upsetting. I feel like he lied to me so unnecessarily. We've already talked about it, and he promises that it isn’t a big deal. How do I address this? I don't know if I feel comfortable continuing a relationship with a liar. -- Six Months In

DEAR SIX MONTHS IN: Slow down and assess the situation. It sounds like your boyfriend is admitting something to you -- still pretty early in your relationship -- so that he can clear the air. In the early days before people commit to each other, it is not uncommon to withhold information about who else you’re seeing. Should he have told you that you were the only one? No, but I don’t think this is a dealbreaker, especially if you believe that your relationship is going well. You can ask him why he decided to tell you about these other women now. Tell him that it bothers you that he previously lied about it. Talk it out now so that you can move on quickly.

Focus on now and the life you can build for the future. Ask him never to lie to you again.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My roommate and I have been arguing over getting a pet. I'm totally fine with getting a cat or something that could kind of take care of itself and wouldn't be destructive. She really wants a large dog. Our apartment doesn't allow large animals. If we got caught with it, we could get evicted. She is offering to pay whatever pet fees they have, but I am dead set against a dog. I know for a fact that she's been looking at dogs behind my back and plans on probably getting one anyway. I enjoy my roommate; she and I have been friends for years, but I cannot support this decision of hers. I do not want to get evicted, and I don't want to have to kick her out for going against my wishes. What do I do? -- Need New Roommate

DEAR NEED NEW ROOMMATE: Schedule a house meeting with your roommate that is specifically about pets. Be direct with her about your concerns -- you do not agree to a large dog, nor does your building. Point out that you know she has been looking for dogs, and that you are unwilling to lie or sneak in order to have a large dog that can get you both evicted. Tell her that a dog is a dealbreaker. Be sure that you can get her off of your lease, though, before you do that.

If it gets bad enough, you may have to include the landlord in this discussion. If she breaks the rules, figure out how to protect yourself so that she has to go, but not you.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Lately, I've been getting incredibly tired of social media. I see the same posts over and over again and the same people over and over again. I would like to remove myself from my social platform, but I'm also afraid that I'll be missing out. I've been feeling unhappy with the posts of social unrest and people's political views, and it's wearing me out. My question is, how do I maintain my relationships with people on social media while protecting my mental state at the same time? -- Social Distancing

DEAR SOCIAL DISTANCING: Balance is key in life, especially when we’re talking about social media consumption. You are having classic symptoms of what many are experiencing -- social media fatigue. Guess what? It’s perfectly OK, even healthy, to step away from your social media entirely for a while. You can choose for how long. Recognizing that you are in control of your life is a powerful discovery, and it includes the awareness that if you miss out on some posts or even some activities as people slowly begin to start seeing each other again, so be it. It’s not the end of the world. Really!

To figure out the way forward on engaging people on social media, evaluate your network and who really matters to you. Choose to interact with them. Decide whether you want to talk to them beyond social media channels. Is anyone truly your friend? Figure out who matters and why, and from there, determine how closely you want to interact and with what frequency. Less can be more.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend forgot my birthday. We are in a long-distance relationship, so I understand that it could be a little bit more difficult to keep track of holidays, birthdays, etc.; however, I reminded him several times. I am very big on birthdays. When it was my boyfriend’s birthday in July, I went all out for him. When my birthday came around, I got a text from everyone but him. He didn't call me, he didn't text me and he didn't make a Facebook post about me. I love him dearly, and I know for a fact that he forgot. I don't know if I can deal with someone this inconsiderate anymore. He should've had my birthday written down in his calendar. I feel that I deserve more effort. He also forgot Valentine's Day, but I let that slide. Do I continue dating this man who is otherwise very sweet and faithful? I'm embarrassed by the fact that his effort doesn’t match mine. I can't keep making excuses for him anymore. -- Pay Attention

DEAR PAY ATTENTION: I think birthdays are a big deal. It’s understandable that your boyfriend forgetting yours hurt your feelings. Talk to him about it. Ask him why he didn’t make your big day a priority. It’s only a dealbreaker if it points to him not being attentive to you more broadly. If he is otherwise on point, you will have to teach him that he needs to pay attention to your birthday -- and anything else that he misses -- if he wants you to be happy.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend has been looking for a new job for a while, and she finally got a job as a server at a high-end bar and restaurant. The problem is that she wasn’t totally honest with me about what kind of job it actually is. I researched the place and found out that the waitresses are required to wear really revealing outfits. I know how hard it was for her to get this job, but I'm really not comfortable with it. I also wish she had been more honest with me about it from the very beginning. What do I do? -- Deceived

DEAR DECEIVED: Your girlfriend probably didn’t tell you the details of her job because she was afraid you would react exactly as you have. The job market is tough right now for many people, and, sadly, that has meant that some people have had to compromise in terms of the jobs that they felt they had to accept. That has meant looking outside of their fields of study, interests or aptitudes at times. In your girlfriend’s case, the compromise seems to be about values -- at least from your perspective.

Rather than being mad at her, look at it for what it is: She needed a job. Talk to her about it with compassion. You can tell her you are disappointed that she didn’t confide in you. Ask her if the environment is safe. Find out if sexual favors are expected or if there’s any whiff of impropriety there. Admit that this job makes you uncomfortable. But as long as it's safe, offer to support her while she figures things out.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a problem with the way my new boyfriend asked me to be his girlfriend. There was no grand gesture, and it was way too casual for my liking. I did say yes because at the time I was very happy that he even asked me, but now I'm second-guessing. I wish that he had made a bigger deal of it. There was nothing exciting or grand about the way that he asked me. Is it even worth mentioning to him? Should I just get over it and move on? -- Need Effort

DEAR NEED EFFORT: What was missing in your boyfriend’s request? Think about what is upsetting you. Was your boyfriend not romantic enough? What exactly did he say and do? It could be that he realized he really wants to be with you and it felt natural and right, so he said it. That may seem simple, but it’s direct. Some people are like that. It could be that he’s awkward and shy or unceremonious and straightforward.

You need to figure out what is making you disappointed and decide if you can live with that, because your boyfriend probably thinks he made an appropriate gesture. If you really like him, you can introduce him to the ways you like to enjoy special moments. Be ready to accept, however, that he is not a man of grand gestures. That can be OK, too, as long as you figure out how to balance his manner with your expectations.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)