DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend and I have been neighbors for 20 years. For 20 years, she’s been a short walk away from my home; she’s always been there whenever I’ve needed her (and vice versa). Recently, she told me she accepted a position in another state. Although I'm happy for her, I'm devastated that she is moving so far away from me. I'm excited for her to start this next chapter of her life, but it's hard for me to be happy for her knowing that I'm being left behind. How can I be a supportive friend without showing how truly sad I am that she is leaving? -- Losing My Friend

DEAR LOSING MY FRIEND: You two are close, so it’s natural that you would be sad -- devastated, even. It’s also OK to tell her. Chances are, she is feeling emotional about this change in her life, too. What you probably need is to have a good cry with her, swap stories about wonderful memories that you have created together, and help her pack.

Many dear friends are close even when they live many miles apart. This can be true for the two of you. You can still visit each other. Don’t consider this goodbye. Instead, think of it as a new chapter in your lives.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I can't stand my boyfriend’s taste in music. Music is extremely important to me, as I am a recording artist. I believe that music reflects your soul and who you truly are. There isn't a single song that I've played for him that he's liked; he doesn't even like the music I make. I'm not offended that he doesn't like my music because it doesn't tend to attract his demographic anyway, but I'm afraid this is the beginning of a deeper issue for us. I don't like the fact that we can't bond over something as simple as music. Do you think this is a sign of a deeper issue? -- Songstress

DEAR SONGSTRESS: I remember when I met my husband and began to listen to the music that he likes. It was so different from my musical choices. Some of it I liked; some, I didn’t. Now, nearly 30 years later, our musical tastes remain very different. Sometimes when he is listening to his favorite radio station in the car, I pop in my headphones and listen to something else. Often, we take turns listening to each other’s channels when we are driving long distances. The point is: We figured out ways to compromise without judgment. We accept that we like different things.

If you two can come to that agreement and be willing to listen to each other’s music from time to time, it may not become an issue for you. The one trouble spot may be the fact that your boyfriend doesn’t like your music. But even that can be overcome. We don’t always like, understand or appreciate our partner’s work. As long as you two can avoid passing judgment, you can work it out.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve recently started dating a woman who is a lifelong vegan. She is very health-conscious, and she even has a website and YouTube channel dedicated to her plant-based lifestyle. While I admire her dedication to veganism, I myself have never been a vegan, nor do I wish to be.

My girlfriend has “joked” a few times about how she plans to convert me into a full-fledged vegan. Whenever we go out to eat, she gets upset if I choose a meal that has meat in it. I’ve never liked being told how to live my life or feeling like someone is forcing their ways on me. I don’t appreciate the judgment she passes whenever I eat what I want to eat. How can I fix this? -- Non-Vegan

DEAR NON-VEGAN: You two need to have a serious conversation about values and boundaries. Explore what values and beliefs you share. Where do your ideas about life sync up, and where do they not? Talk openly about your beliefs, and consider whether your differences are manageable or too far apart. Talk about the way you eat in this context. It is possible for the two of you to be in a relationship when you don’t eat the same foods, though it won’t be easy. It may require that you both cook, for example, so that when you eat at home, you each get to enjoy the food that you prefer.

You need to directly address her judgment over your eating habits. Explain that you know that her food choices are important to her and you would never stand in her way, but you expect the same respect for your choices. Be clear that you do not want to become a vegan, and you want her to stop proselytizing. Now, if you eat in an unhealthy manner and your body needs to get well, you may want to talk about ways to improve your eating -- but without the judgment.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter recently told me that she wants to move out of state by herself. She just graduated from college and is very independent, but I really want her to stay closer to home without clipping her wings. When I graduated from college, I was engaged to be married, so I left home and moved to a different state from my family, and I deeply regret that. I know that these are different times, but I would still like her to stay close to home. How do I broach the subject without making her feel that I am stopping her from exploring her adult life? -- Empty Nest

DEAR EMPTY NEST: Your job as a parent is to prepare your child to become an adult. That means that you give her the wisdom and knowledge about how to take care of herself without your supervision. This is hard for parents sometimes because on one hand, we want our kids to grow up, but on the other, we want them to stay close to us.

You have to prepare to let go -- now. Allow your daughter to make her own decisions. Let her move wherever she wants to move, and give her your blessing. You can tell her that she is always welcome to come home and that you will miss her terribly, but you have to encourage her to make her own decisions. Do not talk about your regrets right now. That will guilt her. Let her go.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a 20-year-old college student, and my mom recently got engaged to her boyfriend of two years. She’s been a single mom for pretty much my entire life, and I'm nervous about her taking this next step. Her boyfriend seems cool, but I really don't know him all that well since they started dating while I was away at school. I want her to be happy; however, I'm also insecure about losing our closeness. My mom and I are best friends. It's been just the two of us for so long. How can I be more accepting of this change? -- Mom and Me

DEAR MOM AND ME: Your mother’s relationship is only one of two significant changes that you are facing right now, even if you don’t realize it. You are becoming an adult, and you need to step fully into that, which means that you need to be able to be independent of your mother, even as you stay close to her. Interestingly, the fact that she is soon to be married may be a good thing for both of you. Why? Because both of you need to discover how to be independent of each other. Chances are, your mother went through something like this when you went away to college. Becoming an empty nester can be devastating to some parents, especially when they are very close to their children.

Instead of worrying, make a decision to welcome this man into the family, to be happy for your mother and to remain close to her. Talk to your mother about your feelings. Perhaps she will share some of hers, as well. Yes, your relationship will change, but that was going to happen anyway. Welcome the changes, and choose to enjoy the journey.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a Black man living in Columbus, Ohio. My girlfriend -- who is white -- and I have been together for three years and are now discussing marriage, but my parents seem to feel uneasy about this. I asked my fiancee if her parents, being white, were comfortable with us being married. They said they were. But for some reason, my parents aren't quite comfortable with the idea. When I pressed them on it, they said that there’s no way a white woman would be able to fully understand me for who I am, especially in a post-Trump America. I disagree, but I don’t want there to be strife between our families. What do you think I should do? -- Family Feud

DEAR FAMILY FEUD: Sadly, we live in a country that is still plagued by racism. Even so, many mixed-race couples marry and build beautiful lives together. For conditions to be optimal, it would be great if your families got along with each other and with the two of you. Your parents can have their skepticism. Rather than arguing with them about their beliefs, focus on building your life with your fiancee. Talk through all of your issues and concerns. Be open about race, discrimination and social justice issues. Figure out where each of you stands on the hot topics of the day -- and where your values lie. You will have to stand up to plenty more people than your parents, so test it out to see how strong the two of you are in your beliefs and willingness to fight for your life together.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)