DEAR HARRIETTE: My ex-fiance and I have been broken up for four years now. We got engaged in our early 20s and never got married. Our relationship lasted three years. Over the past year, he and I started communicating again. The more we communicate, the more I find myself wondering if we made a mistake by calling off our engagement. Neither of us is in a serious relationship at the moment. I’m curious whether or not I should give this another go.
We didn’t break up because of abuse, infidelity or any serious reason; we broke up because we were young and disillusioned with how we thought a potential marriage should be. We have no kids. Am I being unrealistic for thinking we could give it another go? -- Second-Guessing
DEAR SECOND-GUESSING: Young love is often fleeting because of bad timing. When you have an opportunity to revisit an old relationship that was positive but became too close too soon, why not go for it?
Start with an honest conversation. You can say that since you two have been communicating again, you realize how much you appreciate him and your friendship. If you have missed him, tell him. Ask how he feels. No need to make this a confessional. Instead, just start talking openly about your feelings.
If you want to date him again, say so. Since the two of you are free and single and still care about each other, it could be lovely to explore this and see what unfolds.