DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in the heart of Atlanta (close to the airport) in a small apartment. When my friends fly into the city for the weekend, they will usually ask to stay at my home, even though my space is small and it will inconvenience me. I am seriously considering charging them to stay at my place as often as they do; for obvious reasons, I am hesitant to ask. My friends live in D.C., LA and Florida, so their flights will often connect in Atlanta. I understand that it’s convenient for them, but I would feel more comfortable if they paid to use my space and amenities. Do you think this is too extreme? What would you suggest I do? -- Hartsfield Hotel

DEAR HARTSFIELD HOTEL: Rather than requiring that your friends pay you for the privilege of staying at your home, which could ring wrong, just tell them no. “No” is a complete sentence. You do not have to agree to serve as a hotel for your friends. Instead, you can welcome them to visit you occasionally when the purpose of their visit is to be with YOU.

If they say that they really can’t afford to stay at a hotel and they want to come there and spend time during their layover, explain that it is inconvenient for you -- and costly. If they continue to press, this is when you can request some kind of fee for replenishing your amenities and cleaning your house. That seems fair.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend’s firm belief in certain conspiracy theories is starting to make me resent her. She and I have been together for about a year now; when we first met, COVID-19 was just beginning to spread. She told me at the height of the pandemic that she thought the virus was caused by 5G phone signals (which is ridiculous), and at first I would laugh it off. Now, a year later, I’ve lost two relatives and a close friend to COVID. She still insists that COVID is some sort of conspiracy, even after watching me grieve because of it. Her theories are offensive and harmful, and I don’t know how to approach the situation without causing a huge fight. How should I approach this? I don’t want us to break up. -- COVID Conspiracy

DEAR COVID CONSPIRACY: You need to have a real and raw conversation with your girlfriend. Apart from her conspiracy theory beliefs, she has shown herself to be insensitive to you and your family’s losses. Tell her that this hurts your feelings and has to stop. Further, point out that her extreme views make you uncomfortable.

You can agree to talk about anything with your girlfriend, but I encourage you both to do your research and come with fact-based information, not oft-repeated theories. There is a lot of research out there about COVID-19, what it is and how it affects human beings. You may want to share what you have learned with her, from reputable sources. But in the end, you will have to decide if you can live with someone who fundamentally doesn’t share your values. Sometimes things can be overlooked -- not always.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m beginning to think that my family is the only one left who is doing any form of quarantining. My other friends seem to have stopped being strict about what they or their kids do. When I talk to them, they are headed for a road trip or to a family gathering. They are out and about. My kids are mad at me and my husband because we will not let them hang out with friends. Even though it looks like the numbers are going down on COVID-19 spread, they are still pretty high, and most people don’t have the vaccine yet. Am I being too strict to keep my family mostly at home? My husband and I both have preexisting conditions. I don’t want any of us to become a statistic because we were impatient. -- When To Go Out

DEAR WHEN TO GO OUT: People are venturing out more these days. One doctor told me that the reality is that we are all going to have to learn how to protect ourselves and live our lives, as it will still take a long time before most people are protected from this deadly virus. Does that mean you should act like business as usual? Absolutely not. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention strongly recommends that when you go out to wear a mask -- two even these days -- and stay at least six feet away from others, wash your hands regularly and limit any close interaction with others to less than 15 minutes whenever possible. People are doing this AND spending a bit more time in the company of other people, preferably outside.

When exposed to the virus, people are asked to quarantine for 10 to 14 days. When they contract the virus, they are asked to isolate for a similar period of time. The goal is to contain the spread of the virus as vigorously as possible -- and to live our lives. For more CDC wisdom, go to: cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/if-you-are-sick/quarantine.html.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Whatever I say to my husband these days, he shuts down. I feel like I could say the sky is blue on a sunny day, and he would immediately say that it’s obviously about to rain. I don’t get it. He always has to be right, and it seems like he just wants me to be quiet. It has gotten worse over the past year. He lost his job because the place where he worked shut down due to the pandemic. I’m the one working, but we are all pitching in. It’s just that he seems to have a chip on his shoulder, and everything is directed at me. I’m exhausted by it. I feel the pressure of having to bring in all of the money in order to pay our bills. I don’t appreciate being second-guessed and doubted and yelled at constantly over nothing -- on top of the other stress. I get that men can take it extra hard when they lose work, but I can’t keep giving him a pass. What can I do? -- Off the Rails

DEAR OFF THE RAILS: Sit down with your husband, and clearly ask him to be kinder to you. Tell him you know how tough this period has been for him and the family -- and that includes you. Don’t state the obvious about how you are financially carrying the family. That will only hurt more. Point out that he has been extremely critical of you, and it hurts your feelings. Firmly invite him to be more thoughtful and supportive of you when you interact. Keep giving him examples if he needs to see what you are talking about.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: A guy who went to college with me calls every six months or so, always wanting me to hook him up. By the second sentence of the call, the ask is there, and it’s always for a significant favor that is far beyond my scope of interest, network or anything else. This guy is pushy and gross, as far as I am concerned. But we do share the bond of going to the same college a thousand years ago. I do my best to help anybody from my school that I can. But this has gotten out of control. How can I get him to back off? I have tried so many things, including hardly ever being able to help -- not because I am holding back, but more because I really can’t. -- Enough

DEAR ENOUGH: It is OK to stop engaging this man. If he has shown himself to you to be a taker and a user without ever reciprocating, you can make the choice that you do not have to talk to him anymore. That can be as simple as you no longer accepting his calls. Period.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister and I started a weight loss program at the beginning of the year, and we are continuing to do it the best we can. My sister, however, is doing much better than me. She is down almost 20 pounds. I’m down 7 and struggling to keep that off. Never mind I want to lose 40. I need to. She is probably 5 pounds from her goal already. I’m beginning to feel like a loser because I am going so much slower than my sister. She is very encouraging to me, but I’m at a loss. I have changed my eating habits. I am exercising with a trainer twice a week. What am I doing wrong? -- Not Fit

DEAR NOT FIT: It is wonderful for you and your sister to encourage each other, but do your best not to compete. You are two different people with different bodies, metabolism, etc. You are different, and your bodies are responding to your fitness and nutrition changes accordingly. The good news is that you are losing. Keep up the momentum. Doctors say that nutrition is even more important than exercise when it comes to weight loss, though both are essential for your overall health. Talk to your sister about exactly what she eats -- and what she doesn’t. You may get some further inspiration from her about her food choices. If you need to lose 40 pounds for health reasons, you may want to visit a nutritionist who can recommend a particular eating strategy for your body that will help you to reach your goal. It is important to follow an eating plan that works for you and that is not so strict that it could harm your body or provide only temporary results. I mention this because many people are gung-ho at the beginning of the year and begin to follow extreme weight loss programs only to find themselves having gained back whatever they lost plus some once they come off of it. Don’t do that. Decide on a strategy with your medical professional and stick to it. What I have learned that works for most people as a general rule is to eat less sugar, less salt, less meat, less fatty food, less processed food and more organic food, and to drink more water.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)