DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I have been married for six years and have two beautiful children (ages 2 and 3). About a year ago -- around the time the pandemic started -- I lost my job. At first, my husband was extremely sympathetic and supportive about my struggle to find new work, but now it seems his patience is wearing thin. He makes passive aggressive remarks about being “the only one who pays the bills” and gets angry with me when I spend “too much money” on groceries.

I think he’s looking at it the wrong way. Because of the virus, our kids have not resumed school, and I think it’s convenient that I am able to take care of them during the day. If I were working right now, we’d be spending thousands per month on child care. I’ve had no luck in finding a new job, and, honestly, I do not really want to do anything but stay home and care for my kids. What should I do? -- Mom of Two

DEAR MOM OF TWO: Sadly, women have fared the worst during the COVID-19 pandemic. Millions have lost their jobs. According to a McKinsey report (bit.ly/372FpV3), women are 1.8 times more likely to lose their jobs during the pandemic than men and currently represent 54% of the current job losses in our country. Moms of young children have it especially hard, as you see, because of child care challenges.

You and your husband need to talk openly and honestly about life as it is today. The stress is real for both of you. Together, you have to figure out a way forward. Make a budget that is as lean as possible. Get support if you need it, including visiting a local food bank. Agree to work through this together. You can also look for online work, like telemarketing or data entry, with flexible hours that you can do from home.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a feeling that my best friend is lying to me about still seeing her ex. They were together for quite some time, and while he did several awful things to her over the course of their relationship, the final straw for her was when she found out he was cheating with one of her classmates. She cried over him for days and swore she would never speak to him again. That was about two months ago.

We each have access to location services on the other’s phone, so I can see everywhere she goes. Most nights -- when she leaves her location on -- I can see that she’s at his apartment complex. I understand that in the grand scheme of things, it isn’t really my business, but that’s not how our friendship works. We’re always supposed to be 100% honest with each other and promise not to judge. While I wouldn’t approve of them being back together, it does hurt that she doesn’t think she can tell me about it. Should I ask her directly? I’m scared to overstep and cause a rift. -- Suspicious

DEAR SUSPICIOUS: Your friend is probably worried that you will judge her. Ask her if she is OK. Ask if she is seeing her ex again. Encourage her to talk about what’s going on in her life. Suggest that she spend some time alone so she can sort through her feelings. Remind her that you are there for her -- always.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have recently gained a lot of attention through social media (Instagram specifically) as a brand influencer. I get paid a substantial amount of money to simply take a few pictures and promote brands from all over the world.

My friends don’t seem to be supportive of my career at all. Whenever I mention a new sponsorship or brand endorsement, they veer the conversation in another direction almost immediately. They never ask about the work I do, but when I mention it, they are quick to downplay my accomplishments. They’ve made comments asking if I was still interested in a “real job” before. I’m proud of the work I do and attention I’ve gained -- why can’t my friends seem to be proud of me as well? -- Influencer

DEAR INFLUENCER: You are going to need to get recognition for your professional accomplishments from other sources outside of your friend group. That may seem sad to you, since you are close to these people, but know that it isn’t unusual for friends and loved ones to not “get” you in certain ways. It is possible for people to sincerely love you without understanding or appreciating the work that you do or the contributions that you make in other parts of your life.

In your case, you are involved in a relatively new means of earning a living. For some, it may seem trendy and possibly fleeting. They may not understand and may have opinions based on whatever they think an “influencer” is. Rather than fretting over how to convince them of your value, plot your course. Figure out how you can build your reputation and your business. The main caution I would offer is that as you align yourself with various brands, make sure that you do so only when the brand is reflective of your values. Those simple posts that you describe that go all over the world represent you and what you stand for. I strongly suggest that you evaluate each brand, each photo and each post before you put them into the universe. Once it’s out there, you cannot take it back.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been with my boyfriend for about two months now. When I first met him, I noticed he had quite a few woman friends he was very close with. It was never an issue for me before we began dating officially, but now I find myself becoming increasingly uncomfortable with some of his friendships. On his birthday, one of his woman friends wrote a very long and intimate birthday post on Facebook. Another woman friend sent him what looked like an expensive floral arrangement on that same day. I don’t want to seem insecure or crazy, but I think they are overstepping, and I wish he would set some boundaries. What should I do? -- Uncomfortable

DEAR UNCOMFORTABLE: You are new in your relationship, and it seems like you want to deepen your commitment. It’s time to talk to your boyfriend. Tell him what you are hoping for with him, and note that some of his woman friends seem a bit territorial and intimate with him. Ask him to get them to give you two space. Suggest that he let them know that you two are exclusive now, and he’s off the market.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I live in a neighborhood that got hit hard by snow recently. I told my sons to go around the neighborhood and ask if they could help people shovel out their driveways. When I was growing up, we used to do that for a few dollars. We don’t have as much snow these days, but I thought it would be good for my boys in terms of helping out and also making some money. Turns out, people did let them shovel their driveways, but several of them didn’t offer the boys a dime for doing it.

I am really disappointed. My boys worked sometimes for hours to dig out cars and paths. At the very least, they should have been offered a healthy tip. Do you think I should say something to the homeowners who were so stingy? My boys are high schoolers, so they should have spoken up and negotiated a rate on the front end, but I hate seeing them being taken advantage of. -- Snow Days

DEAR SNOW DAYS: Your boys should have been clear with the neighbors that they were offering to clear the snow for a particular price. When negotiations are handled up front, everybody is clear, and misunderstandings diminish. Of course, the neighbors should have offered the boys something. But their rudeness is your boys’ problem, not yours. They need to navigate talking to adults and standing up for themselves. If there is another snowstorm, tell them to make a price list for services that they say before the work begins.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m feeling old and washed up. I do good work that people acknowledge me for, but my universe is very small. I keep up on social media, but I have a tiny footprint compared to my friends and peers. Whenever people start talking about their social media, I get nervous. If they go and look at mine, they will see that I don’t have the thousands of followers that they do. I want to be competitive in my field, but I worry that it’s too late for me. When my friends were building up their social profiles, I was raising my family. Now I feel like it’s too late for me. What should I do? -- Poor Social Media

DEAR POOR SOCIAL MEDIA: Believe it or not, the world doesn’t solely revolve around social media. Create a narrative that speaks to your uniqueness and how you and your services may be of value to others. Spend time thinking about this so that you can clearly emphasize who you are and why others should be interested in you and what you have to offer.

Simultaneously, consider hiring a PR firm that specializes in social media to help you build your social footprint. It is not too late to bolster your presence. But know that you can promote who you are through more traditional means, including word of mouth, which will always be important.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)