DEAR HARRIETTE: I did one of those popular diets for the month of January, and I am so mad. I did it because I need to lose weight; sitting around at home during COVID-19 and eating whenever I want to has not helped me at all. But starving myself for a month didn’t help either. My stomach was constantly upset, and I didn’t even lose much weight. I did notice what my cravings are because my patterns were disrupted. But still, I’m left in the same position that I started in: I need to lose weight. What should I do? -- Need To Lose

DEAR NEED TO LOSE: Go get a physical from your doctor. Figure out the status of your health, and ask for a referral to a nutritionist. You can work with this person to assess your current eating habits and consider healthier options. You should also incorporate exercise into your daily routine. Don’t let the effect of the interminable quarantine make you unhealthy. Incorporate a few modifications into your daily life, and track your success.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like I don’t have any friends. When I was out and about, working and socializing, it felt completely different. I was always the belle of the ball, so to speak. My work was very social, and I knew a lot of people who acted like they wanted to be around me. Now that we can’t go anywhere, I realize that most of those people have disappeared. I have one girlfriend who I have talked to consistently over all these months. The rest -- poof! When I have reached out to some of the people I thought were my friends, it fell flat. Should I just let them go? I feel like such a loser. -- No Friends

DEAR NO FRIENDS: My mother used to say that you were lucky if you could count your friends on one hand. That’s all you need. Many people are acquaintances. Few are true friends. If you have one good friend, hold onto her -- especially after the world opens up again. Don’t take her for granted. The others are part of your social circle. Don’t be mad at them. Just realize who they are and the purpose they serve in your life. The mistake that many people make is attempting to turn relationships into something that they are not.

Use this reflective time to assess your relationships. Who fits into what category? If you identify anyone outside of your one friend who could be a true friend, decide to cultivate that bond. Be attentive, and let that person know how much you value him or her in your life.

When you are clear about the roles that people play in your world, you can manage your feelings and expectations better. It will be easier for you to know who can keep a secret, who gives great advice, who is good for a night on the town, who is a great connector, etc. Being aware in this way will make you a winner!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Since the pandemic started, my husband has been working at home. He still has his job, thank God, but he hardly ever goes in. I’m so worried that he will end up losing his job. He is already a senior citizen. I can’t imagine what he will do if he has to look for work. He has been taking real estate investing courses, but I can’t envision him doing that successfully. My husband is not a salesman in any way. He refuses to speak up at work to say he is available for an assignment. In real estate, you have to hustle. It’s all about being assertive and putting yourself out there. I know my husband means well, but I think it’s unrealistic for him to believe that he will be able to grow a real estate business when he lacks the people skills that go with it. How can I encourage him to make a responsible choice without hurting his feelings? I’m scared to death that we will end up with nothing if he continues down this path. I work, by the way, but I don’t make enough money to take care of the both of us. -- Supporting My Man

DEAR SUPPORTING MY MAN: Tread lightly. Since your husband has chosen a second career, you don’t want to dash his hopes. Instead, encourage him to role-play with you. What will he be doing if he is in real estate? Ask him to practice on you. How will he pitch to a potential buyer? What would a day look like? Encourage your husband to talk through all of the details of this new line of work so that he can see for himself what it will look like. Let him discover through these conversations whether he believes he has the aptitude for it. Additionally, talk to him about retirement and how you will be able to manage as a family. Do not give up. Keep the conversation going so that you can get to the topics that must be discussed.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was going through some boxes and things, trying to organize my house, and I came across some old love letters that I had written to a man I used to date many moons ago. While we dated way before I met my husband, I bet that these letters would be disturbing for him to find. I kept them for so long because of the nostalgia. I really loved this man. I think that I should dispose of them, but I’m finding it hard to do. What do you think? -- Letting Go

DEAR LETTING GO: Put yourself in your husband’s shoes. How would you feel if you came across some of his old love letters? It’s time to shred them, burn them or otherwise safely dispose of them. Live in the present. It’s safer and can be more fulfilling.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was just looking back at old photos of my family. A little more than a year ago, we hosted a pretty extravagant party for my mother’s birthday. All of her friends came, and it was beautiful to be with everyone. Even though all of her friends are aging, they were doing pretty well.

A year later, after quarantining for so long, it’s just terrible how they are. My mother has suffered tremendous memory loss; I’m sure it’s due to the isolation. She survived COVID-19 -- as did a few of her friends -- but it took a lot out of them. I want to do something for them to motivate them to live, but we still can’t get together. Do you have any ideas? -- Inspiring the Elders

DEAR INSPIRING THE ELDERS: One of the ravages of COVID-19 is social life. This has been difficult to manage, especially for older people. Memory loss is one of many side effects that people have been reporting about their loved ones during this time. If your mother and her friends have access to electronic tablets with screens large enough for them to easily see images on them, you may be able to use technology to create a virtual event for them.

Plan a date and time when everybody joins a videoconferencing call. You can use Zoom, Skype, FaceTime or some other technological platform. For those who are living with adult children, caregivers can help. For those living in retirement communities or nursing homes, ask management to let them borrow a tablet. They should be able to set it up and get everyone together. In this way, the friends can see and talk to each other, preferably prompted by some of you. Don’t make the gathering too big. Instead, you may want to organize several smaller groups so that everybody gets a chance to talk.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Dating during COVID-19 sucks. I had just started talking to a guy at school when everything got shut down. We all went home for what turned out to be months. He and I kept “talking” via social media, but it didn’t amount to much. Now we are back at college, but it’s awkward. I saw him the other day, but students are all keeping our distance. Plus, nothing ever really started with this guy. I thought we might like each other, but we didn’t get the chance. Should I ask him if he would like to get together? I liked him enough before to want to get to know him better. He seems nice. I really don’t know what to do. -- Next Steps

DEAR NEXT STEPS: If you are interested in this guy, reach out to him and be direct. Remind him that just as you two were getting to know each other last year, the pandemic put a stop to everything. Ask him if he would like to (safely) get together now to do something normal, like see each other in person and talk. Chances are, you will get a simple yes or no. Take it from there.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)