DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like I am always fussing these days. At work, everybody seems on edge, and I am, too. At home, my husband and I seem to go at it about the littlest things. It’s all too much. Being cooped up for a whole year without the normal ways that we could blow off steam is taking its toll on my mood -- and it’s not just me. Everybody around me seems to be affected. I don’t want to be stuck in this bad mood. What can I do? -- No More Bad Mood

DEAR NO MORE BAD MOOD: Good for you for calling out how you feel and noticing that it may be bigger than just a momentary thing. Many people are feeling tense right now. It has been a very long time that we have been either quarantined or dramatically limited in the ways in which we can engage others. And human beings need to be together, while too much togetherness, like your situation at home, can also feel stifling.

Some folks dream about things going back to normal, but as the great spiritual adviser Iyanla Vanzant recently told me, we have to accept “the now.” The past is just that: past, gone. Whenever the pandemic truly passes and the world opens up again, things will be different, and there’s no going back. So your attitude needs to change. I’ve started getting flowers at the grocery store and putting them on my desk. I practice remembering to be kind when I talk to everyone, including the people in my house. I choose more often to start every engagement with positive words and a smile. Try these simple ways of claiming joy.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m no writer, but I have so much to say. I have this idea to teach and share my knowledge with others, and many of my peers think that aside from running my own seminars, I should write a book. I know I can easily take the format of what I have been saying time and time again during my group talks and mentoring and write it all down, but even if I were to get all my thoughts and ideas down on paper, where do I go from there? How does a book go from an idea to being printed and put on shelves? Do I pay to publish my book, or does a company have to like my book enough to buy it and publish it? You're a published writer -- where do I start? -- Starting My Book

DEAR STARTING MY BOOK: Many people who are not writers hire ghostwriters to help them put their ideas on paper and turn them into books. This has become a big industry that you may want to tap into.

You can also try to do it yourself. Decide what you want to write about. Is it a memoir? Is it a manual attendees would use to complement your seminars? What is the book? Next, find a writer’s workshop to help you develop your ideas as you write. Hire an editor to get your content tight. You can self-publish, which is common these days, and sell your books directly through your seminars. To get a book published by a traditional publisher, you will need to secure a literary agent, show your reach (social media footprint, audience) and sell your idea to a publisher.

All are possible, but if you already have a good following through your seminars, you may want to choose the self-publishing route to start. It’s quicker and easier, and you will have a built-in potential buyer base.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve been applying for jobs, and they all get back to me at different times. After interviewing with one place, I was offered a job and started working. I had worked there for two weeks when I received a call for an interview for another job. I made time to do that interview remotely, and I was offered the job that day. I really love the new job, but I already accepted the other one. I’ve never been in this position where I have a choice of where I can work. I want to take this other job, but I feel weird leaving the first employer so soon after telling them how greatly appreciative and excited I was to work with them. How do I ethically leave this job for another one? -- Retracting My Acceptance

DEAR RETRACTING MY ACCEPTANCE: Take a pause and evaluate both jobs. Are you sure that this other job is a much better fit? In order to make such an abrupt move after accepting a position, it should be well worth the inconvenience to your current employer and the blow to your reputation. You run the risk of being labeled by your current company as untrustworthy, flaky or dishonorable -- not a label you would want.

But if the new offer is truly in sync with your career goals and your gut tells you that this is the right way to go, you can consider it. You should be upfront with the new employer, for starters. Tell them that you are interested, but you already accepted a different position and you need to give the current employer at least two weeks’ notice, if they want it. If the new employer agrees, go to your current boss and break the news. Be honest and respectful. Explain that as much as you like the job you have, this other one is a better fit for your career goals. Apologize profusely. If you signed a contract that has a time commitment, this could be moot.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been wearing sweats and T-shirts for the past year as we have been isolated during COVID-19, and it’s not good. I had to go to a socially distanced event for my family last weekend, and when I went to put on some real clothes, nothing fit. I don’t know how much weight I have gained, but it’s enough to erase my wardrobe. I don’t have the money to replace my clothes, and I don’t want to stay this size. What should I do? -- Nothing Fits

DEAR NOTHING FITS: Now is the time to get up and move. Many of us have been stuck still for so long that even the daily movement of walking from here to there to get to work or to the grocery store or to an appointment has evaporated. You can claim that back. Start by doing simple exercises to get you moving at home. You can go online to find workout classes that you can join virtually.

You should get a physical to check on your overall health, and ask to talk to a nutritionist. Because you aren’t moving much, you should eat less. Makes sense, right? Replace other beverages with water. Eat little or no sugar. Reduce your portion sizes. Rather than going extreme, if you can cut back a bit on everything -- and follow your doctor’s recommendations -- you should be able to slim down over time. Good luck!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend and I are pretty competitive when it comes to sports and gambling; it’s what we have always done since college. We get hurt -- like bumps and bruises -- but end up fine. We laugh it off and get back up, no problem. We gamble and make bets on games and random things. We do silly and crazy dares.

Recently, I got a new job that came with a signing bonus. While we were having one of our competitive nights, we made some bets, and I felt invincible putting up my big check. My friend, being my friend, matched it. I won, and he lost. I knew he could not afford to pay up, but he wrote me a check anyway. Now he won’t talk to me. I gave the money back to him, but his pride won’t let him keep it. I feel like a villain for winning. I don’t know how to fix this. What should I do? -- Sore Loser

DEAR SORE LOSER: Time will be the healer in this situation. What happened goes far beyond that competitive moment. In your moment of invincibility, you revealed to your friend that you have won a bigger competition, which neither of you may have realized you were in -- namely, that of the bigger paycheck and the uptick in your career.

All of the games that you two have played over the years show how competition lives at your core. Naturally, it would show its face when things get real. All you can do is let time take care of it. You were out of turn in waving the flag of your bonus in his face. After things cool off a bit, you can text or call him and invite him to engage again, like usual. Eventually, you should be able to establish a refreshed rapport.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband curses a lot these days. Even though we have two young children and I ask him repeatedly to curb his language, he just doesn’t seem to care anymore. He used to reserve his profanity for our private conversations, but now he can’t be bothered. My youngest, who is 7, just used curse words when speaking to me. I was mortified. I do not want my children to think that cursing is acceptable. How can I get my husband to stop? -- No More Potty Language

DEAR NO MORE POTTY LANGUAGE: Carve out a private moment with your husband when the children are asleep and you two are alert. Tell him you want to talk about something serious. Then go for it. Reveal that your youngest is now cursing, and you are concerned. Point out that your husband's constant profanity is fueling this. You want to teach the children to use appropriate, respectful language, and you need his support. Ask him to agree NOT to curse around them. Pick replacement words and phrases that you agree on. Push until he agrees.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)