DEAR HARRIETTE: My son is only 7 years old, and I think he is experiencing puberty already. He explained to me what an erection is, but he doesn’t understand why it happens when it does. I have been so nervous about the coming questions because of his age. I’m worried that he will begin to understand what it means. He’s way too young to experience those types of feelings and urges. I was prepared to have this conversation when he was 13 years old. What do I do, and how do I explain what is happening to him, while ensuring his innocence for a few more years? -- Mama’s Growing Boy

DEAR MAMA’S GROWING BOY: I did some reading on this subject, and I am happy to report that you shouldn’t have anything to be worried about. Medical professionals say that it is natural for a young child to occasionally have an erection. It doesn’t necessarily mean that he is going into puberty prematurely.

The wisdom I gleaned suggests that you tell your son the basics about his body, starting with the fact that the penis (yes, call it by its name) has the primary function of urinating. That’s what it’s for. Add to that: occasionally it changes in shape and size. Just like an eye twitch or a kneejerk, it sometimes moves or changes a bit. It always comes back to normal after a while.

Experts suggest that you need not talk about what an erection is and how the penis functions as a sexual organ when your child is that young. However, they do suggest that you let your son know that no one should touch his penis other than himself; that he should keep it clean; and that because it is his private area, he should not expose it to others. For more information about puberty go to: pediatricgroup.com/puberty_boys.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I asked my husband if we could have a moratorium on watching the news during the holidays. He thought I was crazy. He is glued to political news, day in and day out. I want a break. I hate walking into the room and listening to the pundits drone on about the issues and how bad the other side is. What can I do to get some peace in my house? -- Turn It Off

DEAR TURN IT OFF: If you have more than one TV in your house, ask your husband to watch his news in a room other than the family room. If he watches in your bedroom, ask him to turn it off before it’s time for you to go to bed -- or better yet, in another room.

Acknowledge that you know that he is addicted to the news, but that you need a respite from it. My mentor told me that while she does listen to the news every day, she stops after 8 p.m. She said that if she continues watching into the night, it negatively impacts her sleep. Work with your husband to create boundaries around the TV. Perhaps that will give you at least some of the peace that you crave.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I really put my foot in my mouth. I was celebrating a member of my family when I was speaking in a public forum, and I said something that hurt my aunt’s feelings. I feel so bad about that. My intent was to raise her up and let people know how great I think she is. I have apologized, but I wonder if there’s anything else I can do. She said it was all right, but she definitely was not happy when we talked about it. -- Mend a Fence

DEAR MEND A FENCE: What occurred is over. What happens in the future, you can control. Do you know exactly why your aunt was hurt? Was it what you said or how you said it? Be clear on the nature of the offense; otherwise, you could unwittingly repeat it. Moving forward, do not tell stories about people in your life, naming names, unless you have checked with them first. Make sure that they agree to have their identities revealed before you talk about them in a public forum.

I say that, all the while knowing that one of my favorite writers, David Sedaris, writes in detail about his family all the time -- without their permission. And he has said that sometimes they get mad. He does it anyway. Even though he has made millions of dollars off of what some might call exploiting his family, I don’t recommend it. Check with them first.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have several family members who are mad at me. A week before Thanksgiving, they asked if they could come to dinner at my house. At that point, the authorities were already saying that it was unsafe to do. So, I put the kibosh on it right then and there. One of my nieces told me that I was being selfish and that she was never going to visit me again. I held my ground. I am in my 60s with several health challenges, and I thought I should follow the guidelines. Then I saw that lots of people didn’t. Travel skyrocketed during Thanksgiving. I pray that we don’t have too many people getting sick behind it. Meanwhile, my niece is not talking to me. How can I get her back and still protect myself? -- Rift

DEAR RIFT: You did the right thing. By all medical and scientific accounts that I have seen, being overly cautious is the only safe way to go right now. The guidance given for Thanksgiving will likely extend through New Year’s. This is with the intention of slowing the spread of this invisible, insidious disease. Whether you had health challenges or not, you should have followed the strict guidelines NOT to sit down to eat with people other than those living in your home.

That said, to regain your niece’s closeness, reach out to remind her of how much you love her. Tell her that you hope she is practicing safe engagement with others. Let her know you hope to see her as soon as COVID-19 is less of a threat. It may take time, but you need to play the long game now.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is a high school junior. It is time for her to take her SATs, but I learned that the test is not required this year due to COVID-19. But then I also heard that if she takes the SAT or ACT, it will make it easier for her to be attractive to colleges and universities if she does well.

My daughter is so stressed out because of doing school remotely and being isolated from her friends while she has tons of homework. I don't want to push her too hard, but I do think she should take the SAT. She isn't thinking about it at all right now. What do you think? -- Take The Test

DEAR TAKE THE TEST: I'm old school on this one. I agree that if your daughter takes the SAT or ACT, she will set herself up for the best options for college. The more information that schools have to evaluate students, the better.

I have spoken to guidance counselors who agree that students should prepare for the test, figure out which test, SAT or ACT, is better for their skills and temperament, and take the test. Many colleges and universities are still offering scholarships to students who test well and whose overall transcripts and personal stories are inspiring.

Do your best to motivate your daughter to be as active as she can, even if it's via videoconferencing, and as engaged in the testing process as she has bandwidth to do. It's worth it. 

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter got divorced last year. It was sad for our family, but we supported her. Her ex-husband had become very close to the family, as they were married for about 20 years. They had no children, but he certainly was part of the family.

Recently, he has been calling. When the pandemic started, he checked in to see how the family was doing. He has offered to bring groceries to me and my husband. He calls us once a month to check and see how we are doing. It is very sweet.

My daughter learned that he has been calling, and she hit the roof. She told us that we should stop talking to him since they got divorced. This is making it awkward. It's actually been nice to hear from him. I don't want to hurt my daughter, but I also don't want to reject him. What should I do? -- In the Middle

DEAR IN THE MIDDLE: Talk to your daughter about why she is so upset. Ask her to tell you why they broke up and if he did something unforgivable that you should know about. If he did, you may reconsider your position.

Otherwise, tell her that you appreciate his calls. He has been a part of your family for so long, you don't mind when he checks in. Assure her that you aren't trying to keep him close. However, he has been very thoughtful, and you appreciate it.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)