DEAR HARRIETTE: My father is in a nursing home, and he recently fell. He needs more care than this place has to offer. My sister, who lives in the area, has been handling things, but now we have to make tough decisions. She has been asking me and my brother to weigh in so that she doesn’t have to do everything herself. I feel weird about that.

Since I’m not there, how can I really be of help? I can’t see what’s going on with him, while she has much more access. I feel like she should have full authority to do whatever she thinks is right. My brother, on the other hand, has lots of opinions. She seems to be OK with what he has to say. I feel uncomfortable chiming in. What do you recommend that I do? -- Daddy Issues

DEAR DADDY ISSUES: It can feel burdensome for the local adult child to have to make all the decisions for an ailing parent. Your sister has asked for your opinion because she values it and needs it. It actually is selfish of you not to share your thoughts, whatever they are. Your sister honestly needs your support.

Pay close attention to what’s happening with your father. Do research when required. Learn as much as you can about what he is facing so that you can offer informed recommendations or thoughts when she asks. You can also be crystal clear that while you are happy to supply information, you defer to her in the decision-making, as she is the one on the ground seeing the situation play out in real time.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My employer recently informed us that we will not go back into the office physically until next year sometime -- probably not until midyear. I have an expensive apartment and have been thinking about giving up my lease and moving to my dream town. Right now, I live in Manhattan, and I feel like I’m too physically close to people to be safe moving about. So I just stay inside all the time.

Where I want to move is much less densely populated, and I know I can take hikes and fish and enjoy the outdoors without being too close to anyone. I can work from there, enjoy the great outdoors and save money without anybody being the wiser. I won’t keep it a secret, but it doesn’t matter where I live as long as I get my work done. Do you think it is smart for me to give up my New York City digs and go on a once-in-a-lifetime adventure? -- Making a Move

DEAR MAKING A MOVE: You are part of a growing group of people who are moving during the age of COVID-19. Many people have moved back home with their parents to save money and be quarantined together. Others have given up expensive homes to save money, and some -- like you -- are using this moment to check an item off their bucket lists. I say go for it! When the dust settles, trust that you will find the right place to live.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son is in high school and wants to start taking guitar lessons. I want to give my son the best opportunity to succeed, but the truth is I can’t afford any private lessons right now. I have taken the steps to learn how to read sheet music so that I can teach him and we can learn together. But I’m not sure I can go as far as learning how to play the guitar from YouTube videos. I have tried to get him interested in other things that I can afford, but ever since he was a young boy, I have never seen him this passionate about wanting to start something new. How do I let him down easy and break it to him that the lessons are just out of reach for us right now? -- A Mother Making It Work

DEAR A MOTHER MAKING IT WORK: Your son is in high school, and he is passionate about the guitar. He is the one who should be scouring YouTube videos teaching himself how to read music and play. He is at the age where he needs to begin discovering his independence. Suggest that he do all the research he needs online to learn all that he can. While he may not have a physical guitar, he can learn how to play guitar music from his computer. He can also research online music classes that may be free.

You do not have to feel inadequate because you cannot afford these lessons. Encourage him to get creative and learn as much as he can with the tools available. Because of the challenges that COVID-19 has created for the school system, I don’t know how helpful his school will be right now in music support, but you should ask if they are offering any music programs that he might be able to join.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Recently I have gotten many solicitations from people offering to give me huge amounts of money if I respond to them. It really is annoying after a while. I’ve been told that they are scammers, but I don’t know how they got to me nor how to get rid of them. Plus, I get random calls from people trying to sell me everything known under the sun, including cheap vacation packages.

It got weird, though, when somebody called saying they were from the Social Security Administration, and I need to give them my Social Security number right away to make sure it was safe. I hung up, but I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do. That person sounded scary. It’s all pretty overwhelming. Can you help? -- Stop Scamming

DEAR STOP SCAMMING: There should be a feature in your email that allows you to identify scammers, report and block them. You also may be able to make your email and other social media platforms private so that you reduce the expanse of people and businesses that can reach you. To reduce scam callers, register your phone with the national Do Not Call list: 888-382-1222. To report potential scams, go to www.usa.gov/stop-scams-frauds to find the right reporting outlet for your problem.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am having some work done on my house. I can’t stay there, so I am staying with a friend to save some money toward my home repairs. I appreciate my friend taking me in for a few weeks and not charging me rent for a room. I am trying to remain humble and thankful, but my friend’s home living conditions are outrageous. She constantly blasts music throughout the day and night. She has a ton of old food in her fridge and leaves it out on the counter. She doesn’t take out her garbage regularly in the bathrooms or kitchen, and the dishes are dirty and piled up. I have been cleaning up often to help her out and after myself, of course, but after a few days of her not cleaning up, it's a mess all over again. I do not know how she gets by when I am not there to clean up for her.

I do not feel it's my place to say anything. I want to pack my things and run to a hotel, but I just can't afford it. How can I make this arrangement more viable for myself? -- Stay-at-Home Maid

DEAR STAY-AT-HOME MAID: Maybe you can take this approach: Ask your friend if you can have a chat. Thank her again for allowing you to live with her. Then tell her that you have noticed that she needs some help to keep her home in order. Point out that you have been cleaning and are happy to continue while you are there, but that there are a few things she could do that would help. Suggest that she devote an hour a day working with you in her home.

I say this because she clearly doesn’t have the discipline. If you make it fun and focused, you may be able to teach her a few things that will help to get her on track. Maybe you can work and talk. She needs to get engaged for it to be possible for her to develop new patterns. Gently encourage her to work with you a little bit each day.

No matter what, as long as you live there, you will need to pull more than your weight. You have to be OK with that. It beats rent that you cannot afford.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend and I have been friends for more than 10 years. We have a great relationship, we are always there for each other, we respect each other's decisions and we can have fun with each other no matter what.

When I look at other girlfriend relationships, sometimes I see them fight and talk about each other and then make up and go right back like nothing has ever happened. I know people who said situations like that have made their friendship stronger and have brought them closer. My best friend and I have never gotten into a fight or had any strong disagreements that put us on bad terms.

Is it healthy to have a relationship with no conflict, or is it expected to have at least one big fight? Is our friendship as strong as I think it is? -- Power Buddies

DEAR POWER BUDDIES: Consider your relationship a blessing, and stop questioning it. You are two of the lucky ones!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)