DEAR HARRIETTE: Gyms have just reopened, and I have returned to my regular schedule of working out every morning and late evening. I am typically the first one in and the last one out most days. Often when I am there, I notice an older gentleman at the gym who uses the machines and never cleans them. Even before COVID, gym etiquette said you clean a machine before and after each use. I’ve told management about this individual not cleaning the machines, but I’m not sure they have really done anything about it. They don’t even instruct staff to clean the machines, either.

I am ready to switch gyms after learning that they aren’t taking care of cleanliness. This is an important time to follow protocols. If this gym isn’t going to hold its staff and members accountable, how can they safely remain open? Is there some bigger action I can take to get them to take this seriously? -- Active Member

DEAR ACTIVE MEMBER: Before leaving the gym, be more assertive with your complaints. Write a formal letter to management about cleanliness. Point out the violator again, as well as the fact that the staff is not actively cleaning machines regularly. Demand that they speak to this man and generally to the membership about vigilance in cleanliness. Put them on notice that you will report them to authorities if they don’t tighten up their act.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband is no longer attracted to me. We are not intimate anymore. I’ve tried so many different things to get my husband to notice me. I have changed up my hair and wardrobe. I have even started taking gym classes to slim down. He never compliments me or any of my new changes. When he comes home from work, he turns down intimacy because he is tired. I even tried surprising him with a vacation to get him away from work so we can focus on each other and reconnect. He made me cancel the trip, making excuses about not being able to leave work now and not wanting to leave our kids and dog with our parents. I am at the end of the road here and don’t know how to get my husband to love me again. I feel so lonely. -- Single Wife

DEAR SINGLE WIFE: When is the last time your husband had a physical? It may be that he is suffering silently with some kind of health concern. Many men experience erectile dysfunction as they age. Could he be grappling with that and embarrassed to let you know? Or perhaps he has some other health condition that has diminished his libido. Have you ruled out the possibility that he has another lover? Finally, some people do lose their libidos over time.

Start with a doctor’s visit -- if you can get him to go -- to do a thorough health check. Then, if you can convince him, visit a therapist together to talk about your marriage and your ideas about intimacy. If he won’t see a therapist, try having a direct conversation with him about it. Tell him you miss being with him and want to find your way back to intimacy.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a business partner whom I want to buy out of our business. We integrated our two businesses because they went together hand in hand, and we were both able to offer the other a benefit. My business has been thriving since the partnership, but her business and programs have been plummeting. Enrollment is down, and I believe her increase in prices could be the cause of this. We have had meetings to plan ways to fix the drop in business, but she shoots down all of our ideas and suggestions.

This partnership isn’t working anymore. There is a lot of potential, but she is driving it into the ground. I know that the programs can improve, but my partner is the biggest obstacle. She is behind on rent, and money isn’t coming in. I am in a position where I can take on full ownership and buy her shares from her. She built the company 20 years ago, and I don’t want to hurt her feelings when I tell her this is her best and only option. How do I dump my partner? -- Reviving the Business

DEAR REVIVING THE BUSINESS: This is delicate territory. Do handle it with care. Sit down with your partner. Show her your books and point out the financial realities you're facing. Thank her for the time you have been partners and point out that the time has come for the relationship to change. Offer to buy her shares in a plan to liquidate the company. Give her space to think about it, express her emotions, etc. Ultimately, come up with a deadline to sever ties. Hire a lawyer to provide legal assistance.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. I made mistakes and came clean, but now she has left me. She’s been staying with her best friend, who happens to be the sister of my good friend at work. So now my girlfriend is under the same roof as my male co-worker.

Over the past few weeks, she has come to our workplace to drop off lunch for him. Seeing her with him gets me upset. He’s been bragging about how much she does for him and his sister and how happy he is to have her staying there. I’m sure they are both doing it to make me jealous, and I can’t take it anymore. At this point, I feel he is disrespecting me on purpose, but I don’t want to have a bad reaction at work. How do I tell my co-worker to knock it off with the comments and jokes about my girlfriend staying with him and his sister? -- Jealous Boyfriend

DEAR JEALOUS BOYFRIEND: The best way to handle this is to ignore this guy. If he sees that he is getting under your skin, he will likely continue and may even ramp up his shenanigans.

If you cannot keep your emotions in check, pull him aside. Remind him that he has been your good friend for a long time and that the way he is acting right now is not helpful as you are dealing with the end of a close relationship with your girlfriend. Ask him to keep his comments to himself.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: How can I balance being independent and self-sufficient and still accept help when I need it? I am used to doing things on my own, by myself, and not really ever asking for help. I am the type of person who most often likes to figure things out at my own pace.

I just sold my house, and I asked my sister to help me pack up and move furniture out of the house. She agreed and was happy to assist. I wasn’t in a rush, but I wanted to get everything done over one weekend because I need to go to work during the week. The whole time we were packing, she was doing everything wrong! I told her how to pack the delicate items and store everything, but she just thought her ideas were better. I explained how I wanted the furniture moved and stored in the garage, but again, she offered up so many other ways. I told her that I have envisioned this move for a while now, and I want to execute this project the way I had it planned, so please follow the plan. It became a huge argument. She made me feel like what I was doing was wrong. I understood her suggestions, but I had a plan I wanted to keep. At that point, I told her if she wasn’t going to help me with what I needed, she could go home and I would do it by myself.

Is it me? Am I unreceptive to help? I hate the idea that I might be controlling, but I just feel like I have a certain order that cannot be improvised or else I lose concentration and become a foggy brain. -- Controlling

DEAR CONTROLLING: Sounds like you want to be in control of your life. The problem is that your sister may not be the best person to help you execute your tightly organized plans. When you have a volunteer family member, it may be best to give a bit and to welcome other ideas -- at least some of them. In the future, you may want to hire helpers who are paid to follow your plans. Start by laying out the plan and checking to make sure all involved are willing to comply.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My car has been through everything with me, but I find myself at a crossroads. Should I continue to fix and put money into a 12-year-old car or give up on my car for a while and use the time to save for a new one? The obstacle is that I cannot be without a car. I need it to get to and from work. There is no bus route to my workplace, and taking an Uber or Lyft gets expensive and will take away from my car fund.

Recently, fixing my car consisted of two different jobs that have cost between $500 and $800, and now a third job that needs to be done will cost within that same range. I could buy a car for about the same cost as these repairs, but I run the risk of needing more repairs. I can’t begin to figure out the best decision. What do you suggest? -- Car Makeover

DEAR CAR MAKEOVER: If you can figure out a way to get to work for a while without your car, go for it. Older vehicles can reach a point of being a financial drain. Can you carpool? Get creative in getting to work so that you can replace your car as soon as possible.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)