DEAR READERS: Many of you responded about the mature woman who felt like giving up because she was overweight. This particular letter has details that may inspire those of you who need a little push.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'd like to add to your response to Overweight. She didn't state her age, but lamented it could be too late in life to lose weight. I'd like to challenge that idea. I gained 70 pounds with my pregnancy at 33 and lost only 10 to 15 pounds giving birth and nursing. I'm 5 feet, 2 inches tall and got up to 186 pounds, which I carried for years, well into my 50s. About 15 years ago, I had a bad ankle break that required surgery. In the hospital they tested my A1C and said I was at risk for Type 2 diabetes, which terrified me. I was at least 55 at this point.

While still bedridden, I massively altered my eating, adding more complex carbs (such as a small amount of rice and beans twice a day) and eating four smaller meals per day. I was still getting no exercise, as I couldn't put any weight on that ankle. This was enough to improve my A1C, but at 160 pounds, I was still obese. I kept that weight off for five years or so, but I didn't lose any more. I was overjoyed that I didn't gain it back. If I added a few pounds for a month or more, I would cut the sweets out of my diet until it was gone. I was vigilant.

At this point, I rejoined a gym and got regular exercise back into my life, and after another year or so, I was ready to attack my weight again. Over the next year to 18 months, I lost the rest of the weight, another 30-plus pounds, and I now maintain a weight of 130 to 135 pounds -- in my 60s.

Of course, this story doesn't expose how difficult this was and how important it was to make incremental but sustainable changes. Lots of people find it discouraging to take such a long, slow journey to permanent weight loss. I hadn't expected to be able to lose over 50 pounds, ever, much less to keep it off, but I did.

I can't really say why I was able to succeed when so many others fail. Maybe because I grew up eating home-cooked whole foods and kept that up my entire adult life. I never drink soda, never went on a fad diet, and consume very little alcohol, but I do love ice cream and homemade cakes and pies! If it's in the house, even now, I eat it up quickly. Thankfully, I can control myself in the grocery store, and I give myself monthly treats.

Too, I have generally been more active than most and, over the years, would go to a gym for a year or two and then slack off for a few years. But I've always loved feeling strong and was always a walker. This may have made it easier for me to commit to regular exercise.

But I did lose all this weight after 55, most of it after age 60, after carrying the weight for over 15 years. You can do it. Take it slow. Total denial isn't sustainable. Keep moving your body. Age doesn't have to be the determinant. -- Victorious

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: During the quarantine and shutdown, I closed my small nail salon for 10 weeks. I had all the ups and downs, fears and frustrations people talk about. One huge one was based on the fact that we were told to close for two weeks to flatten the curve, but they only picked certain industries.

So while we small businesses complied 100% in the fervent hope of reopening as soon as possible, the big box stores packed in the customers. The garden centers, grocery chains and hardware stores were completely crowded with no regulations, leading to the 10-week shutdown for the rest of us.

Unfortunately, my frustration bubbled over onto a friend when I called to see how she was faring. We have been friends on and off for years. She lives a few towns away and has a similar small personal services business. She reported that she'd found a loophole and gotten her business deemed essential so she could stay open. She has a face-to-face business where she touches people's bare skin.

As carefully as I could, but through clenched teeth, I asked her how she could justify elevating her services above mammograms and dental exams and such, which were all suspended. I was incensed because I felt she put us all at risk of staying home longer when we all needed to work. I could hear that I highly offended her, and the rest of the call was strained. We haven't spoken since.

I am now sorry, even though I firmly believe what she did was the height of bad ethics. I'm afraid to initiate an apology that could devolve into explanations and make things worse. But I do want to try to apologize. -- Sorry in the South

DEAR SORRY IN THE SOUTH: Call her. Check to see if she is well. Tell her you are sorry that you blew up when you talked a while back. Don’t revisit the reason for your argument. You can maintain your belief about her choice and rekindle your relationship if you both want to do so.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have two questions regarding texting etiquette. First, I have relatives who have made the decision not to respond back to texts. One of them told me they are not generally responding to anyone because it is time-consuming. I find it irresponsible and rude. What should I do?

Next question: I have a dear friend who will send a text that consists of 10 questions. "How is Sissy doing? Did you go to church last week? Is your daughter in town? Did you see your son on Friday?" and on and on, all in one text! Can you please give some guidance on how to conduct such a text conversation? -- Navigating the Texting World

DEAR NAVIGATING THE TEXTING WORLD: Texting has become a primary method of communication for many people, yet it can be overwhelming for a variety of reasons. I think that the best way for you to come to a peaceful relationship with texting is to know your own comfort level and those of the people with whom you communicate.

In the first instance, if you have relatives who refuse to text back, stop texting them. It clearly doesn’t work for them. Instead, pick up the phone and call them when you have a need or desire to be in touch. In the other situation, if the barrage of questions is too much, answer what you can and leave the rest for another engagement. You could also tell your friend (not in writing) that it’s hard for you to answer so many questions at a time. Perhaps you should pick up the phone to call that friend when the list of questions is too long to write back.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend will be visiting from California for a family funeral and asked if I and another friend wanted to get together overnight at a friend's cabin. I agreed, as I have been watching social media and have noticed how they are responding to mask-wearing. I thought maybe the plane ride home would be a high-risk situation for my friends; however, airlines are ensuring people wear masks.

My California friend asked if we could invite another friend. After the friend who owns the cabin said yes, my California friend went ahead and invited our other friend without my input. I love this other friend, but, observing her social media, I don't see her practicing safe social distancing. In addition, she has two kids physically going to high school and sports. I have decided not to attend the overnight gathering with the other three friends due to this. Should I be honest about why I am not going to attend? We have a family member who is gravely ill, so I can cite that as my reason. But I’m upset about how this was handled and not sure what to do next. Thanks for any help. -- Too Many Friends, Not Enough Space

DEAR TOO MANY FRIENDS, NOT ENOUGH SPACE: If your friends ask you why you didn’t join them, tell them. Many people who contract COVID-19 these days do so when they let their guard down around people they are close to -- friends, family and loved ones.

You made a smart decision based on the facts at hand -- including having the ill family member. Remind your friends to stay vigilant and to wear masks even when they are inside the cabin. You don’t have to chastise them for how the invitations went out. But you can encourage them to be as safe as possible.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I loved your answer to Young Voter who is having a difficult time dealing with her emotions amid the discord and chaos of this election environment. She would not be alone even among caring voters 50 or more years older, myself included. Your advising her to become as knowledgeable as possible about each candidate and his or her aims and implications for our country was spot on. It may be difficult to accomplish but not impossible if she listens to both sides and to what other respected people have to say about them. In my 58 years of voting eligibility, I have exercised my right in every national and local election, casting votes only for candidates I have researched as thoroughly as possible. The key going forward as an involved citizen is to remain vigilant to the process.

I’d like to add to your suggestion that YV urge other young people to be sure to vote. Too many times voters do only that; they go to the polls and cast a vote with only the most superficial information. They think that the act itself fulfills their civic duty and that it doesn’t matter for whom they vote. Since they have usually had no substantial instruction throughout their public school years about the history, purpose and workings of our (or any) government, their votes are nothing more than shots in the dark, while counting just as much as an informed vote. I believe YV’s friends should also be encouraged to educate themselves to become mindful, serious citizen voters. That is the only way we can all take honest responsibility for our own sacred, privileged participation in government of and by the people. WE are The People! -- Proud Independent Voter

DEAR PROUD INDEPENDENT VOTER: Amen! This is what I say all the time. Thanks for the reminder.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)