DEAR HARRIETTE: I am pregnant with my first child. My husband is African American, and I am white. We have been having conversations about raising a biracial child. My husband knows the sorts of conversations he plans to have with our child about race, but I want to be a part of the conversation as well. As a white woman, what are important conversations I should have with my biracial child? What challenges will we face, and how can we prepare and support each other as a family? -- Biracial Family
BIRACIAL FAMILY: This is where it is essential for you and your husband to talk. It cannot be just him having conversations with your child. You two chose each other. Now you need to choose together to decide what is important for your children to know -- and why. You probably need some educating yourself. Talk to your husband about his experiences growing up, his concerns for the safety and well-being of the children you bring into the world, and what he plans to talk to them about. Tell him what your thoughts and concerns are as well.
Talk it out today and in an ongoing manner. Though we are in 2020, racial tension and conflict remain at a high point in our country. We all need to be talking about our history, our personal experiences and the fate of our children.
As a white woman, think about what privileges you have enjoyed and what challenges you have faced. Then remember any racially charged experiences you have had since you have been with your husband. Acknowledge them. Talk about them with him. Make a plan for the future -- together.