DEAR HARRIETTE: I belong to a social club. Since sheltering at home began and restaurants and stuff have been closed, they, too, have shut down. Management invited members to contribute to a fund for the staff. I thought that was nice; they’ve had no income, and most of them want to be artists, so they had nowhere to turn during this time. I chose to give what I could to them rather than to a random charity. When I told my sister about it, she said that if I can’t get a tax write-off, I am wasting my money. I think that’s the wrong attitude. I know these people, and they have been very kind to me over the years. Giving a few dollars to help them out seems like a small but helpful gesture. What do you think? -- Generosity

DEAR GENEROSITY: Good for you that you have chosen to be supportive of people you know who are struggling at this time. It is true that many people who work in restaurants, bars and social clubs double as artists. For many, having the stability of a job that has flexible hours and that comes with tips can make the difference in being able to pay basic bills like rent, food, telephone and utilities. I think you were smart to follow your heart and give what could to help these people.

Your sister isn’t wrong either. It’s great if you can get a tax write-off for your generosity. But what’s even better is for you to give from your heart to those in need.

DEAR HARRIETTE: This is in response to the letter from the mother who was upset, because her son was calling her by her first name. More than 34 years ago, my 7-year-old daughter started doing the same thing, and it irritated me, plus I pictured her 3-year-old brother picking up the same bad habit. After thinking about it a bit, I told my daughter that, yes, my name is Helen, and lots of people called me that, but there were only two people in the whole world that were able to call me Mommy. I could see the wheels moving in her head as she digested the fact that using the name Mommy made her special and privileged, and it was never an issue again. I was so happy this worked, I told myself I'd share my story when someone else was having the same problem. Good luck! -- Mommy Helen

DEAR MOMMY HELEN: What a wonderful story! It is a privilege and a blessing to be able to be a mommy and to have someone call you Mommy. The bond that exists between a mother and child can be so strong and powerful -- and unique. Your approach presented a brilliant way for your daughter to grasp how precious the name that helps to define your relationship is. I hope other families will use this strategy when needed. Thanks so much.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I heard a doctor likening the coronavirus to the AIDS crisis the other day. At first I thought they were crazy; obviously they are very different things. But I listened some more, and what this doctor was saying is that there was a terrible stigma attached to people with AIDS, so much so that people were reluctant to say that they had the disease. Now that same thing seems true for people who have COVID-19. My neighbor, for example, has been deathly ill. I’m pretty sure he has it. But neither he nor his family will talk about it. I think if he does have it, everybody should be more cautious around him. Not to make him a pariah but to protect the rest of us from possibly catching it. Am I wrong to feel that way? How can I be a good neighbor and protect my family from possibly getting infected? -- Avoiding Hysteria

DEAR AVOIDING HYSTERIA: Dr. Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, has talked about how the AIDS crisis and COVID-19 bear some similarities. Both the reach of the diseases and the stigma attached to them can be compared.

You are right to be concerned about your family’s health in relation to your sick neighbor. Follow the precautions as outlined by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, especially keeping your distance and keeping your home, door knobs and all surfaces clean. What you shouldn’t do is shun him. Call and ask if he needs anything. If he is isolated at home and ill, check to see if you can bring him food or other supplies that you leave at his door. Be attentive from a distance.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family rents a house in a beach community every summer. When the pandemic hit, I did not cancel our reservation because I was hoping that things would be opened up by then. Now that summer is almost here, it’s still uncertain whether we can actually get in the water at the beach, but I feel like I should still take my family away. I see reports of people hanging out on the beach in large numbers, but we aren’t going to a place like that. I have young kids, so I can control their activities. I think they need to get outside and have some fun. We live in an apartment in the city. What do you think? -- Going to the Beach

DEAR GOING TO THE BEACH: Check to see what the guidelines are for the community you will be visiting. Some beaches are establishing markers to make it easier for people to practice social distancing while they are outside. I agree that it could be good for your family’s mental health to go to a place where you can enjoy the open air. Just stay vigilant. Don’t let your children out of your sight. Enforce wearing masks whenever they are around other people -- even at the beach. This may be difficult, but if they break the rules, take them inside. That may be punishment enough to get them to keep the masks on the next time you allow them to go outside.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I hate the back-and-forth in the media between the liberal press and the conservative press. I decided to watch both to try to figure out my view on things, but now I am even more confused. Both sides make really strong arguments, even about going outside now that the government is slowly letting up on restrictions.

I can’t decide if I am afraid or ready to throw caution to the wind. I am an asthmatic, but it is controlled. My friends are saying I don’t need to wear a mask since the president doesn’t wear one. They say the people who are wearing masks everywhere are just overdoing it. I’m not sure what to do. I don’t want to be scared all the time. I am a woman of faith. I’m wondering if I am not calling on my faith enough since I am worried about how to go back out into the world. What should I do? -- Unclear

DEAR UNCLEAR: Politics aside, you should listen to the advice from your own doctor and from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Starting with your doctor, schedule a telehealth call where you talk about the state of your health and all of your concerns. Ask about what your doctor recommends to protect you as you go out into the public.

The CDC currently recommends covering your face whenever you go outside and even when you are inside if you suspect that someone in your home may be ill. Doing that is not being overly cautious. It is being smart. The guidelines suggest that you should also continue to stay at least 6 feet away from others, even close friends. Allow your faith to lead you to the scientific facts that can help to save your life. Don’t get swayed by the news of either political party. For more information visit: cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/prevent-getting-sick/prevention.html

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just got a contract for a project that should last until the end of the year. I am so excited and relieved. I have worked primarily as what is now called a “gig worker.” With the shutdown, my work basically disappeared. While this job doesn’t pay much, it’s way better than scrambling for unemployment, and I get a paycheck every two weeks. When I talked to my husband about it, all he could do is say how I should be making more money for what I am doing for these people. We are struggling, and this job is putting food on our table. Why can’t he be happy for me and for our family? What can I say to him to get him to see the big picture? I should add that he is lucky. He has the same job that he’s had for 20 years, and so far nobody is getting laid off. We are lucky for that, too. -- Need More Support

DEAR NEED MORE SUPPORT: Remind your husband how fortunate you are to have his consistent job -- and how grateful you are for the project you just got. Acknowledge that more money might be nice, but what you are bringing home is consistent and helpful to your family’s bottom line. Tell him you need him to have your back and to stop complaining. Point out all of the blessings in your life, and name this job as one of them.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)