DEAR HARRIETTE: I have an annual subscription to my local theater company. This used to be a favorite activity for my husband and me, but everything is canceled now. The company recently sent me a letter asking if I would donate the money I spent for the subscription so that it can try to stay in business. It also asked if I would be willing to make a contribution, kind of a good-faith gesture to try to help the company stay afloat. I totally understand the situation. Most of the performers are young up-and-comers who probably have nothing now. When they weren’t on stage, I bet most of them worked in restaurants and bars that are now closed. I am happy to let them keep my subscription money, but I can’t afford to give more. Things are tight at home for me, too. How can I tell them without being rude? -- Limited Gift

DEAR LIMITED GIFT: Be direct with the theater company. Know that it will be appreciative that you are willing to donate your subscription money without the promise of entertainment in return. That, in and of itself, is generous and thoughtful. The fact that you are unable to give more is perfectly understandable.

All of us are in this together, trying to navigate how to live in the pandemic. There is no one solution. It’s tough, and we are doing our best. Give yourself credit for being thoughtful and as generous as you can. Write a note to the theater company expressing your gratitude for its creativity over time. Describe what you can offer financially, and express that this is the limit for now. Wish the company well as it weathers this storm. That’s sufficient.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I learned that one of my mother’s best friends is not doing well. It sounds like she is physically ill and also suffering from dementia. My mother is not well, either. The two of them used to be so close. Now I don’t even know if it is a good idea to put them on the phone with each other because they are both feeble. It’s really sad. I end up talking to each of them separately. How much should I tell my mother about her friend? I am so unsure. Obviously, they can’t visit each other. Half the time, I don’t know what my mother retains anyway. Should I make sure that she knows about her friend’s condition? -- Keeping Informed

DEAR KEEPING INFORMED: We never want to worry our elders, so it is good to be cautious. But at the same time, you should let your mother know that her friend is suffering. Without giving her the blow-by-blow, tell her a bit about her friend’s condition. If your mother is a praying woman, suggest that she offer a prayer for her friend. If possible, facilitate a call between the two of them with you on the phone. In this way, you can guide the conversation and also remember what was shared so that you can continue dialogue about it with your mother at another time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m having a hard time getting my teenage son to get up and take a shower. I don’t mean every day; I’m talking once a week. When I pester him, he blows me off, saying he’s saving water, or asking why it matters anyway; it’s not like he’s going anywhere. Really? Basic hygiene is still important. And the doctors say being clean is part of what keeps us safe. How can I get him to snap back into being responsible for himself? -- Hygiene

DEAR HYGIENE: Your son is being a teenager -- times 10. For what it’s worth, he is not alone. Many teenagers (and others) have slacked off on the basics after this extended period at home. Some people are hardly getting out of bed. It’s not good, but it’s true. To motivate your teenager, you have to get him where it counts. Take away his phone and all other electronics until he bathes. Tell him how many times a week you are requiring him to clean up. Then take his electronics and give them back only when he has complied. Trust that he will get clean fast if he suddenly cannot communicate with his friends.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I worked so hard over the past two years to clean up my credit and boost my credit score. When this year started, I had the best score of my life. Now I’m watching all of my hard work go to hell. I lost my job, and I don’t have the resources to pay my basic bills anymore. I found a part-time gig at my church that is good because at least I can buy food and pay rent for now. But my other bills? I don’t have the money. What can I do to save my credit score? -- Crash and Burn

DEAR CRASH AND BURN: I just listened to advice on this topic from Michelle Singletary, a financial reporter for The Washington Post. She suggested that you have to put everything into perspective. While it’s wonderful to have an excellent credit score, that simply cannot be the priority right now. Surviving must be at the top of the list. She cautioned people to pay the essentials first: rent or mortgage, electricity and food. I would add communication -- telephones are essential, too. After that, start negotiating with your creditors. Call anyone you owe money to, and talk to them about revised payment plans and potentially reduced bills. These days, creditors are often willing to work with anyone who is attempting to settle a debt.

As far as your credit score goes, it is most important for you to have a high score when you are applying for a loan. Unless you are currently looking for a loan, you can survive a dip in your score. Don’t belabor the credit report now. When the time comes for you to need it, you can explain what happened during the period that your score dropped. Like most everybody else in the world, you were living through the pandemic. We will all need a pass for surviving this one.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Working from home every day and staring into a computer screen is making me nuts. I feel like I sit all day long. And I have the extra weight to prove it. It’s horrible. I don’t even want to get on the scale to see the damage I’ve done to my body. I’m mortified by the thought. I’m grateful to be working, but this isn’t sustainable. I am on teleconferences all day long, and I am forced to sit at my desk, not moving for hours. My smartwatch screams at me to stand up, but I keep sitting because that’s where the meetings happen -- on my computer. What can I do to take better care of myself? The end of this way of working is nowhere in sight. I don’t know if I am going to survive it. -- SOS

DEAR SOS: Can you elevate your computer so that you can stand during some of your calls? That is one way to get you out of that chair. In between meetings, stand up, stretch and walk around. Just like the guidelines to avoid getting carpel tunnel syndrome, every 20 minutes you should stand and stretch your body, including your arms and legs. Listen to your watch and stand.

Beyond that, figure out a time of day when you can exercise. If you can start your day an hour earlier, get up and either do a series of exercises in your house or take a walk. Move your body to get the blood circulating. In the evening, be sure to stretch again. Since you aren’t as physically active as you used to be, eat less. Dramatically reduce your carbohydrate intake, too. Wear clothes that don’t stretch. This will help you to keep track of your physical expansion.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have hired two young people to work with me on a project. It’s good because everybody can work from home. Their work is mostly research, but it does involve talking to a number of people they don’t know. I’ve been training them on the questioning process so that they can gather the data properly. So far, that is going pretty well. What is harder is getting them to realize that they have to look professional even though they are working from home. All of our calls are videoconferences. These kids are showing up looking like they just rolled out of bed with disheveled hair and the same sweatshirts every day. I know we are working from home, but it is still work. I need to drive home the point that this is a professional job, and there are expectations. How can I get them to comply? -- Dress for Work

DEAR DRESS FOR WORK: You have to be direct with them. Call them on their attire, and tell them what you expect them to wear when they are talking to you and when they are contacting others. Point out that even though you are working remotely, this is a professional engagement with specific expectations. Write them down so that your team is clear about what they are. The more direct you are with them, the easier it will be for them to follow your rules.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)