DEAR HARRIETTE: I go outside once a week to buy food and go to the pharmacy (when necessary). I don’t spend much time outside, and I’m happy to report that there aren’t a lot of people outside. What I am noticing, though, is an increase in the number of people who are begging. Many of the people look no different from me or my friends. The other ones are out there, too -- more seasoned beggars who ask for change or a dollar. I am conflicted about what I should give to these people. I know that life is getting tougher for many people, but it’s true for me, too. How can I share with some of these people and stay true to my belief that they should figure out how to take care of themselves? -- When to Give

DEAR WHEN TO GIVE: I want to advise you to soften your eyes and your attitude. Whether or not you give people money, it is important for you to gain a better understanding of what you are seeing. Through no fault of their own, millions of people are out of work. Statistics show that most Americans have only a few weeks’ worth of savings, which means that many of the more than 12 million people who recently lost their jobs are penniless already. They need food and medicines, just like you. I can only imagine that it is horrifying for many of them to find themselves outside asking for the kindness of strangers at a time when it’s scary to be outside at all.

Please look upon them with compassion. That includes the ones who have been hustling for a longer period of time. They deserve our positive energy and sense of humanity.

Who you share your resources with and how much is up to you. Consider walking with a bit of food you can give away or loose change that you can offer when you feel inspired. But also, a kind smile and acknowledgment that you are encountering another human being counts for a lot -- even if you can’t give anything more.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I talked to a good friend who told me that almost a dozen people in his life have died in the past couple of weeks due to COVID-19. He had been trying to stay positive and follow directions, but he was really down when we talked that day. I offered to pray with him, which we did. I then told him that as bad as it is, he has to be grateful that he is alive. He got mad at me for saying that. I didn’t know what to say, honestly. Nothing like this has ever happened before. But I do know that if you get depressed, it will be harder to get through this sadness. What else can I say to him? -- Grieving Friend

DEAR GRIEVING FRIEND: Forgive your friend for not being able to receive your message at this dark moment in his life. Continue to pray for him. And reach out to him soon and often. Check in to learn how he is feeling and what he is doing. Share something positive that you have read or seen. Encourage him to do something uplifting. Stay in touch and be a good listener, even when he is insensitive.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Working from home for all these weeks makes me realize how reliant I had become on service providers like hairdressers and nail technicians. I know that sounds unimportant, given the circumstances, but in my work, I am on Zoom calls every day, all day long. My co-workers can see me, and I am looking a little rough around the edges. I don’t really know how to do my hair. And my nails are busted. I tried to redo them, but I have acrylics, and they kind of crumbled. I am what my kids would call a “hot mess.” How can I get it together when I really don’t have the grooming skills that I need? -- Unkempt

DEAR UNKEMPT: You stand with thousands of other women and men who have come to rely on outside services to keep their appearances in check. For many men, that weekly barbershop appointment has been on hold for months. Same for people who have standing hair or nail appointments. Clearly, you have to pivot to self-care.

Let the internet be your guide. Use these simple instructional words to search for nail removal tips: removing acrylic nails at home safely. The most important word there is “safely.” Be patient. If you rush with the nail removal, you can damage your weakened nails. The directions typically say to soak your nails in acetone polish remover for 20 to 30 minutes. Add another 30 if the coating is hard to remove.

For your hair, it all depends on the texture, length and style of your hair. If you can pull it back in a bun or ponytail, you have an easy solution. If you need chemicals to soften your hair or color to dye it, you may want to order those products if you think you can carefully follow the directions. Look online for instructions for doing hair with your texture. You may also want to call your hairstylist. Some salons are offering tutorials for their customers.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family has planned a vacation for this summer, and we have all been looking forward to it. We rented a house in the Dominican Republic, and about a dozen of us are planning to travel to be together. Now I’m not so sure we are going to be able to go. Who knows when the travel ban will be lifted? But even if it is OK to travel by June, I’m not sure if we will feel safe enough to board planes and travel internationally right after being quarantined at home for so long. What do you think we should do? -- Family Vacation

DEAR FAMILY VACATION: Many people are canceling or postponing big trips because of the uncertainty of the future. As lovely as your trip sounds, it seems unlikely that you will be able to take a big group on this journey in June. Rather than waiting until the last minute, when the airlines are already in crisis mode, you may want to get your money back for now and schedule a trip for next year, when things have settled down more.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son is 6 years old, and he recently started calling me by my first name. I am old-fashioned: I want him to call me Mommy. It’s like one day he woke up and realized my name isn’t actually “Mommy,” and he went around the house chanting it. The more I protest, the more he says my name. What should I do? I want to teach him to have good manners. When I was growing up, I would have gotten a spanking for calling my mother by her first name. I am not sure how to handle this. -- A Name

DEAR A NAME: Rather than fighting with your 6-year-old, give him a bit to claim your name. He is learning. It may be a source of fascination to him that his mother has a name other than Mommy. If you stop reacting so much and trying to control him, he will likely calm down all by himself.

When his fascination subsides, you may want to let him know when it is smart to use your proper name. I learned this the hard way when my daughter was about your son’s age. She had somehow gotten outside when I was in the doctor’s office. The door self-locked, and she was calling out, “Mommy! Mommy!” Since I was certain that my child was playing in the waiting room, I didn’t really hear her cries. The building manager rescued her, so all ended up well. What I realized is that in case of emergency, it is much better for a child to call out the mother’s name rather than Mommy because every mother’s name is Mommy. At that moment, my young daughter learned when to use what name. I hope you never have such a scare, but it is wise to tell your children that in time of need, call out your real name.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend, “Jeff,” was recently diagnosed with diabetes. He is single and apparently has not been taking good care of himself. Some other friends and I agreed that we are going to help him get healthy by taking turns making food for him. We all live nearby. I wish we could also teach him how to cook, but now that we have social distancing, it seems like an impossible task. What do you recommend? -- Healthy Tips

DEAR HEALTHY TIPS: It’s wonderful that you and your friends are prepared to help Jeff get healthy. It will mean a lot to him, at least during these early days of learning to eat differently, if others are providing him with food. But you are right: In order to maintain a healthy lifestyle, he needs to learn to do it for himself.

Consider teaching him to cook with Zoom classes. You can be in your kitchen, and he can be in his. You can read the ingredients with him and go step-by-step through the recipes. You can make dishes together, virtually, while maintaining a healthy distance. The bonus is that it should be fun!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)