DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a puppy. I’m happy about it, but at the same time, I feel bad. I am in school, and I work almost every day. My puppy ends up staying in a kennel for 10 to 12 hours a day while I’m away. When I get home, he is so happy to see me. I spend some time with him, but I’m so tired I don’t really have the energy to play. Plus, I often go out at night. I’m 20 years old, and I have an active social life. I feel like I got my puppy before I was ready to accept responsibility for it.

My mom puppy-sits sometimes, and she offered to adopt my puppy the other day. She can see how he needs more attention than I have to give. I feel bad about this, but maybe it is best for the puppy to be in an environment that is more attentive. How can I feel better about making this tough decision? -- Adopt a Dog

DEAR ADOPT A DOG: Here’s a time when you should be filled with gratitude that you have a mother who is willing and able to take your puppy. As you are seeing, taking care of a puppy is a huge responsibility. Dogs are social creatures and do not enjoy being left alone all day and night. It’s not good for their psyches or their bodies. Just like people, they need to relieve themselves during the day.

Thank your mother for rescuing you and your puppy. Offer to help her in whatever ways you can. That may include helping to pay for dog food, coming by to visit the puppy and generally staying in contact with the dog.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was invited to a couple of black-tie events this season. When I dug out my dresses, I realized that most of my eveningwear is way too small. I don’t want to hold on to these dresses in hopes that they will fit next year because I seriously doubt that I will lose enough weight for that to happen. I also don’t want to toss them. I know a woman who may fit them perfectly. She is in one of my social clubs. Do you think it would be rude of me to offer for her to look at them and pay me a small fee if she wants to have them? One dress still has tags on it. I would charge only a small amount, but it would help me to be able to replace the ones that don’t fit. -- Sell Off

DEAR SELL OFF: You are smart to want to get rid of the dresses that you aren’t wearing and that do not fit. Making room in your closet for what fits you now is smart. There’s nothing wrong with selling them at a nominal price, either. Just know that this woman may not be interested. Be direct with her. Let her know that you thought of her as you pulled out these dresses and would like her to take a look. If she’s interested, let her know what you will charge as well as what the value of the dresses is.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My family went out to dinner with friends of ours who were in town visiting. There were five of them and three of us, and the restaurant was kind of expensive. When it came time to pay the bill, it was a little awkward. Normally we would just split the bill, but the number of people in each party was so different. When I thought about it, though, I was OK with splitting it because we had drinks and the others drank water. (Alcoholic beverages always hike up the bill.)

Our visitors ended up doing a partial split, where they paid a lot more than us. I guess it worked out, but I don’t know if I handled it as well as I should have. What is the best way to handle a situation like that? -- Splitting the Bill

DEAR SPLITTING THE BILL: Whenever there is a group and people need to split the check, there can be an awkward moment.

The easiest thing to do is to take a quick glance at the check to get a sense of what you owe. If your portion is significantly smaller than the others’, you can offer to pay for your group plus a hearty tip and give the rest to the other people who are paying. You could also simply split it evenly (if you can afford to do so) -- but that is not necessary. People go into situations like that knowing who they want to pay for. If you are upfront about what you plan to do and quickly and proactively make it known what your intentions are for settling the check, chances are, the others will follow suit.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I always give a tip to the staff in my apartment building in the new year. I started this several years ago, when money was so tight that I couldn’t afford to give them money and buy gifts for my friends. Now it is just what I do. I noticed that one of the new guys has been looking at me kind of funny, and I think it’s because he didn’t get his tip from me yet. I plan to give out cards next week, but his attitude makes me want to skip him. It is not a requirement to tip, even though it is expected. Should I leave him out of my new year’s gifts, or just get over it? -- Ready To Gift

DEAR READY TO GIFT: Even though this new staffer has a bad attitude, don’t let it sour your good humor. You know what your plan is. Include him in your building’s tips. If there are certain people who have a more difficult role in your building or who you are closer to, by all means tip them more generously. For this newbie, a basic tip is fine to show that you are thinking of him. He can earn a higher tip if he steps up and has a better attitude in the new year.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have worked with the same accountant for more than 20 years. He is a good man who has always helped me with the finances. In recent years, I have noticed that he is slowing down a lot. He is an older guy. I wonder if I should be looking for someone to fill his shoes. I worry that without this support, I will be in trouble. I don’t want to upset him, though. Should I talk to him about it? I’m not quite sure what to do. -- Time To Move On

DEAR TIME TO MOVE ON: Does your accountant have any support in his office? Check in with him and ask him what he plans to do with his clients when he retires. Hopefully he has a succession plan in mind. It’s OK to ask him about it.

For now, since you know that he is moving more slowly, you should get your taxes to him as early as possible so that he is not backlogged when he is working on yours. If he has recommendations for who will take over in the future, that’s great. If not, you should ask your friends for referrals. Tell them what you like about your accountant, and ask if they know anyone with similar skills and demeanor.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband went into my son’s bedroom to vacuum, and as he was moving things around, he found a box filled with vape pens. This is the second time we have discovered him with these pens in his possession.

The last time we caught him, we confronted him about how dangerous it is to use these things. Several people have died from using them. We know teenagers try things, but this is a health hazard. My husband suggested that we not mention that he found them, because it might just make him hide his contraband more carefully in the future. I get that, but I think we need to address this. I don’t know what I would do if my son got sick -- or worse -- and we didn’t say anything. What do you think? -- No More Vaping

DEAR NO MORE VAPING: Your husband has a point. Perhaps you shouldn’t give away the fact that the pens were discovered. You can still talk to your son about the perils of vaping. Since you know that he did it in the past, revisit the topic with him. Ask him if he still vapes. Remind him of the consequences of doing this. Tell him you know he is a teen and will try things, but this one really is not worth it. Reinforce how you feel about other substances so that he is clear about your perspective.

If you can get your son to talk to you about what he has tried, that would be fantastic. Some teens talk to their parents. It might help if you share a few things that you tried as a teen and what impact they had on you. If you go that route, you have to be honest. Just make sure you have processed whatever lesson you learned so that you can tell a full story that will reinforce positive behavior for your son.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)