DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a friend who is extremely pushy with her requests. She is a woman of privilege, and she is accustomed to getting her way immediately. She asked me to make an introduction, and I don’t think it’s a great idea. She pushed so hard that I reluctantly agreed.

I have been trying to figure out how to approach the situation to create the chance for a good outcome. She called me the next day to find out if I had reached out to the woman yet. I’m afraid that if she is pushy like this with my other friend, it will not end up going well for either of us. How can I preserve both relationships when this one friend just won’t let up? -- In the Middle

DEAR IN THE MIDDLE: If you truly don’t think you should make this connection, don’t do it. Stand up to your friend, and tell her why you don’t think it’s the right fit. In the best-case scenario, you can recommend someone else who might be better suited to your friend. Think long and hard for another person who would be able to welcome your friend’s pushy manner better. If nobody comes to mind, you can just say no to her. Or if you think the project she is representing is a good one but her demeanor is the problem, you could reach out to the person she requested and tell her that you know someone who has a great idea; you aren’t sure if it’s a fit, but you think it could be worth it for her to consider. Establishing a caveat could protect you. But beware, even lukewarm recommendations can seem much stronger to the person receiving them -- especially if you are highly regarded. So you must protect your reputation as you navigate this tricky situation.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am going to a three-day conference where I am a principal conference speaker. I am excited about this opportunity and want to do my best.

I was recently called and invited to speak at another event during the conference, but it conflicts with yet another meeting that I am scheduled to participate in. This is tough because I am interested in joining the leadership of the organization. I don’t think it’s wise to rescind my involvement in one meeting because another seems more high profile. How should I handle this? -- Climbing

DEAR CLIMBING: Thank the people who most recently invited you to be a part of their meeting. Let them know that while you will be at the conference, you have already confirmed your participation in an event at the same time as theirs. Ask if there might be another time during the conference when you can meet their principal constituency.

Meetings can occur over drinks, at meals or during cocktail receptions. You don’t have to close the door to getting to know those other people. Suggest other ideas and make it clear that you would like to be with them, but your previous commitment prohibits meeting at that specific time.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a freelance contractor. Recently, a friend invited me to have lunch with her to talk about a project. I gave her a few of my ideas with the intention of getting her to hire me to work with her. That’s what she said to me, after all.

Now I realize that she has to get her boss to agree to anything that she does. I have met her boss before, and we got along fine, but that was years ago. I don’t know if her boss will want me or not. I am not a celebrity, but I do have a good networking list. Should I reach out to her boss to remind her of me, or just leave it to chance? -- Hiring Politics

DEAR HIRING POLITICS: You should not overstep your bounds with your friend to speak to her boss. That could easily backfire on you. Instead, make sure that your friend has all the information needed to present you as a perfect contractor for this project. If you have additional ideas that can fortify her presentation to her boss, both about you specifically and about the work at hand, follow up with a good-luck note along with a few additional ideas. But the ball is in your friend’s court now.

Hopefully she will be able to sell the idea with you in it satisfactorily to her boss. Do know that there is always a gamble when you release your creative ideas out to the world -- and that’s OK. Sometimes your generosity with your creativity brings you work, but that is not always the case. You still must keep on trying and trust that you have more creative ideas where the others came from. Good luck!

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have had false teeth for about a decade. The other day at work, my bridge broke in my hand. This has happened in the past, but I was always able to glue it back together. I have crazy glue, and it really works. This time, though, the teeth won’t stick together. I know this sounds nuts, but it’s how I can keep my teeth looking right. Now I have to go to the dentist, and I really can’t afford it. What should I do? -- Tooth Repair

DEAR TOOTH REPAIR: Call your dentist and explain your dilemma. Ask for a payment plan to fix your dentures. Be frank about your situation and honest about how much you can pay in order to fix your problem. I can’t imagine that it is smart for you to put crazy glue on your teeth and then put that in your mouth. Who knows what chemicals you are ingesting?

Figure out what you can cut back on in your life so that you can pay the fees for fixing your dentures. Look into teaching hospitals as an alternative source of medical help. Those programs often offer deep discounts for dental services because the students are learning.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: When I was growing up, my parents never had enough money to buy gifts for us kids. We were a family of seven, and money did not stretch that far. So every year at Christmas, my mother would bake a cake or make something else for us to eat that everybody could share.

I have not been able to get past what happened to me as a child in order to be there for my children. I have two kids, and my husband and I have good jobs. We can afford to give them multiple gifts -- not extravagant, but something. Still, I can’t seem to get there. I find it so hard to shop for them because I get lost in thoughts of my past. What can I do to break through? -- Frozen

DEAR FROZEN: Why not bake a cake with your kids to celebrate the holidays? You can make that a tradition in a way that honors what your mother was able to do for you.

The next step can be to establish a new tradition. You can ask your children what they most want for Christmas. Let them suggest several items with the understanding that you would like to get them something special. There can be some surprise in the final outcome if you do not tell them what you are choosing. Once you have their lists, you can review them to see if you feel comfortable getting them each of the items they have listed, or if you will choose only one or two. Do your best to give your children the same number of items so that they don’t mistakenly read anything in to the gifts they receive when they make comparisons.

Beyond that, you may want to consider a bit of therapy. You are holding on to some strong memories and experiences from your childhood. A professional may be able to help you unlock some of those old feelings and release them.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I work independently, so I am accustomed to hustling to get people to pay attention to me. I feel like I’m constantly pitching myself and my ideas. I am also actively following up on everything all the time. That’s what I was taught when I had a job as a producer, but now I’m running into some roadblocks. I have noticed that people aren’t answering my calls the way they used to. I think some people are avoiding me, and that’s a terrible feeling.

My approach has always been to make it easier for people to respond to me by following up about three days after my initial call. That way they don’t have to dig through their emails or phone messages to remember to call me. One client just told me that I am too pushy. She even called me a stalker. That doesn’t seem fair. I consider myself efficient and responsive. What am I doing wrong? -- Unwitting Stalker

DEAR UNWITTING STALKER: Your follow-up methods don’t seem to be working right now, so it’s time to regroup. Following up after three days does seem aggressive -- unless you are facing a tight deadline. A week is a more normal follow-up interval. Also, an email or a text may be a better way to check in, as neither requires you to talk to the person. That way you aren’t interrupting them when they are busy.

Take a moment to reassess your goals and your strategy for reaching out. Getting quiet and still as you contemplate this may help you to discover a softer way of reaching back to potential clients.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)