DEAR HARRIETTE: It’s allergy season again, at least for me. I find myself sneezing and sniffling all the time, even though I use allergy medicine. Sometimes I can tell that my co-workers back up a little when I have allergic reactions. I feel confident that I am not contagious. It’s just allergies, but they do present like a cold sometimes. How can I reassure my co-workers that I am not going to make them sick? -- Allergic

DEAR ALLERGIC: Your allergy sniffles and sneezes may seem like nothing to you, but to most people, it does seem like you are spreading around your germs -- which, in fact, you are even if you’re not sick. When you are in the throes of allergy season, be sure to walk with tissues and hand sanitizer. Sneeze and blow away from the group, even if you have to excuse yourself from a meeting or a dining table. Keep your area tidy, and be mindful of touching other people until after you clean your hands.

Check in with your doctor to see if the prescription you are using is strong enough to manage your allergies. Sometimes a medication change can ward off allergy attacks.

Finally, when you are in the midst of an allergic reaction, let your co-workers know that it is allergy season, and you will do your best to stay clear of them. They will appreciate that.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went to an event the other evening, dressed in my finest -- or so I thought. When I arrived, several people, including the greeters at the front door, complimented me on my outfit. I appreciated that, especially since I haven’t been out for a while, and I have gained quite a bit of weight.

Anyway, at a certain point during the evening, I saw a man who I have known for at least 20 years. He walked up and smiled, and as he was saying hello, he grabbed my arm and made a comment that I looked good -- even though I have put some meat on my bones. I didn’t quite know how to react to that. Yes, I have gained weight, but is that what somebody should say -- pointing out that I have gotten bigger? He unnerved me for a minute. I didn’t say anything, but it bothered me. What do you do in a situation like that? -- Half-Baked Compliment

DEAR HALF-BAKED COMPLIMENT: It sounds like you are especially sensitive about the way your body has transformed over the years. That’s natural. The fact that this man you have known forever obviously noticed that you look different but also complimented you on looking good in your new skin can be taken as a compliment. I doubt that he meant to insult you. He saw you and reacted to the person he saw with honesty and flattery. Sometimes it can be hard to notice a compliment when it is cloaked in a truth that reflects your particular sensitivity.

To be fair, it’s best if people do not address weight at all in conversations. It is so hard to do so without stumbling into offensive language. But, in this man’s case, it seems that he meant to celebrate you, just as those people who didn’t know you were doing that day.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: Am I wrong to think that I could find true love with my high school sweetheart after being separated for more than 30 years? I am not a romantic normally, but recently I ran into my old flame, and sparks flew. I truly loved this guy when I was in 10th grade, and it broke my heart when college came and we parted ways. Nothing bad happened -- just life, really.

When I saw this man again at a work event, I was shocked. We had not seen each other since back in the day, and there he was. We struck it up real nice, and we have been dating. Do I dare believe that this could be true? I don’t want to get hurt, but it feels real. We enjoy each other’s company and have been spending a lot of time together. How can I tell if this is for keeps? -- Old Flame

DEAR OLD FLAME: Stay in the present moment. It’s fine to remember your love from the past, but don’t get caught up comparing then to now. Instead, trust the moment you are in. As you spend time together, notice what you enjoy about being in each other’s company. Pay attention to the things that mesh between you -- and those that don’t. This is important for the long term. It is natural for couples to share some interests and behaviors and not be so simpatico regarding others. It is smart for you to recognize the difference between the two.

Make sure you talk about your hopes for the future and how you think you fit into each other’s lives. If you are open and honest and willing to see if this relationship will work, you will find out. Be sure to base your assessment on what’s happening now, rather than what you remember from the past.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was hanging out with a new friend the other day, and when we started talking, I learned that he is a Republican. I stopped in my tracks. I thought that all my friends shared my somewhat liberal Democratic views. Before I knew his political affiliation, I would say he fit that description, too. We share many values, but I draw the line with what’s happening in our government and was appalled to learn that he is in with them.

I didn’t ask him any more questions after that. I was so shocked I quickly ended our conversation and dipped out. But this guy is a friend. How can I handle the fact that we are on opposing teams? Everything is so political these days that I don’t know how to handle this. -- Us Vs. Them

DEAR US VS. THEM: My husband argues that the political parties are far more similar than different, though certain philosophies do differ. In today’s political times, there surely are some extremes that people are struggling to understand.

Rather than lumping your friend into a category that automatically says that you are opponents, talk to him about his views as you share your own. Have a respectful conversation about what you value and what he believes in. Determine where your values differ and where they may be similar. Agree on topics that you are happy to debate and those that you believe will lead to discord without resolution. You can agree to table those.

You don’t have to leave this friendship. Knowing people who have different viewpoints from yours is important in understanding life and how to engage other people. You should not expect or desire for everyone to be your clone.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I get requests for donations online all the time. I see birthday fundraisers on social media, charity efforts to support various causes, etc.

Recently, I saw a campaign to support a friend’s children’s school. This looked good, and I am happy to support a friend. My question is whether this leaves me vulnerable to other people who know me and will wonder why I chose this campaign over theirs. I like saying that I made the contribution, but I do not like others judging me because I didn’t choose their charity. How can I handle this? -- Wanting To Give

DEAR WANTING TO GIVE: You can stand confident in the knowledge that you have the right to choose your charity of choice. If others ask you why you chose a particular charity, share your reasoning. If they ask why you chose this one over theirs, tell the truth. It could be that you learned about this one first, you feel close to the child who is attached to the charity, you have a personal affinity for the charity -- or whatever else. If you are new to philanthropic giving, you can say that as well -- this is new to you, and you were attracted to this project.

Part of the reason people donate anonymously is to avoid scrutiny from others, either by virtue of the amount of contribution or the affiliation. Whatever you decide, feel confident about giving to a good cause. And don’t allow yourself to be bullied into giving more than you can afford or to charities that do not draw your interest.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My teenage son is extremely shy. When he and I go places and people speak to him, it takes him so long to respond that I often find myself answering questions for him. I know that this isn’t helpful in the long run, but there are times when the pauses are extremely uncomfortable between when someone says something to him and when he responds. How can I support him to become more confident and outgoing, and what should I do when people ask him questions and it takes too long for him to answer? -- Shy Son

DEAR SHY SON: Your son may need to venture out on his own so that he doesn’t have your support in helping to answer questions. You may want to bring him to events with you, remind him of key small-talk points that are specific to where you are (topic of event, key parties who should be in attendance, personal interests, etc.), and let him know that you want to circulate independently. Encourage him to make eye contact and small talk. If he practices, he will be able to say things when he is nervous. It’s easiest for you to bite your tongue if you aren’t there at all. Let him go for it on his own.

Make sure he knows you are not abandoning him. Instead, you are setting him up for success by preparing him and then giving him space to interact with others independent of you.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)