DEAR HARRIETTE: I tried to give my niece money for her birthday, but she doesn’t have a bank account. She is 13 years old. I was shocked. I want to start an account for her, but I don’t want to offend her parents. I think she needs to learn about money and how to grow it. How can I make this recommendation without hurting my sister’s feelings? -- Open an Account

DEAR OPEN AN ACCOUNT: Out of respect for your sister, you can tell her that you want to give your niece the gift of a bank account. You can ask for her blessing in setting it up.

If you believe that your sister will not like it, you can still open an account and put money in it for your niece. You can open a 529 account, which allows you to save money for college tax-free. You can let your niece know about it or have it as a secret until she gets ready to go to college. Or you can take her on a date and set up a savings account with her and encourage her to add money to it.

Obviously it would be ideal for your sister to support the experience, but if your gut says that she will be skittish, your niece still deserves to learn about money and have her own. Because she is a minor, your name will have to be on the account as well.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter has been badgering me about getting her a dog for years. I have always said no, including now -- for two reasons. First, I have no time or inclination to take care of a dog, and no matter what she says, even at age 16, she will not accept responsibility for walking, feeding, bathing and entertaining a dog. Second, I’m allergic to dogs, even hypoallergenic ones.

She met a teacup dog, a tiny dog that can fit in a purse, and has started up all over again. I don’t want to deny her something she really wants, but I can’t do it. How can I make that clear to her without being mean? -- No Dog House

DEAR NO DOG HOUSE: If you are clear that you will not be welcoming a dog into your home, don’t waver. Tell your daughter that a dog isn’t happening. But tell her that when she has her own house, she can do whatever she wants, including having a dog. Let your daughter know that this is not a punishment. More, you know what you can handle. She will need to figure that out for herself when she has a dog. Talk to her about what the responsibilities are so that she knows what she’s getting into. Don’t tell her as if she wouldn’t fulfill them; just remind her so that she has a clear understanding of her job when she becomes a pet owner.

If she is desperate to be around dogs, she might consider volunteering at the humane society or getting a job at a pet store.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am so scared because of the extreme weather in the world. When I listen to the news, I can’t tell what to believe. Some leaders say that this is all happening because of climate change, and they say that it is not too late for us to change our ways. Others say that’s a bunch of baloney, and human beings have nothing to do with the weather patterns.

I am so scared. I want to know if there is anything that I can do to make our planet better rather than just waiting until the next natural disaster possibly hurts me and my family. What can I do? -- Scared of the Weather

DEAR SCARED OF THE WEATHER: While there are varying opinions about the state of our world and our direct responsibility for it, most experts agree that human beings have contributed to climate change. In the simplest of terms, our carbon footprint increases with the energy used to create many conveniences in our lives. According to NASA, “Your carbon footprint is the amount of carbon dioxide released into the air because of your own energy needs. You need transportation, electricity, food, clothing and other goods. Your choices can make a difference.” The most direct way that each of us can support the Earth is by being conscious of how we use energy. That includes turning off electronic appliances.

Now, the debate continues as to whether our choices have caused devastating storms like the most recent, Hurricane Dorian, which devastated the Bahamas. But many experts suggest that we should do things today that can help reduce further damage in the future. For more information about climate change, go to climate.nasa.gov/causes and

https://go.nasa.gov/2lEsuUn. To learn what you can do to help reduce your carbon footprint, go to climatekids.nasa.gov/how-to-help.

If you want to contribute to the rebuilding of communities that have been devastated by Dorian, you can go to redcross.org or look for local charities that are working to help out.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My sister and I are three years apart. We got along pretty well when we were growing up, but we haven’t stayed close as adults. We live in two different countries and rarely see each other. When our family got together this summer, it was nice in a way, but also really awkward. We ended up getting into an argument about nothing really, but it was bad. We left without resolving anything. I fear that if we don’t make a decision to mend our fences, it might never happen. What can we do? -- Bad Sibling Vibes

DEAR BAD SIBLING VIBES: Contact your sister and tell her that you hate that the two of you had such a bad experience. Tell her you don’t want to leave it like that. Ask her if you can agree to forgive each other for whatever happened and figure out ways to stay connected. Tell her that you want to have a relationship with her.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like many of the friends I’ve known since I was in high school are resentful of me ever since I’ve become an influencer. I feel like I’m being mistreated and get ditched by them occasionally. I’m not sure if it is me changing or them being jealous of me. I want to talk to them about this before I end our friendships. How should I discuss this with them? -- Bad Influence

DEAR BAD INFLUENCE: We do now live in a culture where being an “influencer” is a thing. But it has always been true that some people in a community stand out as the ones who attract more attention than others, possibly get more opportunities and even make more money. When a person rises up the food chain, so to speak, and becomes attractive to a much broader group of people, it can be off-putting to the person’s core group of friends. Given the way that social media works with likes and friends and metrics, it can be daunting for real-life friends to see your profile grow. Honestly, it is probably daunting for you, too.

How you can attempt to manage your personal life and your influencer life is to remember that one is work and one is not. Your personal life should remain important to you because those relationships should be grounded in people actually knowing you, not just what you present to the public.

Speak to your friends honestly. Let them know that you do hope that your influencer status will help you with your work pursuits, but you do not want to lose their friendships. Tell them how important they are to you. Remind them that you knew them way before you began to reach influencer status, and you value them tremendously.

Tell them it has hurt your feelings when they have ditched you. Ask if you have done something to offend them. Talk out whatever is going on. That’s how you will know if you will be able to survive this bumpy part of your friendships.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son has been rebellious and unreliable for years now, and it stresses me out to interact with him. He is 19 years old and leaving for his second year of college soon. I want to be a better parent, and I think I need to change my parenting strategy. I gave him too much freedom growing up, and now I want to find ways to discipline him, but it is difficult because he is older. What measures can I take? -- Too Late

DEAR TOO LATE: The best thing you can do is have a frank discussion with your son where you tell him what you think about his behavior and where you believe it is leading him. Apologize for being too lenient with him when he was younger. Point out specific behaviors you have witnessed that have not served him well, but also point out anything good and hopeful about him that you can muster.

Tell him what you want for him and his life, and recommend that he get focused so that he can accomplish his goals. Remind him that he is independent now. Make it clear that you want to help him in any way that you can, but now is the time for him to help himself.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)