DEAR HARRIETTE: I just spent time with some women who are friends with someone I grew up with. I used to be close to this friend’s mother, and I would talk to her from time to time over the years, but we lost touch with each other. I learned from these women that my friend’s mom is in poor health and her daughter is taking care of her. I want to reach out to say hello, but I also feel terrible that I haven’t reached out in several years. Do you think they will appreciate my call, or will they be resentful that it seems like I forgot about them? -- Want to Reach Out

DEAR WANT TO REACH OUT: My vote is for reaching out right away. In this moment, you are thinking about this family and knowing that they are suffering. Your pleasant call will likely bring them joy. Instead of bemoaning how long it has been since you spoke, focus on the here and now. Tell them that you have been thinking about them and that you are so happy to be in touch.

If you can speak directly to the mom and she has her faculties, tell her about your life and your family. She will likely enjoy hearing about anything joyful that you can share. Ask her how she is doing. Listen to her tell you whatever is on her mind. Sometimes older people will dwell on their ailments. Other times, they will reminisce about family. It could even happen that she could chastise you for not calling sooner. Whatever she says, offer her love, and commit to being in touch more often. If you can, it would be great for you to follow up with both of them in the coming months. Who knows how long the mom will be here? It is wonderful for you to stay connected now.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just noticed on social media that one of my high school friends who is now grown and married with children sent his two kids overseas for summer programs. The pictures look amazing. I’m happy for him, but if I am honest, I am also a bit jealous. I could hardly pay for my kids to go to the local day camp. I can’t figure out how he was able to do these trips abroad. I know I shouldn’t feel this way, but I want these kinds of experiences for my children, too. Do you think that people who are not rich can sometimes get their kids into these kinds of programs? -- Battling Envy

DEAR BATTLING ENVY: Thank you for your honesty. It can be hard to see your acquaintances flourishing when you are feeling depleted. Rather than falling into a space of self-pity because you don’t have whatever they are showing on social media, do some research. Many programs for young people offer scholarships for a small percentage of participants.

Look up the programs that you find interesting, and inquire about whether they offer financial aid or academic scholarships. You will likely be surprised to learn how many programs are inclusive in that way.

If you are in touch with your high school friend, you might also reach out to him to say how you were inspired by his kids’ photos. Ask him if either of those programs offers financial aid. If you are direct and honest about your financial situation, you create space for people to support you in reaching your dreams for your family. Honesty is far more powerful and productive than envy.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter spent a month at camp this summer. When she got home, she told me that one of the girls in her group had tried to hurt herself through cutting.

I was shocked. The camp had not mentioned this to me. I think this is a serious mental health problem, and parents should have been informed. Obviously, they want to keep that teen’s identity private, but I don’t understand why they wouldn’t have informed the parents of the incident.

What can I do regarding this situation? My daughter wants to go back to the camp, but I’m reluctant to agree to that if the camp isn’t going to inform parents of potential safety challenges. What do you recommend? -- Camp Communication

DEAR CAMP COMMUNICATION: You should contact the camp administration immediately, let them know what your daughter told you and ask what happened. Let them tell you what they know. Then inquire directly as to why they did not immediately let you know this had occurred. Ask what they did when this happened. Did they send the teen home? Do they have guidance counselors or psychologists on site to help the campers deal with challenges like this? How are they going to try to prevent this type of behavior in the future? Be direct about asking them what they will do to make you feel that it is safe for your daughter to return.

Now, I will tell you that even at the most efficient camps, teens do sometimes try extreme behaviors. If there are disturbed teens at a camp, there is a chance that something like cutting can occur. Camp administration may not be able to prevent this or other dangerous behaviors completely, but they should be required to inform parents and to have protocols in place to support the teen in need and the rest of the camp community.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’ve realized that I need to get a better work ethic, especially with my studies and job; I do not know what I can do to improve this aspect of my life. I often find myself procrastinating heavily, and I need ways to improve my productivity. What are some ways I can hold myself more accountable? -- Need to Mature

DEAR NEED TO MATURE: The most essential thing you must do is change your mindset. You have to tell yourself again and again that you intend to be productive each day and that you have the presence of mind and discipline to do so. From there, you can try this organizational strategy to support you. Start each day by making a list of what you need to accomplish. Break down your tasks by category so that you focus on areas of responsibility. List each individual task that you need to accomplish. If there is time sensitivity, put those items that must be finished first in bold text. Add times next to those that have real deadlines. When you complete a task, mark it off. Little victories will inspire you to keep pushing. At the end of each day, review what you were able to complete and what is remaining.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am preparing to give a speech in front of the underclassmen at the beginning of the school year. I still have a lot of time to prepare, but I want to make sure that I know exactly what to say. I want to improve my confidence with public speaking. Do you have any tips for me to feel less afraid when I am standing in front of a lot of people? -- Public Speaking

DEAR PUBLIC SPEAKING: Start by writing out your intention. What message do you want to communicate to the assembled group? Build a brief speech around this intention, and double-check that everything you say is in alignment with your criteria.

Paint a picture with your words; make sure every word you say shows the listeners what you are talking about. Be descriptive in your storytelling. This will help your audience feel connected to your words. Practice your speech in the mirror so that you grow comfortable with the words and with your delivery.

For the moment, remember that the people you will be addressing want you to do a good job. They will be there to hear what you have to say and to take it in. When you walk onto the stage, make eye contact with people, and notice the ones who are looking at you and smiling. Their positive vibes should boost your confidence. Walk standing straight and tall. When you reach the place where you will speak, take a moment and plant your feet hip-width apart. Look out at your audience. Give them a warm smile, take a breath and begin your speech. Be sure to look up at your audience frequently and engage them with your eyes and smile.

DEAR HARRIETTE: A couple of close friends and I are planning a weekend getaway to a very natural area. Some of these friends plan to play video games and stay inside the entire time, and I don’t want this getaway to be an event like that. How can I convince some of my more introverted friends to go outside and experience something new? -- Weekend Getaway

DEAR WEEKEND GETAWAY: You cannot control your friends. What you should do is figure out which friends want to spend time in nature, and connect with them. Plan to do activities with them to ensure that you enjoy your time this weekend.

You can also attempt to coax the friends who have decided they will stay inside to come out for particular activities. You might point out that some of the games that they play on those devices they can actually do outside. You can also ask them, quite seriously, why they decided to come on the trip if they had no intention of going outside. Perhaps you can spark an honest conversation about choice and get everybody to open up about how they spend their time.

Gaming is popular and can be addictive for some people. While you aren’t trying to get your friends to stop their gaming habit, you can point out to them that gaming doesn’t have to consume every waking moment.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)