DEAR HARRIETTE: I am expecting my first child, and I just found out it is a boy. With all the excitement that came with this news, some concerns definitely popped up in my mind -- specifically about how he enters this world and whether or not I should have him circumcised.

My husband is all for the procedure, but after reading a few articles, I don't feel it is the right thing to do to a newborn. I don't want my baby to feel tremendous pain. I see no difference between male circumcision and female genital mutilation. Both acts hurt the individual and are taking away something they were born with. How can I convince my husband to see my side on why our baby should not have this done to him? -- To Cut or Not To Cut

DEAR TO CUT OR NOT TO CUT: This is an age-old question, sometimes rooted in religious doctrine. Jewish boys are circumcised in a ceremony called a bris, and Muslim families also perform this ritual in their faith. It is not medically required in most cases, and today, about 60% of boys in the United States are circumcised at birth, compared to 80% in the 1970s.

While I understand your concern about the procedure, please know that it is not the same as female genital mutilation, also known as female circumcision. That practice has no health benefits; it is painful and often dangerous, and it leaves women without feeling in their genitals. That is not true for male circumcision. Doctors say that the pain for infants is nominal and short-lived. Many doctors believe it is safer health-wise to circumcise boys, as it helps to keep their genitals clean, and it significantly reduces the risks of a number of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV.

No matter what you choose, if you teach your son to keep himself clean, doctors say that an uncircumcised male can be as healthy as a circumcised one.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am no stranger to social media or the internet, and I often come across "trolls" or internet bullies. When I see people saying mean, negative or hateful words, it makes me feel like I should stand up to them rather than ignore them and let ignorance spread. With this in mind, I know there are appropriate and inappropriate ways to get points across. When I do stand up to haters, some people are receptive to new information, and others will say horrible things back just for the fun of it. How should individuals in this day and age handle situations like these without simply just ignoring them? -- Stop the Trolls

DEAR STOP THE TROLLS: Make your decision on a case-by-case basis. Sometimes the best thing you can do is ignore someone who is spouting negativities. What that person wants the most is attention. If you refuse to take the bait and ignore them, you may be sending a strong enough message. If you feel tempted to respond, you can always block them.

On occasion, if you see something that seems egregious, you can report the person to the social media company for their unacceptable commentary. Lastly, you can write back and tell the person that what he or she is saying is untrue.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: A work colleague who I am not close to but occasionally collaborate with has bad breath. It is more than a bit uncomfortable to speak with him because I try to not be offensive or make faces, but the odor is not OK. I feel I should say something about it, but I am unsure how to go about it appropriately and respectfully. I have noticed that other people move away from him when he starts talking because they get a whiff of his breath. Even though this is an awkward subject, I know I would want somebody to tell me. What can I say? -- Bad Breath

DEAR BAD BREATH: I consulted with a dentist on this topic a few years ago, and he was adamant that people should discreetly speak up when they notice that someone in their lives has bad breath because it could point to serious illness. Halitosis doesn’t just happen. There is typically a reason -- anything from poor dental hygiene to gum disease, bronchitis, pneumonia, diabetes or liver disease. See this article for more information: webmd.com/oral-health/guide/bad-breath.

Knowing this, you could speak to your co-worker privately and tell him that you have noticed that he often has a bad odor to his breath, and you weren’t sure if he was aware of it. Tell him that you have learned that halitosis can be a sign of illness, so you wanted to give him the heads up. On a lighter note, you could offer him a mint as a short-term fix.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently met a great guy, but I found out he has two kids. I'm young. I don't feel ready to take on such an important role, but I really like this guy. I know his attention can never be fully on me. I don't want my selfish needs to get in the way, but I know I'll probably feel jealous if I continue to date him. I am unsure if I should tell him how I feel or just leave the situation entirely. -- Splitting Time

DEAR SPLITTING TIME: If you truly believe that you are not ready to be in a relationship that includes children, you should tell this man. It is beyond difficult for him to try to care for his children, do his job, navigate the dynamics with their mother and find time for a relationship. He needs a partner who is willing to be supportive of his children and who wants, eventually, to be part of their lives. If you are sure you aren’t ready for that, tell him. And yes, you probably should walk away, but don’t leave without explaining why. He deserves a partner who is ready for him and all that he brings to the table. You deserve the same thing.

Every relationship requires compromise. If you like each other enough, you may want to try to figure out what that compromise could be. Be honest. If you don’t want to offer what he needs, don’t pretend.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have brightly colored hair and a nose piercing. I know my image is not always seen as professional, and I find that to be a reason why I get turned down for jobs. However, my image is an expression of myself, and I am not willing to change. I honestly feel that times are changing with my generation starting to move into the workplace. People should not judge each other based on how they look, but by what they can do. I am well-qualified in my field, and I feel that should speak for itself. What do you think about the professional world evolving? -- Self-Expression and Work

DEAR SELF-EXPRESSION AND WORK: It is true that at this time in history, the workplace offers much broader opportunity for potential employees to express themselves freely. Yet it is still largely true that for many, if not most, jobs, dressing in some version of professional attire and styling is preferable. Many employers look to hire people with the necessary skills and worldview to match or at least fit in to the culture of their company.

The good news is that in many creative fields, there is a lot of flexibility around piercings, tattoos and hair color as well as style of dress. If you look hard enough, you are bound to find a company in a creative field that may welcome you if you have the skill set required. This may require you to move. Bigger urban centers tend to be more welcoming of diversity of all types.

Since you have experienced rejection firsthand that you attribute to your appearance, you may also want to reconsider how you present yourself in a job interview. Without compromising your integrity, what choices could you make that define you more professionally without denying the core of who you are? A mistake that people sometimes make is not understanding that it is possible to “be yourself” while also being respectful of what is expected of you where you are going. When you learn how to balance your personal desires with the requirements before you, you will likely find your life much more effective and fulfilling.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am so sad for my daughter. She has an on-again, off-again boyfriend who is stringing her along and killing her self-esteem. She is such a sweet young woman, but it’s almost like this man has occupied her heart and mind. Regardless of what he says or does to her -- nothing violent -- she keeps going back for more. I don’t know how to help her. I have pulled out all the stories I can recall about my friends and me with bad-news boyfriends when we were growing up, but she doesn’t hear anything. She needs to walk away. How can I help her make that choice? -- Bad-News Boyfriend

DEAR BAD-NEWS BOYFRIEND: This may be the perfect time for professional support. When a person’s self-esteem is dashed, it can seem impossible to climb out of a bad situation. I know people in similar relationships -- or worse -- who have shared that they feel like their boyfriend had control of their mind and soul. When that is happening, no matter how much you love your daughter, you may not be able to help her. Find her a therapist with whom she can discuss her life and talk through her challenges. That professional may be able to help her find a bridge back to herself.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)