DEAR HARRIETTE: I just learned about Wendy Williams living in a sober living facility, and it shook me. I don’t know her or anything, but I do know that she has been open about her past drug use. I thought that was behind her by a dozen or more years. She even started a charity to help people climb out of addiction.

It worries me that even if you have money and knowledge about the perils of addiction, you can still succumb to it. I used to use Wendy as an example for my niece who has struggled with drug addiction; I'd point out that Wendy pulled herself out of a terrible situation and made a good life for herself. Now I don’t know what to say. My niece continues to deal with addiction issues. I didn’t hinge everything on Wendy, of course, but I feel like this latest revelation about her vulnerability only helps to make my niece’s situation that much more fragile. -- Fighting Addiction

DEAR FIGHTING ADDICTION: The stats for people fighting addiction in this country are staggering. In 2017, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health reported that 19.7 million American adults (aged 12 and over) battled a substance abuse disorder. Further, 1 out of 8 adults suffered with both alcohol and drug use disorders simultaneously. In terms of relapse, 40 to 60 percent of addicts and alcoholics relapse within the first year, though the numbers do go down to about 15 percent with years of recovery under the belt.

Addiction programs and counselors will tell you that the way you fight addiction is one day at a time. For your niece, the best you can do is talk to her about her life. Make it clear to her that addiction is a disease and that she should get help to keep her strong.

It should be noted that Wendy didn't mention a relapse in her announcement, just that she had moved into a sober living facility. That said, she can still be an example of how hard it is to stay sober. Use her story to support your niece.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I talk to my goddaughter regularly, and she is a sweet young woman. She has been on her own for a couple of years now, and it sounds like she is building a nice life for herself. She has a good job, but she had a boyfriend who didn’t treat her well. She dumped him recently, but he keeps coming back. I tell her that she needs to expand her horizons, but when he calls, she jumps.

My goddaughter recently met a guy who is smart and kind and likes her a lot. They have been going out, and it sounds good. Still, she remains emotionally available to the other one. How can I help her to see that this guy is an opportunist and selfish, and he isn’t worth her time? -- Bad Boyfriend

DEAR BAD BOYFRIEND: All you can do is tell her what you know a healthy relationship looks like. Describe what she deserves, and remind her of her value. Try not to talk negatively about this man, as that might drive her closer to him. Instead, paint a picture for her of what you believe she deserves. Encourage her to give the other man a chance, too!

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My girlfriend is a devout Christian, and with Easter coming up, she is so excited about going to church and dressing up for it. She told me that every year since she was a little girl, her family has gone all-out for Easter, buying dressy outfits, taking pictures and going to church. I am happy and intrigued to see all of the excitement around this and to see how happy the children in the family are, but I do not share the enthusiasm. I have never been devout. I am a man of faith and all, but I don’t have rituals about going to church. Should I tell my girlfriend about my experience? I will go with her to church and be with her, but I don’t like all the fanfare. -- Low-Key Christian

DEAR LOW-KEY CHRISTIAN: You should tell your girlfriend how you grew up and what you value, but don’t try to stifle her excitement. In many Christian households, Easter is the biggest celebration, as it marks the time when Christ rose from the dead. It is a holy time. Some families study the Bible and the implicit meaning in the Resurrection for their whole lives. Some revel in the idea of renewal and go all-out with fancy outfits, Easter egg hunts and other outward displays of joy. Give your girlfriend a pass. If she and her family enjoy the fanfare, so be it. You can let her know that it isn’t really your thing, so you will support her, but ask her not to expect you to get caught up in the parade of fashion.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a girlfriend who shared with me that she suffers from diabetes. She made me promise not to tell anyone because she is embarrassed. I agreed. It’s nobody’s business what she is going through. But we have been hanging out, and I see her consume massive amounts of sugar. She seems to crave sweets. It is disturbing to see her chowing down on sweets when I know it could hurt her. My dad died from complications of diabetes, and it was ugly. I want to warn her, but I don’t think she will listen. What should I do? -- Ticking Time Bomb

DEAR TICKING TIME BOMB: A nutritionist shared that it takes about 12 years for the human body to develop diabetes. It is not something that comes on fast like the flu or some other diseases. It was slow to develop in your friend, and won’t be easy for her to control. And yet, of course she should stop eating so many sweets. Sadly, you cannot manage what she eats.

Tell your friend stories about your father. Did he have amputations? Did he lose his sight? These are common complications of diabetes. Plead with your friend to be more mindful of what she consumes. Remind her that you love her and want her to be healthy, but in order for her to do, so she has to cut back dramatically on sweets. If you can’t watch her when she’s binge eating, tell her you have to go when she starts eating like that. You do not have to witness her demise. You can walk away.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am worried about the recent college application scandal. While my family is not rich, we definitely want to take advantage of every opportunity before us as our kids prepare to go to college, including talking to our friends who are in high positions at universities, asking them to look out for our twins. My husband and I have never done anything illegal, but I fear that since this scandal, even asking about information on schools our kids like could be viewed as inappropriate. What can we do now? -- Navigating the College Process

DEAR NAVIGATING THE COLLEGE PROCESS: Even before this scandal hit, exposing how some wealthy families have literally bought their children’s way into college, the process has been challenging. Thousands of students are vying for the opportunity to go to the college of their choice, and competition is high. Now that illegal behavior has been uncovered, a lot more scrutiny will be paid to the admissions process. This is good, and it may help you.

You absolutely can call on people you know to ask for advice and recommendations for your children. Getting written and verbal recommendations remains legitimate and legal. Start at your children’s high school. The guidance counselor should be your first resource. Learn what he or she knows about your children as students and what schools could be a good fit for them. You can enroll your child into interview prep courses. You may consider hiring a private educational consultant who knows the college process and can help you find the right fit for your children, especially if the guidance counselor is not helpful enough.

For a wealth of information and resources, read this article: nytimes.com/2019/03/18/well/family/college-bribery-scandal-admissions-advice.html.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a freelancer, and work had been terribly slow. It has gotten busy lately, and now I am juggling, trying to manage my schedule. I feel like I have to accept every job that comes my way because I have often gone months between gigs. I am a little overwhelmed with the workflow, and I’m getting exhausted. How can I manage my relationships with my clients better when I feel like I have a short fuse because I’m overstretched? -- Customer Relations

DEAR CUSTOMER RELATIONS: Get organized. Keep track of each of your jobs using a calendar or software that helps to manage your projects. The goal is to write down everything, including tentative deadlines, so that you have a clear picture in front of you of your responsibilities. You don’t want to double-book yourself inadvertently. Check off each job when it is complete -- and be sure that you turn in your billing at once.

Be kind and attentive to your clients. Do not ever make excuses about not completing a job because you were doing another. It is your duty to compartmentalize. Each client wants to feel like the most important on your list. Be gracious and follow up with thank-you notes that show your appreciation.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)