DEAR HARRIETTE: I learned how to cook a few years ago after I had my daughter. Up to then, my husband and I ate out pretty much every day. Even if we ate at home, we would buy takeout. We ate healthy, all things considered. In our city, it is easy to find good food that is not expensive. Now I have a few key dishes that I make that are pretty good, if I do say so myself.

The problem is that my relatives remember that I never cooked before, so they constantly tease me when we have family get-togethers. When I offer to cook something, they try to convince me not to do it. They say they don’t even want to try my cooking. I am offended by that. How can I get them to taste my new recipes? -- Introducing the Cook

DEAR INTRODUCING THE COOK: Work with whoever the host is to include some of your dishes at family gatherings. Don’t make a big fuss of it; just serve the food. Allow someone to compliment one of your dishes, at which point you can let them know that you made it. Stop seeking their approval, as it sets you up for that family teasing. Instead, just do your thing. Make the dishes, and let them enjoy. Over time, you will win them over.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My uncle died, and when I asked his daughter, my cousin, if I could have one of his bow ties as a memento of sorts, she refused. She told me that she had already given them to her husband, and there were none left. That sounds crazy to me. My uncle was 90 years old, and he wore bow ties every day. He must have had a hundred of them. She couldn’t spare one? That hurt my feelings. Should I say anything else to her? I know that people get weird when they grieve, but I don’t think it was too much to ask for one of his bow ties. -- Stingy Cousin

DEAR STINGY COUSIN: You are right to recognize that people act strangely when their loved ones die. It is best to practice detachment about the deceased’s belongings because anything else usually leads to hurt feelings. This is much easier said than done, by the way. Your cousin seems overly attached to her father’s belongings. She is clearly in pain.

Give it some time. When you talk to her later on, you may want to mention your desire again. Tell her that you know she gave all of her dad’s bow ties to her husband, but you still long to have one of them. Ask her if it is OK for you to ask her husband to share one with you. If your second request doesn’t snap her out of her selfishness, just let it go. You have the memories of your uncle. That may have to suffice. Do your best to forgive your cousin. One day she may wake up and realize that she is not the only one grieving.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am extremely disorganized, and it’s catching up with me. I just scheduled three meetings that overlap each other. I can’t believe I did that, but it’s true. They are all personal, after-work meetings, but still. My friends feel like I don’t care about them. My work is crazy busy, and I am so tired that I have been forgetful about keeping a good schedule. What should I say to my friends, and how can I get better organized? -- Too Much to Handle

DEAR TOO MUCH TO HANDLE: I keep a calendar and daily schedule that includes everything that is important to me, including personal responsibilities. When I am at the top of my game, I make my list the night before. I plan out my day, and often my week, so that I know how I will order my steps upon waking. I include such list items as "meditate," "drink water," "go to the gym," "call Mama," and all of my work items. I also do my best to record meetings the moment I make them. Even if the meeting starts out as tentative, I write it down with a question mark. That holds the space and alerts me to pay attention before I fill it with something else.

If and when you slip up, which is possible for even the most organized person, apologize immediately. Just know that apologies work best when behavior changes. If you keep doing the same thing that inconveniences other people, your apologies will begin to ring hollow.

DEAR HARRIETTE: Now that my son is a teenager, I have given him a few more privileges. We live in a city with a good public transportation system, and I let him go about on his own after school with his friends. He does have a curfew. Plus, I require him to keep his phone on with a GPS tracking system so that we can see each other’s whereabouts. He hates this, but it is my insurance policy for a teenager so that I have a sense of where he is. Sometimes he turns it off, and I have threatened to ground him if he does that again. Do you think that grounding is too harsh? I realize that sometimes the GPS system glitches, even if we both have it on. How can I keep him accountable? -- Teens on the Loose

DEAR TEEN ON THE LOOSE: Your job as a parent is to teach your child how to be responsible when you are not around. This is beginning now. The GPS is a good backup plan, but what you really need is for your son to be in communication with you as he is moving about town. Make a system where he texts you when he gets to his destination. You can also require him to send you a photo of him and his friends when he arrives. He may hate that, but he will hate it more if he has to stay at home.

Regarding rescinding privileges, if he really is dodging you, ground him. He will quickly learn that being responsive and honest is way more effective than being sneaky and lying.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I seem to have no libido whatsoever. My husband is mad at me because I have not been interested in sex for years now. He is a good man who hasn’t strayed (yet), but I feel bad because it’s not fair to him. How can I get interest back?

When it first started, we were having serious marital problems, and I didn’t want to be bothered. Now I can’t put my finger on it. I just have no sexual feelings at all. How can I get them back? -- No Libido

DEAR NO LIBIDO: Start by going to your doctor for a checkup. Explain your situation. Ask if there is any medical reason why you have lost interest in sex. Ask if there is anything the doctor can recommend to help you get your desire back. There may be nutritional supplements that you can take to support you.

You may also want to go to a therapist. Especially since this dry spell began due to friction in your marriage, you may have some unresolved issues that you need to address. A psychologist may be able to help you sort through your experiences and feelings to get to the other side. Consider going to a sex therapist -- someone who specializes in helping people to unlock their issues to help them find their way to a healthy sexual life.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just received a Facebook message from a guy who used to date my sister back when we were in grade school. We are now in our 50s. This guy wrote to me to say he wants to be in touch with my sister, but he can’t find her on social media. He asked me to help.

I spoke to my sister, and she is completely not interested. She said they haven’t talked for like 40 years, and she has no desire to speak to him now. What do I say to the guy? He has been blowing up my Facebook messenger. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but my sister said no. -- No Rekindling

DEAR NO REKINDLING: As difficult as it may seem, you will have to tell this man that you've passed along his request, and your sister will reach out to him if she decides to do so. You can tell him that she is busy and preoccupied, so you can’t guarantee anything. Do not lead this man into believing that your sister may contact him in the future. You can tell him that your sister does not use social media and generally she has a small network of people in her personal sphere. Perhaps this will help him to not take it personally if she never picks up the phone. Know that this is not your problem. You do not have to hold this man’s hand through the experience. You will have done your job after you spell it out for him once.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)