DEAR HARRIETTE: I live with two of my college buddies. We’ve been living together for almost a year now, and things have gone smoothly because we are used to each other. One of my buddies has a girlfriend, and the other one is dating around. Recently, he’s been seeing someone and has brought her over a couple of times. When he goes to sleep, she will come out and watch TV with me in the living room. I didn’t think much of it at first, but it's starting to weird me out. She asks me personal and invasive questions that I don't answer. A few times, I felt like she was coming on to me. My buddy is starting to get serious with this girl, and I want to warn him about my encounters with her. Do you think it’s selfish of me to bring up some of the things I found alarming? -- Friend Found a New Girl, Syracuse, New York

DEAR FRIEND FOUND A NEW GIRL: I would start with her. The next time she comes out and starts the grand inquisition, turn it around on her. Ask her what’s up. Tell her you don’t understand why she’s trying to get in your business. Ask her what her intentions are with your friend. Make it clear that you have his back and that you want to be sure she does, too. Ask her to stop with the questions and stay in her lane.

Talk to your friend and let him know that you have a few doubts about his girlfriend. Do not be an alarmist, though. Just tell him what you have experienced -- including your talk with her. Give him space to be comfortable staying with her if he chooses. Don’t be judgmental.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m 17, and I have always compared myself to my sisters and friends. My parents are hard on me about my weight. I’m normal-sized -- not too thin, but not fat. I recently developed an eating disorder. I have been seeing someone about it, but it hasn’t been helping. I know it doesn’t help because I am still comparing myself to my sisters, who are naturally skinny. I can’t stand looking at Instagram and Snapchat and seeing all these skinny girls. My parents think that I’m better and that my disorder has been controlled, but I'm not and it’s not. I don’t think it will ever go away. Am I ever going to feel good in my skin? -- Eating Disorder, Shreveport, Louisiana

DEAR EATING DISORDER: Keep going to your counselor, and be as honest as you can about what you are doing and how you are feeling. Being compared to others can be stressful and can push you toward unhealthy behavior. I'm sorry that your parents are making it harder for you, even unknowingly. Tell them that you need their support, not their judgment about your body size. Stop looking at social media and making unhealthy comparisons. Focus on your studies, and look to build friendships with positive people. Don’t give up on counseling. That can be your lifeline to better health. If you feel you need to talk to someone immediately, there is a helpline. Call 1-888-232-6949. For more information about dealing with eating disorders, visit bulimia.com/topics/eating-disorder-hotline.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am 21 years old. I want to have breast-reduction surgery, but my parents won’t let me. I’m only 5 feet, 2 inches tall and extremely top-heavy. My back is always sore, I have to wear two sports bras when I work out and my body is completely disproportionate. My parents say I can get the surgery when I’m older and make my own money, but I want it now. I’m so uncomfortable. I don’t care what I look like; I am in physical pain. I have tried explaining it to my parents, but they don’t understand, especially my flat-chested mom. Do you think I should schedule an appointment to hear a doctor’s point of view? -- Big-Chested Girl, Oklahoma City

DEAR BIG CHESTED GIRL: You seem to have a legitimate concern that is worth exploring with your doctor. Schedule an appointment for a consultation. Learn your doctor’s opinion on the subject. Find out how much a breast reduction costs and if it is covered by your insurance. Sometimes plastic surgery is covered when it is deemed of medical importance. If your doctor agrees with your assessment, ask him or her to talk to your parents with you. This may help them gain a better understanding of your circumstances. Depending on the cost, you may still have to wait, though.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m a rising sophomore at my university, and I got cut from the soccer team at school. I’m so upset; I'm not looking forward to going back to school. All my friends are on the team, so when they have games and practices, I feel like I'm not going to have anyone to hang out with. I love playing sports. I’ve been playing soccer my entire life, and it’s always been the way for me to take my mind off things. Now I feel like I have nothing. I can’t believe I’m going to be going back this semester without the team. How am I supposed to do anything if soccer was all I had? -- Cut From the Team, Pikesville, Maryland

DEAR CUT FROM THE TEAM: It can be devastating to lose a big part of your identity, as you have. Your soccer experience is fully intertwined in the rest of your life, but you need to think of this challenging moment as a time to reconfigure your life. What else interests you? Figure out alternative extracurricular activities that can occupy your time. If you want to stick with soccer, join an intermural team or coach younger kids. You can still go to the soccer games, but I don’t recommend hanging around them all the time. Build new experiences to begin to feel happy and whole again. You may lose some of your soccer buddies. Know that your real friends will find a way to make time for you as you expand your vision and welcome other experiences and people into your life.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m self-conscious about my skin. I'm starting my freshman year of high school, and my skin is so bad. I recently met with my dermatologist, and he put me on medication, but I don’t think it’s going to work as quickly as I want it to. I try new makeup products to cover up my blemishes, but it almost looks worse. I’m upset that I'm going to be starting high school with bad skin.

On top of that, I found out that I won't be getting my braces off until the middle of the year. I feel like I’m the only rising freshman with bad skin and braces. Am I ever going to get over my insecurities? -- Insecure Freshman, Philadelphia

DEAR INSECURE FRESHMAN: This may be hard for you to believe, but you are not alone. Bad skin typically comes from a combination of natural hormonal changes during puberty and your diet. It can take a long time for you to get your skin under control, even when you are mindful and follow your doctor’s directions. That means you must have patience as you follow the protocol.

You are right about makeup. It tends to make distressed skin look worse. As hard as it may seem, it is best for you not to put makeup on top of your blemishes. If you can keep your skin clean while it is healing, it will clear up sooner.

As far as braces go, think about the payoff. You will have straight teeth, though the process is long and often uncomfortable. You can weather this storm. Take stock as you go around school to see how many people share your pain. You will be amazed at how many students are just like you.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My mom’s boyfriend proposed to her last week. They have been seeing each other for two years, and he makes her happy. I'm not close with him, so I don’t know how I feel about this.

I have such a strong relationship with my dad that I know no man will ever fill his shoes. Sometimes my mom’s boyfriend will try to act like a paternal figure, as if I don’t have one. I know he is trying hard and just wants my siblings and me to like him, but I think he tries too hard. We have an amicable relationship, and I’m happy to see my mom happy, but I still don’t know how I feel about him. Is that normal, considering my mom is going to be marrying this man? -- Mom Marries New Man, Boston

DEAR MOM MARRIES NEW MAN: This is often an awkward moment for families, especially when your dad still figures prominently in your life. Talk to your mother about expectations. What does she hope your relationship will become with her soon-to-be-husband? Make it clear to her that you remain close with your father and you do not want her fiance to be a father figure. Establish what the goal is, and work toward that. At the very least, be respectful and kind to him.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)