DEAR HARRIETTE: My parents have been arguing a lot for the past couple of months. Although they argue, I don’t think they would ever consider separating or getting a divorce. I know that it’s not my place to say anything, but I am the oldest of four sisters, and I think that my parents need to change. My sisters get upset when my parents fight, and it has been going on for too long. I tried saying something to my mom, but she got defensive and told me I don’t know anything about marriage. It’s true, I don’t -- I have never been married, but I do know that the way they fight is not healthy. Do I try talking to my mom again, or should I get an objective third party involved? -- Worried Daughter, Cincinnati, Ohio

DEAR WORRIED DAUGHTER: Living through this rocky period of your parents’ relationship has got to be exhausting and scary. Are there any other family members or close friends nearby? It sounds like you could use an intervention staged by adult loved ones who may be able to reflect to your parents what their feuding is doing to the family. Talk to whomever you feel closest to, and ask for support. While your parents probably won’t appreciate at first that you have told their business to others, this is your life, too. You want to protect your siblings and yourself. Make that clear, and work on the intervention now.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m pregnant with my second baby girl. My eldest is 2, and I'm due in September. My husband and I are overjoyed about having our second baby. However, I can’t stop thinking about how the attention is going to be off of my toddler. I’m nervous that I'm going to give the newborn all of my attention, and my toddler is not going to feel the affection and love that we gave her when she was an only child. I know that it’s something that my husband and I need to be conscious of, but a newborn is such hard work. I’m so excited, but I'm also nervous and scared. How do I give my toddler an equal amount of my attention when the baby is born? -- Soon-to-Be Mother of Two, Pittsburgh

DEAR SOON-TO-BE MOTHER OF TWO: You need help. The reality is that your first child will probably experience some difficulties because she will no longer be the sole recipient of your affection. That’s reality. One way that you can ensure that she continues to feel loved and supported is to make a plan that involves support. Have a family member, friend or nanny come in to help you with basic things for the baby and playtime with your eldest child. This will give you a chance to be with each child and get much-needed rest.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my girlfriends confided in me that she is having marital struggles. I felt bad for her. Clearly, she is going through a tough time. I did my best to listen well and to talk less, but in the end, I told her that I have been having my own struggles, and if we are being honest, a few of our mutual friends have had some ups and downs of late. I didn’t say this to diminish her personal issues, but it is true that for those of us who have been married for a few years (some for more than 10), stuff comes up. I didn’t have any grand solution for her other than to say that I know, in my case, we just keep working at it. Do you think I let her down by telling my story and letting her know that she’s not alone? I think she was hoping that there was some miracle advice I could give her that would heal her wounds. -- Marital Bliss, Albuquerque, New Mexico

DEAR MARITAL BLISS: When friends are in pain, of course you want to help them feel better. When it comes to marriage, there is no playbook to follow. That said, it can be comforting to know that others share your experience. Even if your friend didn’t seem to want to hear about how directly connected your experience may be to hers, it may give her a bit of perspective.

Marriages that last must weather emotional storms. For most couples, every single day is not blissful. Instead, there can be any number of conflicts that arise that have to be faced. It was good for you to let your friend know that she is not alone. Couples do sometimes have difficulties. Recommend to her that they go to couples counseling. What you should not do is attempt to be a surrogate counselor yourself. Stay a supportive friend.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have worked out almost every day since the beginning of the year. I am proud of my dedication but bummed out that now that summer's here, I haven’t gotten close to my summer weight. I know that I didn’t put the weight on in just one year, but I did think that if I was committed to fitness, it would pay off in a bigger way. What am I doing wrong? I’m feeling defeated. -- Not Fit Enough, Denver

DEAR NOT FIT ENOUGH: Patience and long-term commitment to your fitness and overall health are your anchors here. I’m sorry you did not reach your summer goal, but please do not give up. What my trainer has shared with me is that the exercise is essential, but the other requirement is being dogged about what you put in your mouth. What you eat and drink affects your weight more than anything. Cutting back significantly on calorie intake is the key to shedding pounds. You should log your caloric intake daily. You can use any number of tracker systems to make it easy. This will likely identify ways in which you can trim your diet and, in turn, your waist.

You should also get a physical from your internist to ensure that you are not facing any underlying health concerns that you need to address.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been looking for a summer baby-sitting job, so I put an ad on an online community board and have gotten a couple of responses. One family is looking for a few days a week, which is perfect for me. I arranged to meet the mother and kids prior to my start date, which I thought was normal. When I got there, the mom seemed to be out of it and disinterested in me -- and even in her kids.

I didn’t get a good feeling about the parents, but the kids seem easy and adorable. Do you think I should take the job even if I don’t feel comfortable around the parents? -- Weird Parents, Philadelphia

DEAR WEIRD PARENTS: You should keep your eyes open, but go ahead and take the job. Pay attention when you work with the children to ensure that they feel safe and well cared for. Talk to the mom before she goes out to learn of any idiosyncrasies you should know about the children or their family rituals. Ask about the children’s habits and the parents' expectations.

It could be that the mom was having a bad day. It could be that there are deeper issues that will come up at some point. As the baby sitter, your job is to care for the children. You do not need to double as a psychologist or adviser. Watch, pay attention and assess whether it can become a good fit for a few days per week. If not, give your notice and say that you don’t think it’s working.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is very close with his family, which is one of the things I love about him. I am also very close with his parents and often have dinner at their house. One thing that is getting on my nerves lately is that his parents -- especially his mom -- do absolutely everything for him. His mom books his doctor appointments, makes his lunch and everything in between. He is 22 years old. I’m not sure why it bothers me so much. Maybe it’s because I am the total opposite of that, or that I think he should be doing this stuff himself. Is this normal? Will he ever grow out of having everything done for him? -- Dating a Mama's Boy, Jackson, Mississippi

DEAR DATING A MAMA’S BOY: This is a lot to observe, but realize that you can’t do anything about it. The relationship between mother and son is strong. You will do best to stay out of it. When you and your boyfriend are alone, tell him that you have noticed how much his mother tends to him. You can also point out that you hope that if you two decide to build a life together, you would like to share responsibilities, not assume the role that his mother has played. Nor would you want any children that you have to feel that they should rely on you to do everything for them. It’s good to plant these seeds now, since they will likely crop up again if you choose to stay together.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)