DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently discovered my dad is cheating on my mom. He’s a middle school math teacher at my old school, and my mom is a stay-at-home mom. I was driving down a street I usually take to work, which is a couple of miles from my house, and I stopped at a red light. As I turned my head, I saw my dad in the car with another middle school teacher.
I thought maybe they were running an errand together, so I called my dad. He answered, and I said, “Hey, Dad, where are you right now?” He said, “I’m still at school working late.” I yelled from my car and he looked at me, shocked, and I drove off crying because I knew what it meant.
I have to tell my mom; it’s not fair to her, but I don’t want to be the reason they break things off. How do I ever look at my dad the same? How do I comfort my mom during this time? -- Sad Daughter, Miami
DEAR SAD DAUGHTER: I’m so sorry you had to see this. Before talking to your mother, you should have a talk with your father. Tell him how upset you are that he lied to you. Explain that it looks like he is cheating on your mom with that other teacher, and you are devastated. Ask him if he plans on leaving your family. Put him on the spot, and ask him how he intends to handle the situation.
Then, tell him that you are going to tell your mother. Tell him you hope he will be able to figure out how to save your family, because you love him and your mom very much, but you have to tell her what you saw.