DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is 16 years old. She is in her second year of high school and is a very sweet, compassionate, caring girl. She is currently dating a senior boy who is 18.

I am afraid my daughter is in an unhealthy relationship with her boyfriend. I do not believe he physically abuses her, but I feel like he emotionally bullies her into doing whatever he wants. I don’t like his personality at all, let alone their age difference.

I want to help my daughter, but I don’t know where to begin at all. Coming from her father, I want to be there for her and protect her from getting hurt, but I also don’t want to seem overprotective. Do you have any advice for a father trying to talk to his daughter about a sensitive topic? -- Scared Father, Bronxville, New York

DEAR SCARED FATHER: You should tread lightly here, because people who feel they are in love don’t listen well. Plus, unfortunately, daughters often seem immune to their fathers’ advice at the very moment when they need it the most.

One way you may get her to hear you is to tell her stories -- true stories -- about your life in the dating world and any missteps that you or your friends may have experienced. Give her examples of controlling men and how they can mess up women’s emotional well-being. Tell her you are concerned about the way that her boyfriend is treating her and that you would be a bad dad if you didn’t mention it. Assure her that you will support her no matter what, but encourage her to balance her time with other friends.

Stay aware of her behavior and her free time, to the best of your ability. If she is willing to talk to you, be a good listener and do not judge. She may have to get her heart broken before she learns her lesson. Remain close so that you can help soften the blow.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just moved into a new apartment. The space was originally a two-bedroom apartment, but my roommates and I converted the living room into another “bedroom,” so the space now sleeps three. Although I knew this decision would mean living space would be tight, my roommate who lives in the living room is taking up too much space. Not only is her bed in the middle of the room, but she is extremely messy, so her things are strewn all over the apartment! I don’t want to criticize her way of living, but at the same time I need to tell her to clean up her things. Do you know how I can talk to her without offending her? -- Messy Roommate Problems, Akron, Ohio

DEAR MESSY ROOMMATE PROBLEMS: Request a household meeting -- something that would be good to do on a weekly basis anyway. Remind your roommates that you are living in a tight space and that it’s important for everyone to work hard to maintain some order. Suggest a task you will do, and ask each roommate to pitch in. To the messy one, remind her that she lives in a common space, and you all need her to be tidier.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My son and his friends from college have all signed up for a trip to Israel after the school year ends, called Birthright Israel. With all of the protests and violence occurring on the Palestinian border, I am scared to let my son go on the trip. Although the program that he is going through has assured the parents that the trip is extremely safe and they will be taking extra precautions, I would rather my son and his friends postpone the trip. How can I bring this up to him and convince him to change the time of the trip? Do you think this is the right thing to do, or am I being irrational? -- Questioning Son's Trip, Queens, New York

DEAR QUESTIONING SON’S TRIP: I’m with you. While I know that many young people take this trip to Israel upon completion of college as a rite of passage, I also know that the violence in the area has escalated in recent days and weeks, and the region is far from stable. I’m sure that the organizers will do all in their power to protect the young people who go, but I would be skeptical as to whether that is enough.

I spoke to a neighbor friend who is from Israel, and she assured me that it is possible to go there and be safe. She encourages people to make the trip anyway. That said, I don’t think I would let my child go there this summer.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I’m in a bit of a complicated friendship. I have a friend, Justin, who has deep feelings for me, but I don’t feel the same about him. We hook up every once in a while, but there are other guys I hook up with, too.

I recently found out that I have syphilis; a few weeks ago I checked my thigh and saw there was this big ball shape and it hurt every time I walked, so I went to the doctor. After my appointment, I called everyone I was sexually active with and told them to get tested. Most reacted OK. Justin shut down and told me he was upset with me because he felt as if I accused him of giving me syphilis. Now he doesn’t want to be friends with me because he thinks I accused him. How do I get through to him that I was just telling him in case I gave it to him? I wasn’t accusing him of anything. -- Paranoid Friend, San Francisco

DEAR PARANOID FRIEND: I have to start by scolding you a bit. If you are going to "hook up" with multiple partners, is it imperative that you practice safe sex. Unprotected sex can lead to so many health problems. You are being reckless.

I will commend you for going to the doctor AND telling all of your sexual partners about your diagnosis. That couldn’t have been easy to do. With Justin, you can tell him once more that you accused him of nothing. Instead, you were informing him so he could get tested. After that, leave him be. He is likely also upset because your feelings do not match his. You may be better off letting him go.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

DEAR HARRIETTE: My acquaintance "Mark" recently committed suicide. I wasn’t that close with him, but we were both on sports teams -- I’m a lacrosse player, and he was on the baseball team. He was dating one of my teammates, but they broke up three months ago after being together for two years. He was one of those guys who was always smiling and had so many friends. He was the life of the party and a pretty good baseball player.

He wasn’t the best boyfriend to my teammate because he wasn’t loyal, but he did make her happy. I’m pretty upset about the whole situation because he was always kind to me, and I can’t imagine how she must be feeling. How can I be there for her without being overbearing? -- Lending a Hand, Bridgeport, Connecticut

DEAR LENDING A HAND: I am so sorry for your loss. Whenever a young person chooses to end his or her life, it is a tragedy that’s almost impossible to bear. I trust that you will take advantage of whatever mental health support your school offers, because this will be hard for everyone.

Reach out to your teammate. Tell her how sorry you are about Mark's passing. Ask how she’s doing and if you can be of help to her in any way. Sometimes people need to talk. Other times they need to be quiet. Check in with her regularly at first to see if she needs or wants anything. Don’t push, just let her know you are there for her.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am stressed out. I am failing two of my classes, and the semester ends in a month. I have been working with my professors to get my grades up, but I can’t figure out how to master my assignments for this class. I don’t want to disappoint my family because they have sacrificed so much for me, but I’m not sure if health science is the major for me.

My mother has always wanted me to be a doctor, but I struggle in my courses. How do I tell my family that I want to change my major because it doesn’t interest me, and I am not doing well? I just want to make them proud, but I feel like I will crush their dreams for me. -- Broken Dream, Sausalito, California

DEAR BROKEN DREAM: As tough as it seems now to tell your parents what’s going on, you must. This starts with a reality check. If you do not want to be a doctor, face that fact and tell your parents. Point out that you have worked hard to fulfill their dream for you. Not only is this not what you want for your life, but you aren’t good at the work required to get there.

Think about what you want to do with your life. Talk to an adviser to get input on how to change your major to a subject more fitting for your personality and interests. While your parents may initially be disappointed, they will rally behind you if you prove to them that you can survive and thrive in school as you prepare to become independent.

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)